


The Game

by angel_authoress



Series: mothman & spaceboy [1]
Category: Invader Zim
Genre: (but more angst than fluff), Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Enemies to Friends, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Enemies to Lovers, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Minor Original Character(s), ZADF, ZaDr, starts as zadf but turns into zadr, the cliche 'the tallest finally tell zim' fic that nobody wanted
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-25
Updated: 2018-05-06
Packaged: 2019-03-09 06:25:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 49,950
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13475604
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angel_authoress/pseuds/angel_authoress
Summary: Zim and Dib have both successfully graduated high school. Dib is ready to start venturing out into the world, but finds himself stuck between a rock and a hard place: keep defending the world from Zim, or move on with his life.Meanwhile, the secret that the Tallest have been hiding from Zim for years is finally revealed- and it's left Zim unsure of what to do next. But when the Control Brains make a surprising order for his execution, Zim finds himself in more danger than he realizes, and it's up to Dib as to whether or not to save him. (ZADF, eventual ZADR)





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: writing fanfiction for a kid's cartoon... this is what my life has become guys.
> 
> anyways, hi, I'm angel authoress. this is my first time writing for IZ so go easy on me!
> 
> please keep in mind that this fic will most likely contain zadr. if this bothers you, you're still more than welcome to read, but I am warning you in advance.
> 
> I'd like to clarify before I begin that Dib is 18, Gaz is 17, and Zim is 165-168. I tried to create a somewhat consistent timeline so forgive me if Zim's age is inaccurate. 
> 
> Next, this fic does feature an OC, but she is not a very huge part of the plot. I originally planned to have a lot more scenes for her with more of a background, but I didn't want to take away too much from the main story. Depending on how well this story does, I may write a side story for her.
> 
> Although it's not necessary, I would recommend watching the 'Mopiness of Doom' and 'The Trial' script readings from InvaderCon before reading this. There are several references to these episodes throughout the fic. It's debatable as to whether or not they're considered 'canon' since they never aired, but oh well. This is a fanfic, none of this is canon. Again, not necessary but highly recommended. You can find them on YouTube.
> 
> I didn't mark this fic as explicit because I don't plan to include any sex scenes. I only rate my fics M/E if there's any sex scenes, which there won't be. However, I know that there are a lot of younger fans in the IZ fanbase, so for you guys, please be warned that this fic is pretty packed full of curse words, violence, and disturbing themes. 
> 
> Lastly, I will try to update this fic weekly. I'm juggling four classes right now AND another fic, so I'm kinda swamped with work, but the good news is I already have most of this fic written. Also, in regards to comments, I try to respond to every comment I get. I really do love getting feedback from you guys! ^^
> 
> Anyway, without further adieu, I bring you chapter one!

It’s no surprise to Dib that, even after seven years of failure, Zim is still trying to take over the world.

After seven long years of being his enemy (even though now they were more along the lines of reluctant friends), he came to learn a lot about the alien, and if there was one thing that he knew for sure, it was that Zim didn’t know the definition of the words “quit” or “give up”. He was relentless, hatching one ridiculous scheme right after the other. If one plan failed, the next would come to take its place.

Yet every time, Dib has successfully managed to stop it. (Okay, he couldn’t take _all of the credit,_ because there were times when Zim had saved the Earth from his _own_ stupid plans). But for the most part, the only reason that the human race hadn’t been either destroyed or enslaved was thanks to Dib, and to Zim’s own idiocy. And the fact that he’s still received _no credit_ for _any of it_ eats at him to this day. Sure, heroes don’t do what they do for the credit, but Dib has stopped seeing himself as a hero and more as a guy just doing a job, since it was clear that no one else was going to do it. And he’s not gonna lie, it’d be nice to, just once, hear someone say “Wow Dib, thanks for saving the human race”. Or something along those lines.

Throughout his years of battling with Zim, he’s also learned that one of two things is true: either Zim is _really good_ at hiding his identity, or the human race is just… _really fucking stupid_ . And he knows that Zim is not, in fact, good at hiding his alien identity. At all. His skin is fucking green. He has _no ears._ The fact that anyone can even _question it_ is honestly astonishing to Dib. Zim probably could’ve picked from a million other, better disguises, but went with a stupid wig and stupid contacts because… well, he’s stupid. But the human race is definitely ten times stupider, because the fact that no one can tell that Zim is an alien from a mile away is just downright amazing to Dib. And not in the good way.

Of course, Gaz knows. Sure, she’s never really believed in the paranormal like he did, but even she could see that Zim was an alien. The problem was that she just didn’t really care.

_“He could destroy THE WORLD, Gaz.”_

_“So? Let him, the human race sucks anyways.”_

_“How can you say that?”_

_"It’s not like he’s actually gonna be able to do it, since you’re obsessing over him all the time.”_

_“I-I am not! I’m merely keeping an eye on him. That’s sort of my job as his arch nemesis.”_

_"Uh-huh. And besides, Zim’s too stupid to actually succeed in taking over the world.”_

It was only _years_ later when Dib was starting to see that perhaps Gaz was right. Sure, Zim could _maybe_ get away with killing a few thousand people, _maybe_ taking over a city or two, but realistically speaking, his idiotic projects could never be enough to successfully take down seven billion humans. Zim had the technology, no doubt about it, he just lacked the skills.

He had to give Zim _some_ credit, because some of his plans might have actually succeeded if Dib hadn’t done anything. But Dib doubted that Zim would be able to keep control of Earth for long, if he ever _did_ succeed. Some more powerful aliens would come along and take it from him just because they could. Earth would become a product on the market for invasion.

As a child, Dib saw himself as some sort of hero, savior of the Earth, and craved the attention he was deprived of during his childhood. And now, Dib realized that the only one who ever _gave him_ that attention was Zim. Zim took him seriously, saw him as a threat, and actively fought against him to protect himself. Now, however, it felt more like a game to him than anything, especially since Zim’s plans were less about taking over the Earth and more about getting back at Dib. It was like cat and mouse, one always chasing after the other. Yet even when they had both come within mere seconds of killing the other, they could never complete the job.

If Zim _really_ wanted to kill Dib, he could’ve done it by now. Besides, the alien had already stated (rather indirectly, but still) that Dib was what made his plans entertaining, and without him, he simply didn’t see the point.

And as for Dib, he had stopped trying to get the world to see Zim for what he really was. It was clear that the human race was choosing to turn a blind eye. Whether it be out of ignorance or fear he wasn’t sure, but it didn’t really matter anymore. Now, he was just doing his job, playing the game like it’s meant to be played because _Zim. Never. Gives . Up._

Dib would admire that about him, if he weren’t a crazy alien.

He wondered if Zim himself had finally realized that his plans were growing more and more ridiculous as the years passed, if that was even possible. Probably not, since they kept on coming, but Dib had realized that Zim’s plans were more focused on him than they ever had been before. His hatred for Dib seemed to get to him so much that he felt the need to make separate plans for the sole purpose of killing him. The inner child in him was both overjoyed and strangely flattered at the thought.

However, despite his seemingly natural hatred of Zim, he had always been secretly fascinated with his species and his alien technology. He wanted to know everything about the Irken race. Of course, Zim wouldn’t tell him, but Dib had been able to get a few things out of him that he wasn’t really able to hide. There was his aversion to meat and his allergies to most human food (except waffles, for some strange reason). There was also his reaction to water, as it was acidic to Irken skin.

There was Tak’s ship, which yes, he was _still_ working on. He had already worked out most of the kinks, but with Tak’s fiery personality being pre-downloaded onto the ship, it was a work in progress. Most days, the ship wouldn’t even let Dib come near it. He had to shut down the mainframe to do any sort of work on it.

He was hoping that, with enough work and preparation, he could get it ready for a journey across the stars. Of course, journeying into space for a nice vacation would probably be impossible, as Zim would most likely be right behind him, trying desperately to take him down.

_Must he try and take all the joy from my life?_

Speaking of _joy._

It was graduation day.

Today, he was graduating from high school.

It was almost like a dream.

He was worried for a while that he wouldn’t make it through school, as his never-ending battle with Zim put both a physical and mental strain on him. There were times when he seriously considered quitting to turn ‘chasing after Zim’ into a full-time gig. His father would’ve had a fit, however, because if there was one thing it was adamant about, it was school.

_“Education is the future, and no child of mine is going to live in a world without a proper education!”_

Surprisingly, Zim was graduating today too. Not that he really cared much; he wasn’t a resident of this planet so graduating high school really wouldn’t mean all that much to him. Dib was shocked that he had actually bothered to complete school all the way, as he claimed that he was just in school to “observe”. Dib had asked him about it once, during their sophomore year when they were ( _again)_ stuck in most of the same classes.

_“Why the hell are you still in school anyway? I thought you said you were just ‘observing’.”_

_"Stupid Dib, I’ve not yet completed my observations. Besides, I have to be able to keep a constant eye on you, in case you once again try to sabotage one of my brilliant plans.”_

Contrary to what Dib would have expected, as time passed, Zim actually started to try in school. And as much as he hated to admit it, he was actually pretty fucking smart. Zim passed his classes with flying colors. He couldn’t understand what was suddenly motivating Zim to care about how he did in school, but it had started to piss him off. And so, not long after that, their rivalry had spread to that of an academic one, with Dib doing his best to outdo Zim in all of his subjects.

_“I don’t get it. You’re not even from Earth! How do you know so much about Earth stuff?!”_

_“Easy Dib-stink, I pay attention.”_

_"No you don’t! You just sit there mumbling about how much you hate us all and that you want to go home.”_

_“So do you!”_

_“…Touché.”_

He never did find out how Zim did it, but at this point, he didn’t really care. He was graduating today. He was in way too good of a mood to let anything bother him. He was just hoping and praying to whatever gods were out there that Zim didn’t fuck this up for him. For once, he wanted something in his life to go normally. Zim could start the fucking apocalypse if he wanted to, it just had to wait until _after_ Dib walked off that stage with his freaking diploma, damn it.

_“Attention all seniors, please report to the main lobby at this time.”_

Show time.

He followed his classmates out the door in a single file line, and surprise surprise, there was none other than Zim behind him, that usual scowl ever present on his stupid green face. He tried to pay the alien no mind, as he wanted to take in the sight of his high school for the very last time. But he couldn’t help but be on high alert. Zim could easily have something planned for today, and he wanted to be prepared in case he had to save the world _again._

Truth be told, while the high school was dingy and gross and only brought Dib horrid memories of bullying and exclusion, he was going to miss it. It gave him a sense of belonging, a sense of responsibility (other than saving the world from Zim). And without that, he almost felt… empty.

That stupid, nasally voice that he unfortunately knew all too well brought him out of his reverie. “Dib-human!”

He heaved a heavy sigh, intent on ignoring the small Irken. He leaned up against the wall as he waited alongside his classmates to be called outside for the ceremony.

“Helloooooooo, Dib-human, are you ignoring me?! How dare you ignore Zim!”

“My name’s not ‘Dib-human’. It’s just Dib,” Dib coolly reminded him, not bothering to spare the alien a glance.

Zim waved a dismissive hand. “Whatever. You are familiar with humans and their filthy customs, correct?”

“Yeah, and your point?”

“Inform me of what’s going on today. Why am I being forced to wear this _hideous_ attire?” The small alien flapped his arms, the sleeves of his black gown covering his hands entirely. _This_ managed to catch Dib’s attention, and when he looked down at the alien flapping his arms wildly, he couldn’t help but chuckle. Despite the fact that Zim had grown considerably since they were kids, Dib still towered over him, and that gown was far too big for him.

“It’s graduation, you idiot. Today’s our last day of school.”

Zim’s demeanor seemed to change entirely. His eyes went wide with surprise. “Last… day? You mean it ends?”

“Of course it ends; no one goes to school forever.”

“…I see.”

Dib opened his mouth to threaten the alien, to warn him that if he tried anything, he would seriously fuck him up, but decided against it, not wanting to give him any ideas. Perhaps, and this was just a thought, but perhaps Zim really didn’t have any evil plans for today. Perhaps he could rest easy.

“That still doesn’t explain this _gown._ And this stupid _hat._ This… _thingy_ is hanging in my face!” Zim gestured to the tassel with an annoyed huff. Since the hat came so far down on his head, the tassel was sitting right by his chin.

“It’s just tradition, Zim. It’s what we wear for the ceremony.”

“Ceremony? What kind of ceremony?”

Dib picked up on the fearful tone in his voice. “We’re just getting our diplomas. You walk on the stage when your name is called, grab your diploma, shake a few hands, and sit back down. No big deal.”

“Shake… hands? You mean engage in physical contact with disgusting humans? No thanks. You can keep your dee-plo-ma. I don’t want it.”

Dib shrugged. “Suit yourself. But you might as well just do it, I mean, you’ve come this far already. In fact, I think you’ve accomplished more ‘human things’ anyway.”

Apparently, that was the wrong thing to say.

“How _dare you,”_ he snarled, glaring up at Dib dangerously from underneath the rim of his grad cap. “How dare you insinuate that I am anything even remotely _close_ to a human?! The Irkens are a proud, great race, far superior to humans and every other race in the galaxy! And I won’t stand for a vile human insulting _my people-“_

“Easy, easy!” Dib threw his hands up defensively. “I’m not trying to start a fight right now, jeez. How the hell was I insulting your people? All I said was that you’re becoming more and more-“

“Irkens could never be anywhere _near_ the disgusting filth known as human beings. I-“

“All seniors, please report to the football field for the ceremony.”

Zim cursed under his breath, probably in the Irken language as Dib didn’t recognize it, and pointed a gloved finger up at him. “This isn’t over. We will finish this discussion later.”

* * *

So far, the ceremony had gone on without incident.

They were reading down the list of names. They were going in alphabetical order, so Dib had a little ways to go before he would be called up to walk the stage. He had to admit, he wasn’t really as nervous as he thought he would be. He had imagined all sorts of nightmare scenarios in his head. What if he tripped and fell? What if his name didn’t get called? What if no one clapped for him when he got his diploma? And of course, the worst of them all, what if Zim attacked during the ceremony?

However, Zim seemed relatively quiet. _Too quiet,_ in fact. Something was definitely up.

“You’re _staring_ , Dib-stink.”

Dib blinked. Had he been staring? “Sorry.”

Zim narrowed his eyes. “I understand that you feel compelled to stare at me, my face is rather enthralling, but I can’t think of my next evil plan if you’re staring. It’s weird.”

Dib nearly choked on his own saliva. The absolute _nerve-!_

“That is _so not_ why I was staring. But wait, why are you thinking of your next evil plan _right now?!”_

Zim shrugged. “Dunno, I’m bored and it’ll be a while before they call my name. You said they do it by names, correct?”

“Yes- wait, Zim _what?_ What even _is_ your last name?”

“Most Irkens have no surnames. Only elite Irken soldiers are given the privilege of a surname.”

“I thought you _were_ an elite Irken soldier.”

It was Zim’s turn to nearly choke, and he noticed that the Irken’s cheeks had taken on a light shade of purple. Was he… embarrassed? “I will be! I just have to prove myself to the Tallest, and then after they see my success, they will reward me with my rightful soldier status!”

He had met them before, and if Dib was being honest, they didn’t really seem like leaders. In fact, they didn’t seem to particularly care for Zim. Dib couldn’t really blame them. But in all honesty, Zim’s loyalty to them, even after all this time, was starting to become tiresome. Dib figured that the Tallest probably forgot about Zim, yet here he is, still babbling on about them. Did he still keep in touch with them?

_Probably._

“Dib Membrane.”

This was it. The moment he had been waiting for ever since he was a preschooler.

With one last glance down at Zim, he rose to his feet and made his way up to the stage. He knew that mostly everyone was looking up at him, but at that moment, he only felt one pair of eyes on him. He took his diploma, shook some hands, smiled a lot, before he quickly retreated off the stage.

If he weren’t at a formal event, he would’ve jumped for joy.

“So this is a ‘dee-plo-ma’?” Zim questioned once Dib had sat back down, gesturing to the folder in his hand.

“Yeah,” Dib replied, “you’ll see once you get yours. Basically it says you completed the most basic form of education.”

Zim smirked at that. “Yes, human education is no match for the intelligence of Zim!”

 _Clearly,_ Dib didn’t say. Zim had, shockingly, graduated with honors, which was reserved for students that exceeded the expected requirements. Dib had as well, but still, the fact that an alien was able to graduate high school at all, let alone graduate with honors, was quite surprising. And infuriating, for some reason.

“Zim grows impatient,” he grumbled after a few moments, “I have more important things I could be doing right now.”

Dib waved him off. He got what he needed, after all. “Then go. I don’t really care if you stay or not.”

Zim mumbled something about “insolent humans” before slumping back into his seat, folding his arms over his chest.

After a grueling half hour of names, Zim was pleased to hear his name finally called from the bottom of the list.

“Zim Invader.”

It took all Dib had not to burst into laughter.

 _"Invader?_ That’s the last name you picked?!” he asked through snorts.

“Silence! I am Zim, the great invader! It is only fitting that such a term be my given surname!” And with that, the Irken marched his way up onto the stage, swiping his diploma out of the principal’s hands. Without shaking any hands, he hurried off the stage, holding up his diploma high for Dib to see. “You see Dib? Your ‘high school’ was no match for Zim!” He stuck his pointed tongue out at Dib before proceeding to turn around, fiddling with the communication device on his wrist. “Gir! I grow tired of this place, come get me!”

Dib could hear Gir’s loud, robotic voice even from the other side of the field. “Yes Master!”

Gir arrived to retrieve Zim _after_ the ceremony, and quite frankly, Dib wasn’t sure if he should be thankful for that or not. His eleven year old self would be screaming at him right now, as this was the perfect time for Zim to make his escape without being noticed by anyone. However, he really was in way too good of a mood to care. Just for today, Zim could do whatever the fuck he wanted.

He watched as he hopped onto the little robot’s back and the two of them were off, leaving a trail of smoke as they went. He guessed that, yet again, he was the only one who noticed.

Unsurprisingly, his father hadn’t been there to attend his graduation. He claimed that he had really tried to make it, but there was an important meeting for today that he said he couldn’t miss. However, Gaz was there, despite how uninterested she appeared to be. What was surprising to Dib was that she didn’t appear to have her GameSlave with her, or her cellphone.

“Congrats, I guess,” she said in a monotone voice, trying her best to sound indifferent as usual.

“Thanks. I’m glad you came.”

Gaz rolled her eyes. “Dad practically forced me to go.”

Dib merely laughed. Figures. “Right, well, how about I take you to that new pizza place that just opened up? We can celebrate. I’ll pay.”

Gaz seemed to like the sound of that. So without bidding goodbye to any of his classmates, Dib drove away from his past and towards his future.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: So, I know it's a bit soon to be saying this but there is already a sequel in the works. ;; I actually didn't intend for that to happen, but as I was writing it, I was just like 'yeah, this needs a sequel asap'. So, seeing as how I've already finished this one, I'll be getting to work on that shortly!

"Master, what is that thingy on yous head?"

Zim, realizing that he had forgotten to take off his disguise, tossed the hat and the wig onto the floor. "The humans called it a 'cap and gown'. Today was a very important human ceremony, Gir. They called it 'graduation'."

The little robot, still in his dog disguise, cocked his head to the side. "Ooohh! I don't get it."

"I don't either," Zim replied as he pulled the gown off, revealing his traditional Irken uniform. "But thanks to this 'dee-plo-ma', I am now free of that wretched school!"

"Oh, Master doesn't have school anymore?! Yay! That means Master can come play!"

"No Gir, it means that I now have more time to focus on my new plans!"

The dog disguise was gone now, and Zim found himself face to face with Gir's wide, unblinking eyes. "Master, are you sure you still wants to take over the world and stuff?"

Zim frowned. "You dare question our mission, Gir?!"

"N-No sir!"

"You must remember what we were put on this planet for," Zim told him, his tone stern. "We are invaders! Well,  _I_  am an invader, and you are my servant!"

Gir's eyes briefly flashed red as he saluted respectfully. "Yes Master, I obey!"

"Good. Now then, Gir, my next evil plan… next evil plan…" He hummed thoughtfully, tapping his chin.

His so-called servant clearly wasn't interested in listening. "Imma make taquitos! Does Master want some?"

"Silence Gir! I need quiet so I can concentrate!"

The robot giggled childishly and trotted into the kitchen. "Oooookay, then! I'll make quiet taquitos!"

Evil plan… evil plan… what exactly  _was_  his next evil plan?

What was with him? Usually he could come up with new plans nearly instantaneously. Perhaps he just needed some inspiration.

Or maybe…

He's had a stressful day, what with this whole "graduation" thing, not to mention that the Dib was acting strangely today. Actually, he'd been acting strangely for quite a while now. Perhaps he was just on edge. He couldn't blame him, as he was feeling rather jumpy himself as of late. He just needed to relax. Not for long, he was an Invader after all, and he wouldn't be caught lazing around. But even Irkens needed their rest, and he couldn't invade Earth if he wasn't in pique physical and mental condition.

A few minutes later, Zim was suddenly met with a lapful of taquitos and robot. "Here ya go Master!"

"Gir! You do not need to sit on me to eat taquitos! Get off me!"

"Sorry!" Gir immediately scooted over to the other side of the couch. "Is Master gonna watch TV with me?"

"I suppose. Pick something entertaining. And no Scary Monkey show."

Gir pouted, sniffling. "Okay…"

Gir eventually settled on what he  _thought_  was a 'comedy' film. Zim quickly discovered that it was intended to be a horror movie, but Gir was right. This movie  _was_  rather funny.

"Foolish humans and their need for sleep! If they weren't so weak, this Freddy Krueger would be unable to murder them in their dreams!"

"M-Master, I'm scared! I'm scared! Freddy's gonna get me! He's gonna get me Master! Don't let him get me!" Gir had once again leapt right onto Zim's lap, and although he didn't look it, he was rather heavy.

"Gir! It's  _just_ a movie!"

"B-But Master!" The robot was shaking, sniffling and crying hysterically. It was clear that he wasn't going to calm down until he was reassured somehow.

Gir was lucky that he was his servant. Sometimes he wondered if he did this on purpose.

"There there, Gir, I won't let Freddy Krueger get you."

"Y-You won't?"

"No. Now please get off me before you suffocate me."

He complied, clambering off of his master with a sniffle.

Zim couldn't help but feel a bit relieved. At least now with school out of the way, he would have a lot more free time to work on his plans. But this sudden time he had on his hands didn't mean he had an excuse to lie around. If anything, he had to work twice as hard now that his schedule was open.

Speaking of plans…

He tried to search his (genius, thank you very much) brain for something, anything to work with, but there was nothing, not a single noteworthy thing that he could come up with. His mind was far too muddled with Gir and the "graduation" events that had occurred today.

He shot a quick glance over at his robot servant, who was humming happily to himself while munching on a taquito. He guessed that he shouldn't worry too much, after all, he had all the time in the world. Okay, that wasn't  _exactly true-_ in fact, all of the other invaders had already succeeded. A long time ago, actually.

So what was holding him back?

"Computer!"

" _Yes?"_

"When did I first land on this filthy planet?"

" _About seven years ago in Earth time, sir."_

"How… there's no way that's true! Seven years… I should have this planet underneath my boot right now!"

" _Well, you don't."_

Zim huffed. "Yes,  _thank you_  computer. I am aware of that. But…  _why?_ Are you sure that estimate is correct?"

" _Yes. I will also point out that Irk time moves differently than Earth time. To Irkens, seven years is nothing, but to humans, it's a very long time."_

"So that is why the Dib has gotten so much taller in such a short amount of time… interesting. Then… if that's the case, then there's something I've been missing… something I've been doing wrong… but what is it? All of my plans so far have been brilliant, so why do they keep failing?"

" _That would likely be because of the Dib human."_

Zim felt that same rage bubble up inside him once more, the rage he felt every time he so much as  _thought_ of that miserable, insufferable, half-wit human. He hated all humans, but Dib Membrane was by far the worst.

"That impudent human… always ruining my plans..! Why haven't I killed him yet?!"

" _All of your attempts to annihilate Dib have been unsuccessful."_

"WHY?!"

" _Probably because he's smarter than you."_

Zim grumbled an Irken curse under his breath.

" _I heard that."_

"Yeah whatever. The problem is Dib. Always, always Dib. If it weren't for him..! Damn him!"

"Master, that's a bad word!"

"Silence Gir!"

" _There is a plan that you constructed long ago, Master, but you never got to use it."_

"Huh? I had a plan?"

" _Yes, you asked me to record the details. Do you not remember?"_

Zim shrugged. "Nah, guess not." He jumped to his feet. "Gir, come with me to the lab. We have work to do."

Gir leaped off the couch, landing behind his master. "Coming!"

* * *

"So, what are you gonna do now?"

Surprised by the sudden question, Dib dropped his pizza crust back onto his plate, looking up at his sister. "Huh?"

"I asked you a question. I asked what you're gonna do now that you're not in school anymore."

"Oh… I'm just surprised you asked. I didn't think you cared."

Gaz shrugged, taking a rather large bite out of her pizza slice. "I don't, but since dad isn't here and all, I figured that's the kind of question he'd ask."

Dib deadpanned. "Dad paid you to be here, didn't he?"

Gaz met his eyes, but said nothing, which Dib took as a "yes".

He sighed. Figures. It's not like she'd willingly care about anything related to her brother anyway. "Well, not that you really care, but I do have a few after high school plans."

She idly took a sip of her soda. "Are you still gonna keep fighting with Zim?"

"Well, I guess so. I mean if I don't, he might actually destroy the world."

"You really believe that? It's been seven years, just give it up already. Get a hobby, or a girlfriend or something."

"Saving the world  _is_ my hobby, Gaz. I don't really do much of anything else anymore."

Gaz waved him off. "Yeah yeah, well, if you wanna keep playing with him, then I'm not gonna stop you."

He was a little annoyed at his life's work being referred to as 'playing'. Just a little bit, however, because deep down, he was starting to come to the realization that his bitter rivalry with Zim was becoming more and more like a game every day. Still, he couldn't help but play it off as something serious and important. "It's serious business, actually. But if the day finally comes where I do expose Zim, I want to try and become a professional paranormal investigator."

This, shockingly, caught his sister's attention. "You really think you're gonna make money doing that?"

Dib shrugged. "It's worth a shot. If I get into the industry, it'll be my chance to prove to the world that I'm not insane!"

"Look, I get that Zim is an alien and all that, but I think fighting with him  _has_ made you crazy."

"Yeah, well,  _you'll see."_

"Mmhm."

Silence fell between them again as Dib struggled to think of what to say to her, especially when Gaz really couldn't care less, and was only here for the free food.

"I was thinking that, since I'm gonna have more free time, I could start picking you up from school. I could pick you up before lunch on Friday's, and take you here. If you want."

She eyed him warily from beneath her bangs. "Do you want something out of me?"

"Wha- no! I'm just trying to be nice, really! But fine, if you don't want me to, then I won't." He grumbled something about "ungrateful sisters" under his breath, folding his arms over his chest.

"I… didn't say that."

Dib opened his mouth to thank her, but decided against it. He didn't need to say any more. That was one thing, probably the  _only_  thing that he adored about his little sister. She listened, even when it seemed like she didn't. And she understood without much being said.

"Just don't get me involved in your stupid alien hunting stuff. I don't want to have to come rescue you  _again_."

He laughed sheepishly. "Sorry about that. Don't worry about me, I know Zim's base like the back of my hand now. If I get caught, I'll find my way out."

The silence was then broken by the sound of Dib's cellphone ringing. Strange. No one ever really called him.

"Hello?"

" _Hello son, it's me! I'm sorry I wasn't able to make it to your graduation, really, I am. It's just that something came up and-"_

"It's fine dad, I get it. You don't have to apologize."

" _Oh, thank goodness. But really, congratulations. As a reward for all your hard work in school, I'll come home early tomorrow night, and we'll do some father-son things. How does that sound?"_

"Oh… yeah, that sounds great! Um… I guess I'll see you then?"

" _Yes! Until then, Gaz, don't let him out of your sight!"_

"Uh, dad, you're not on speaker."

" _Oh. Right. Well, I have to get back to the meeting! Bye!"_

It should be " _Dib, don't let Gaz out of your sight."_ How did it end up being the other way around?

_Because you've been dedicating the past seven years of your life to killing an alien._ Ah, right.

He heaved a deep, long sigh. How was he going to manage college  _and_ saving the world?

* * *

"Computer! I require my ingenious plan!"

The document appeared on the large monitor. It was right there, in bold print, every detail listed out in perfect order. As Zim read over it, he felt himself growing more and more excited. Why hadn't he done this sooner? This is genius! This is  _foolproof!_

" _You said that about your last one hundred and eighty seven plans, Master."_

Had he said that out-loud? "Silence!" There was no doubt about it. This was the perfect plan. "Computer, why did I never follow through with such a flawless plan?"

" _It was a plan that you forgot about, it seems."_

Why was he forgetting so much lately? "Well, regardless, we have a new evil plan! Gir!"

Gir was at his side nearly instantaneously, saluting respectfully. "I made cake! LOOK!"

Zim cringed as the dessert was shoved in his face. He pushed it aside, causing it to splatter onto the floor. "Yes, that's nice Gir. You can eat cake later. I need you to establish a communication link with the almighty Tallest! Today is Probing Day yet again, and I have the ultimate presentation! This plan  _will not fail!_ "

Cyan eyes flashed red as Gir scurried over to the computer, giggling happily.

_Now then, where did I put those mini-robots..?_

"I love this show," Gir said with a happy sigh as he watched the static rolling across the monitor. After a couple moments, the image of his two Irken leaders suddenly appeared onscreen. They seemed to be in the middle of something, and had not yet taken notice to the incoming transmission.

_"Looks like you've done well, Invader Larb,"_  Tallest Red stated, typing away on a small tablet.  _"You pass inspection!"_

_"Thank you my Tallest, I will continue to do my best!"_

Tallest Purple waved him off with a sigh. _"Yes yes, that's wonderful. Next!"_

_"My Tallest, you have an incoming transmission from Earth."_

_"...Put it on hold for now."_

_"Yes sirs."_

At the sound of his Tallest's voice, Zim's antennae perked up. He gathered the materials for the presentation into his arms before rushing across the lab. "M-My Tallest, you must forgive my lack of organization, but I  _just_  came up with this plan. I can assure you that despite how things may look, I am  _beyond ready_ for my inspection."

_"Invader Skoodge is next on the list,"_  said Tallest Red.  _"Should we even bother?"_

Tallest Purple cringed a bit.  _"I don't want to, but considering that he did successfully conquer Blorch, he's owed a Probing Day inspection."_

_"Ugh,"_  Tallest Red grumbled,  _"fine. Put him through."_

Zim narrowed his eyes, confused. "Uh, my Tallest, can you hear me? It's me, Zim! Hey! I can hear you, why can't I see you anymore?"

No answer.

_"Hello my Tallest! As you can see, I am more than prepared for my Probing Day inspection."_

"Is that Invader Skoodge?" Zim asked with a scoff. "Please! He was pathetic in the academy, there's no way he actually conquered Blorch!"

_"...Whoa,"_  Tallest Red murmured, astounded.  _"You actually conquered planet Blorch."_

_"Yeah, I know,"_  Skoodge replied, grinning proudly.  _"It was pretty awesome."_

_"...Right. Well… we'll have an inspector sent out to Blorch to analyze your progress shortly."_

Zim didn't like being ignored this long, especially not for something pathetic like  _Invader Skoodge._ "Gir, something's wrong." He frantically began pressing keys on the keyboard. "They can't seem to hear or see me. What did you do?"

"I called them just like you said!" Gir insisted.

"Well then why can't-  _oh."_

"Oh?"

Zim chuckled as he relaxed, slumping back into his seat. "We're just on  _hold._ Very well my Tallest, I shall wait!"

_"Looks like Zim's last on the list,"_  Tallest Purple mumbled with a disappointed sigh.  _"Do we really have to? We don't, right? He's not really an invader after all."_

Zim froze. Had he…  _heard that correctly?_

"Um, sirs, he's  _still on the line…"_

_"Uh… I suppose we don't really have to. But I kinda wanna see what stupid plan he's got up his sleeve this time."_  Tallest Red snorted with laughter.  _"Okay, p-put him through…"_

The call was put through and the image of his Irken leaders finally appeared on the monitor once again. Tallest Purple had somehow managed to keep a straight face, but Tallest Red was snorting loudly with poorly concealed laughter, struggling to stay upright.

"Z-Zim," Tallest Purple began, and even Zim could see that he was trying his best not to laugh, "a-as you know, today is… Probing Day."

"Y-Yes," Zim cleared his throat, attempting to brush off what he had heard. The Tallest were funny like that, they often liked to make jokes. "A-As you can see, I'm prepared to present my latest plan to destroy the humans!" He unraveled a rolled up lab plan. "Behold, the microbots! As you can see, they'll be disguised as a vaccine for a 'new strain of influenza', a common human disease. These microbots are programmed to take control of their host at my command-"

The Tallest's raucous laughter interrupted him. The two clutched onto each other, giggling hysterically, tears leaking from the corners of their eyes. "O-Oh man, this is good!" Tallest Red wiped at the corner of his eye, his laughter finally dying down long enough to speak clearly.

"D-Did you see the tiny little robots-!" Tallest Purple jeered, rearing back into another fit of laughter.

Zim looked back and forth between the two of them, eyes wide, antennae perked. "Uh… my Tallest?"

Their laughter reverberated throughout the base, causing something indescribable to rise up in his squeedlyspooch. What was wrong with them? Sure, the Tallest liked to jest and joke and poke fun, but if Zim didn't know any better, then he'd almost think that they were laughing at…

"Jeez, how long have you been on that planet anyway Zim?" Tallest Red asked once he regained his bearings.

"S-Seven years Earth time, my Tallest," Zim admitted, cheeks burning with shame. He knew that the amount of time he'd wasted on this rock was abysmal, he should have had this planet taken care of a long time ago. The other invaders were already awaiting the Armada, meanwhile Zim hadn't even enslaved a single human yet!

Tallest Purple narrowed his eyes at Zim. "Seven years Earth time? Compared to the other invaders, that amount of time is… sad. You know Invader Skoodge was the first one to successfully conquer a planet? Invader  _Skoodge!_ Besides you, he's the shortest invader in the academy!"

"Y-Yes, but-"

Another fit of loud, noisy laughter echoed throughout the lab. Zim felt his cheeks burn further, his squeedlyspooch tying itself into knots.

"Th-The best part is…" Tallest Purple said through snickers, placing his arm around his co-leader's neck and pulling him closer. "He's not even an  _invader…_ and we  _still gave him a mission anyway…_ and the  _shortest Irken_ in the invader program conquered a planet before him!"

Tallest Red's laughter died instantly, leaving Tallest Purple laughing hysterically, falling backwards onto the couch. Tallest Red looked between Zim's flabbergasted expression and the other Irken leader giggling like a smeet on the couch, awkwardly clearing his throat in hopes that it would tip him off. The other Irken leader continued to laugh until finally Tallest Red roughly elbowed him in the side,  _hard_ , and yanked him up so that he was standing upright. Tallest Purple wiped his eyes and cleared his throat as well, attempting to act serious.

"Way to go," Tallest Red mumbled dejectedly. "Now he knows."

Tallest Purple, however, was not nearly as put off by the sudden revelation. "Oh please, he was gonna find out eventually, right?"

"No,  _actually_ , we talked about this. He wasn't supposed to find out for the next two hundred years!" Tallest Red snapped back.

Tallest Purple folded his arms over his chest. "Oh, so it's my fault, is it?"

"Yes, it is your fault!"

"No, it's  _your_ fault!" Tallest Purple jabbed a clawed finger at his armored chest. "I knew this was a bad idea from the start! You and your stupid plans! We should've told Zim from the beginning that he was defective, maybe then Operation Impending Doom One never would've failed!"

"Hey, don't act all innocent, you were in on it too!"

"Yeah, only cause I thought it'd be  _fun._ But look at him," Tallest Purple gestured to where Zim stood, shell-shocked and silent. "You broke him!"

"No,  _you_ broke him!  _You_ spilled the beans!"

"This was your plan from the start!"

"Our plan, we do things together!"

"Quit trying to force me into taking some of the blame!"

"What blame? No one's blaming you!" Tallest Red sighed heavily. "Look, it's… a good thing. Zim, listen well."

Zim didn't do anything to acknowledge that he had heard his leader. His head was ducked low, his clouded eyes glued to the floor. His antennae fell limply on either side of his head, oddly still.

"We never intended for you to find out this soon, but since  _someone_ has a big mouth… ugh. Whatever. Point is, if you ever contact us again, we won't hesitate to kill you. From here on out, by order of the Almighty Tallest, you are exiled to planet Earth, never to return to Irk ever again."

"Yeah, what he said!" Tallest Purple added.

"Your crimes are worthy of execution," Tallest Red continued, "so be grateful that we've pardoned you. You are to live out the rest of your days on that pathetic rock. Even if you successfully invade it, it won't matter. Your 'mission' is over."

"Yeah, what he said! Again!"

Tallest Red glared pointedly at him. "Right… well, okay, are we done here? I think we're done here."

"Let's go get something to eat, I'm starving," Tallest Purple whined.

"You're  _always_ hungry. Anyways, see ya later Zim. Or not. Hopefully not."

And with that, the transmission feed died. The screen went black and Zim was left alone in the darkness of his base.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Yes, I know, the dreaded cliche 'the tallest tell zim' fic. but hear me out for a sec
> 
> 1) I found that out AFTER I started writing this. I'm new to the fanbase so I had no idea that it was such a popular fic concept. 
> 
> 2) come on guys, he deserves to know the truth! 
> 
> anyway... not the most original concept in the world, but I really hope you guys will still give it a chance, because I'm pretty happy with how it turned out!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: My updates have been rather quick, and I plan to keep it that way. I'd like to get this finished before my other two classes start.
> 
> Enjoy chapter three!

"Gaz, something's not right."

"Mm."

"It's been a week, and Zim hasn't done anything! He hasn't tried to kill me or take over the world!"

"Yeah, that's great."

Dib frowned, annoyed by his sister's dismissal of him. Although, he should be used to this by now. He would go on a long rant about Zim, and Gaz would pretend she was listening by halfheartedly muttering something in response. "Hey, are you even listening?"

Gaz shrugged. "More or less."

Dib flopped down onto the couch beside her. "I just don't get it! Usually he's tearing down my door by now, but he's nowhere to be seen! He hasn't even called me to insult me like usual!"

"Since when did Zim get a cellphone? And why does he have your number?" she asked.

"Long story," Dib replied with an exasperated sigh.

"Not interested then."

He had been enamored with smartphones when they first came out, and was thrilled that now he could do more things on his phone rather than doing it all on his computer. It was especially helpful considering his desired line of work.

" _What is that device you're carrying, Dib-stink? Is it a weapon?!"_

" _What- no, it's not a weapon! It's a cellphone, see?"_

" _Cellphone?"_

" _Yeah, it's like a communicator. You use it to call people or send them text messages."_

" _Such primitive Earth technology! Irkens are ages ahead of humans in every aspect!"_

Zim had seen Dib playing games on his phone during class, and eventually, Dib figured that that was what encouraged Zim to want one as well. Rather than buy one, Zim had created an exact replica of Dib's phone. Since then, Dib wasn't sure if he had ever seen the Irken without it. Dib's not exactly sure how Zim got his number, as he'd never willingly give it to him, but one day Zim had called him just to list off insults at him, and it soon became a near weekly occurrence. Dib was  _really close_ to blocking his number (which he's not even sure how he has, considering that the phone is an alien-made replica and therefore shouldn't  _have_  service). He decided to stop questioning Zim a long time ago, as it was clear he wouldn't ever get those answers.

At least, until now. Because something was up, and Dib was going to find out what.

"Dib, did you drink the last soda again?!"

Dib hadn't even noticed that she'd gotten up, as he was far too wrapped up in his own thoughts (yet again). "Um…"

Gaz huffed and rolled her eyes, slamming the refrigerator door shut. "You have to go get us some more sodas."

"Yeah yeah, I'll get some when I go shopping tonight."

More often than not, it was Dib taking care of the house. His father was hardly around to do it, so ever since he was old enough to take care of himself, he was buying groceries and making dinner for both himself and Gaz, and occasionally his father. Gaz was surprisingly good about chores and had been self-sufficient from a young age, so Dib didn't  _have_  to worry about her too much.

Still, that didn't stop him from worrying. It was hard not to when there was an alien that could destroy the Earth any day living in your town.

But, said alien was being awfully quiet as of late, and it was up to Dib to find out why.

_Just you wait, Zim. I'll find out what you're up to._

* * *

"Master, is you okay? You haven't moved in…" Gir paused to count. "Seven days!"

The SIR unit received no response from his master, who sat limply in the chair in front of the computer desk.

"Master!" Gir placed a tiny, metal hand on Zim's shoulder, roughly shaking him. "Master, you're not dead, are you?! Please don't be dead! Master, Master!"

"Gir…" Zim finally choked out, "not dead. Fine."

"You don't look fine," Gir noted. Zim couldn't help but notice that that was rather observant of him. Observing was part of his job, but Gir had never been very good at that.

Has he really not moved in seven days?

Oh... that's right. He didn't have a mission anymore.

It still felt like a bad dream. Not that he would know, since he didn't need sleep. But he had tried it once, had a few nightmares, and decided that he didn't like it. At all. This, however, was real, very real, as the darkness and empty solitude of his base reminded him. His Tallest, his dear leaders, betraying him? Manipulating him? Not possible. They were just and powerful. They were righteous and strong and ruled with an iron fist, and led the Irken race towards universal conquest. Defective or not, Zim could not allow himself to believe that his Tallest could be anything but wonderful.

But… what other way was there to interpret their words? They said his name, and were speaking directly to him. They even threatened him, like they didn't want to hear from him anymore. How could that be? He had always thought that his Tallest viewed him as a soldier. Was he not owed that status for venturing to Earth, a mysterious planet that no Irken had ever heard of?

" _He's not even an invader."_

" _The shortest Irken in the invader program conquered a planet before him!"_

His species prided height above anything else. Height equals status. And Zim had always known that he was small, ever since he was a little smeet. Many other Irkens had taunted him for it all throughout his youth, yet he had never let his diminutive stature stand in his way. In fact, if it hadn't been for that… ahem,  _incident_ with operation Impending Doom One, he might have achieved soldier status then. At least, that's what he had thought. But now he was starting to suspect that even if he had successfully completed his training, he never would've made it in. He would've been tormented for his pathetic height and banished. And that was becoming clearer and clearer to him by the day.

A broken Irken with a false mission. There was no planet to invade, no job to be done. And his Tallest, his leaders, wanted nothing to do with him anymore.

He had no purpose.

What's the point, if he cannot serve his Tallest? He certainly couldn't return to Irk, he'd be executed as soon as he set foot on the ground. But he couldn't stay here either, and live with a constant reminder of his failure. So where else could he go? What could he do? If he was not a soldier, than what was he?

"Master, is you okay? You look sad."

He looked down at his robot servant. Gir was looking back up at him, clearly confused, his head cocked to the side. It was a silly thought, Gir wasn't even a sentient being, yet he cried and laughed and acted just like a real, living person would.

And what about Gir, his servant? His supposed 'special model'? Gir had been reduced from a special unit to a trash unit. He had always known Gir was different from the rest of the SIR units, but he never paid much mind to it, as (most of the time) Gir did what he was told. He was silly and reckless and downright stupid at times, but he'd be lying if he said he hadn't grown attached to him.

How ridiculous. Zim, an Irken, getting attached to a non-sentient robot.

Gir was all he had. On this alien planet, so far from his home, that was it. And now, his home was rejecting him as well. He was stranded, stuck between a rock and a hard place.

Is this what it's like to feel sadness? Was that this feeling? This deep, dark pit sinking deep into his squeedlyspooch… this cold, tight grip at his heart… was that sadness?

It had to be. There was no other explanation for this.

For the first time in his life, in all one hundred and sixty-eight years of his existence, Zim the Irken invader knew sadness. And he loathed it like he loathed any other emotion. It's not as though he was a stranger to them, after all. But he had never felt them in this capacity, in such a strong, passionate way. He hated it. But more than anything, he hated himself for allowing himself to fall victim to them.

"No, Gir, I don't think I am 'okay'."

A few moments of silence passed as Gir struggled to think of something to say. Which was strange in and of itself, Gir  _always_  had something to say, even when it wasn't relevant to the situation.

A sudden knock on the door brought Zim out of his reverie.

" _Important, intruder alert."_

"Computer, identify."

" _It is the Dib, Master."_

Dib. His arch nemesis. His greatest enemy and longtime rival. Dib's name used to ignite such a raging fire deep within him, where was that fire now?

_What the hell could he possibly want at a time like this?_

Without bothering to put on his disguise, he forced his heavy, aching limbs to move once more. He made his way to the elevator and rode back upstairs, slowly trudging over to the front door. He pulled it open a mere crack, glancing up at Dib irritably. "What do you want?"

Dib stared down at him, squinting his eyes as if he were confused. "Where's your disguise?"

"There's no need for me to put on my disguise around you, Dib-stink. Now go away, I'm busy."

For obvious reasons, Dib never did take kindly to being ignored. "You're not busy. It's been well over a week since you've tried to kill me. So something's up!"

Zim deadpanned. "Would you like me to kill you? That can be arranged."

"You could at least  _try._ You haven't talked to me all week. So that means… you're planning something, right?! You're planning something huge!"

"Even if I was, I certainly wouldn't tell  _you_  about it," Zim sneered. "I'm not in the mood to deal with you. Why don't you run along and go do human things?"

Taken aback by Zim's dismissal of him, Dib lunged forward to grab the door before it could be slammed in his face. "You could at least humor me a little! What was it you said before? That you always liked to tell me about your plans because I was the only one smart enough to understand your 'genius'?"

Annoyed, Zim suddenly pulled the door wide open, causing Dib to stumble forward into the living room. "That was then, this is now. You should know by now that Zim's brilliant plans are always top secret,  _especially_ to filthy humans like you. Now then, you have about ten seconds to leave before I splatter your guts all over the floor."

Dib rolled his eyes. "You can threaten me all you want, Zim, but we both know you won't-" He was interrupted by the barrel of an alien-looking gun pressing against his forehead. The sound of all sorts of weapons being loaded resounded throughout the room. A quick scan of the area made Dib suddenly aware of all of the artillery currently being aimed at him.

"I said  _ **leave!"**_  Zim demanded, his gloved finger hovering above the trigger.

There was a look in those alien eyes that Dib had never seen before, that he didn't quite recognize. It didn't fit him, Dib realized. He had never seen the alien look this way before. Nowadays, he hardly ever reacted so strongly to Dib's presence. He could pretty much walk right into Zim's house and get out unscathed.

He slowly staggered to his feet, his hands raised in the air in surrender. "Alright, I'm leaving. I'm leaving. But I will find out what you're-"

SLAM!

* * *

Something was definitely off with Zim.

Never in all his years of battling with Zim had he ever seen the alien make that face. It was so…  _unbecoming_  of him. Zim usually had two expressions, the bored scowl he wore at school, and his maniacal grin for when he was putting his stupid plans into action. But this, this was an entirely new expression, one that he never thought Zim was capable of.

Dib wasn't an expert on reading alien faces, but if he didn't know any better, he'd say that Zim almost looked… upset.

Zim's mood swings were constant; just about anything could switch around the alien's mood. He was either overly happy or overly angry. There was never any in between. But for the first time in seven years, Dib got to see what he thought could be another side to the alien. Certainly not a good side, there was nothing good about Zim, but there was definitely another side that he had yet to see.

Saving the world would have to wait. Dib's first priority was figuring out what's wrong with Zim.

But how could he do that? It wasn't exactly like he could just have a therapeutic talk with an alien. Dib was probably the last person Zim would ever open up to, if he would even open up to anyone. He briefly considered using Zim's servant Gir, but that robot would hardly be of any use, not to mention that there was no guarantee that he could keep Gir's loyalty long enough to properly interrogate Zim.

Perhaps it was related to his home planet. Maybe Dib could get some answers if he investigated his base?

That was easier said than done  _now_ , of course. After that little fiasco earlier, Zim was probably on high alert. Breaking in now would be no easy task, and Zim certainly wasn't inviting him over for tea and a chat any time soon.

_I'll wait. If I leave now, Zim will be expecting me. Right now… he seems a bit unpredictable, more than usual. I'll let whatever… 'this' is blow over._

* * *

"Master? Imma go out for a little while, 'kay? Wanna come?"

Zim didn't even bother to answer Gir, waving him off with an irritated huff.

With a heavy sigh, Gir scampered out the door. Zim had no idea when he'd be back, and frankly, at this point, he didn't really care.

He didn't see the point. He didn't see the point in  _any_ of this.

If there was no Earth mission, then why was he here? Why had the Tallest bothered with him at all? If all of what they said was true, if that were  _really_  the case, then he would've been banished at a young age. So why had his Tallest given him a "mission" at all? Was it amusing for them to see him try and fail over and over again?

The ever dutiful soldier in him was screaming at him for thinking something so idiotic. It was the part of him that wanted to live in denial, to keep on going like everything was fine. Like he still had a mission, like his Tallest were still expecting him to return to the Massive with planet Earth conquered. Perhaps that would be easier. But after hearing his leaders' cruel laughter echoing in his head over and over again on a constant loop, he found himself starting to come to a horrifying realization.

If he returned to Irk… he'd be killed.

All this time, he'd thought that he was a warrior. He was proud of his planet and his people. He proudly served his Tallest. He'd referred to himself as a high-ranking elite Irken, but all this time, he'd only been a defective outlaw. The mere thought of it sickened him.  _Zim_ , a defective?

Defectives were disgusting, an abomination to the Irken race. Defectives were usually a result of a malfunctioning PAK or an issue during the creation process. Those that are marked as defective have little to offer to the Irken Empire, and so if they are not killed, they are banished. He remembered that his Tallest had mentioned something about him being banished. His time at Foodcourtia… had that been banishment?

The fact that his Tallest would dare to group him in with such an inferior kind…

Zim felt a cold fear strike him right in his squeedlyspooch. He had just spoken negatively of his leaders. He had thought poorly of his dear Tallest. If he were back on Irk, and saying any of this out-loud, he'd be executed on the spot.

But he wasn't on Irk. He was here, on this stupid planet that has no relevance anymore because it was never a mission at all. His Tallest never believed in him. They never gave him a chance. They strung him along, toyed with him for their amusement until they had decided that they'd had enough. He had thought that his Tallest were the only ones that had ever seen his true worth, that saw past his height and perceived the true soldier within him.

But they hadn't, had they? They wanted him dead ever since the day he came to be. This was just their way of getting rid of him.

It was just like Tallest Red had told him long ago, back when he was first banished to Foodcourtia. How could he have forgotten?

_There is never any hope for a defective Irken._

The world started to spin again. His chest felt hot and tight, his limbs growing heavier by the second. "B-But I am Zim! I am Zim! I am an invader! I am… I'm… I'm… I…"

_I am Zim._

_I am an invader._

_I am an Irken invader._

_I am a high-ranking Irken elite, sent on a special mission to the planet Earth!_

Feeling a sudden wave of confidence crash over him, Zim rose to his feet. He knew that this was wrong and completely and utterly impossible and that denial only had worth because it was easier- but he didn't care. He couldn't care less. Denial looked so sweet to him right now, and Zim had always taken the easy way out. "That's right. I am Zim! And I do  _not quit!_ Computer, establish a communication link with my Tallest!"

" _Master, I do not believe that is wise."_

"I don't care what you  _believe_ , computer, just do as your master orders you!"

" _Cannot establish connection."_

"What?! Why not?"

" _It seems that the almighty Tallest have blocked all incoming transmissions from you."_

"But that's impossible… are you lying to me?!"

" _As a computer program, I am incapable of telling a lie to my master."_

"B-But then… that means…"

" _I did warn you, master."_

Zim couldn't even find it within himself to come up with a snarky response. He felt that sudden rush of confidence leave him as quickly as it came. Of course. What had he been thinking? If the Tallest really have blocked him, then that means that they were serious. That means that he truly is an outlaw. A traitor.

_A defective._

True, he'd never let his height stand in his way before. But right now, in this moment, Zim couldn't possibly feel any smaller.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Surprisingly, I can't see Zim living in denial. But don't worry, this depressive period won't last long because that's just not Zim ;)


	4. Chapter 4

“Hey dad?”

“Yes?”

“What do you think... about me being a paranormal investigator?”

Professor Membrane fell silent for a moment. Dib couldn’t see his expression on the monitor from where he was sitting, but he imagined that he was probably frowning, as he usually did whenever Dib so much as mentioned anything paranormal.

“Dad?”

“Well… if you want my true opinion, I think it’s ridiculous,” he said, blunt and without much hesitation, as usual. “But, you are an adult now, and if it’s what you want to do, then I can’t stop you.”

Dib’s face lit up. He actually had his father’s approval on something? “Really? So you don’t mind?”

“I can’t say that, but so long as you’re going to school, then that’s all that matters.”

“Right… well, dad, I gotta go. I agreed to take Gaz to the mall today.”

“Alright, be careful you two. Gaz, don’t let your brother get into any trouble, you hear me?”

Gaz groaned loudly, slamming her GameSlave shut. “How come I always end up babysitting my _ older _ brother?”

Professor Membrane had already ended the call however, leaving the monitor blank. Figures.

“You don’t have to babysit me, Gaz,” Dib muttered flatly as he grabbed his car keys. “Hey, why are you going to the mall today anyway? You never leave the house.”

“I need some new games,” she replied idly. “And that’s not true. You know how I got that job at the supermarket, right? I was saving up.”

“You could’ve just asked dad for money.”

“Yeah, but I like having a job. Keeps me out of the house and away from you. Speaking of that, can you take me to work tomorrow?”

Dib narrowed his eyes. “The grocery store is a five minute walk from our house!”

“It’s  _ hot.  _ Besides, I doubt you’re busy.”

Dib opened his mouth to correct her, only to come to the sad realization that she was right. Damn. Maybe he did need a new hobby. Zim hadn’t been seriously active in _weeks._ “Alright, fine. But you’re treating me to ice cream for all these rides. Gas isn’t cheap, you know.”

“Whatever.”

“You know, you really shouldn’t insult me and then ask for favors right after-“

_ "Drive _ , Dib.”

“…”

He didn’t want to risk making Gaz  _ really _ angry. He did it once.

_ Never again. _

* * *

The ride up was mostly silent. With Dib being focused on driving, Gaz had control of the radio, and she still had a bad habit of blaring her music. Since their father wasn't home much, Gaz had taken to playing her music in her room. Surprisingly, he and Gaz's music taste wasn't all that different, but Dib could hardly hear himself think over it, and he hoped and prayed to whatever gods were out there that this shopping trip wouldn’t take long.

But, perhaps Dib could get something out of this too. He was in need of some new equipment that he might be able to find at the mall.

“Call me when you’re done,” Dib said, “we’ll meet at the food court.”

Gaz nodded, and with that, she disappeared into the dense crowd of people.

Dib started to search around for a nearby electronics store, but froze when he noticed a familiar green dog pushing past the crowds of people, bags upon bags of food and other various items in his tiny arms.

_ What the hell is Gir doing here?! _

“Gir!” he called out. The little robot froze, searching for the source of the voice. He rushed over to where he was standing and grabbed his free hand, dragging him to the edge of the hall so that he wasn’t blocking the way.

“Gir! What are you doing here?!”

Gir cocked his head to the side. “Who are you?”

“I’m Dib, remember? We’ve met. Zim’s arch rival?”

“Ohhhh. You! You are an enemy of my master! You must be destroyed!” Gir prepared to remove his not-so-clever disguise, but Dib quickly shushed him.

“Gir, relax, I’m not here to hurt you or Zim! Calm down, you’ll cause a scene!”

The robot instantly relaxed. “Ooohh, okay! Are you shoppin’ too?! Lookie what I bought!” He proudly held up his bags full of seemingly random items for Dib to see.

“Yeah, that’s great. Um… actually, there’s something I was wondering. Is Zim… dead?”

“Noooope!”

Dib had to be careful with his words. He didn’t know what Gir would say to Zim about this. “Okay. I guess that’s good. Um… why hasn’t he… done anything?”

“I don’t know,” Gir admitted. “Master has been sad lately, so I went shopping to cheer him up!”

“He’s sad? Why?”

“I have no idea! But I hate seeing Master sad!”

An idea, a bright and bold and a damn good idea, suddenly struck Dib. “Gir, I think I can help Zim stop being sad. Will you let me come over later?”

“Mmm… okaaay!" 

Wow. That was easier than he’d expected.

* * *

“I’m hoooooooome!” Gir shouted to no one in particular, dropping his bags of items onto the table.

Zim’s home had become all too familiar to Dib now. He knew this place like the back of his hand. But he also knew that if he tried to get into Zim’s lab, he could easily end up getting himself captured, and that wasn’t really on his agenda for today. This would be quick, in and out. Truth be told, he knew deep down that he shouldn't be this worried. He should be relieved, really damn relieved. But he wasn't. Zim not acting like himself was, for some reason, more alarming to him than anything else.

“Um, Gir, can you get him to come up here?”

Gir nodded his head, smiling sweetly, before drawing in a deep breath (strange, did robots need to breathe?) “MASTER! THERE’S A HUMAN HERE TO SEE YOU!”

“GIR! STOP LETTING HUMANS INTO OUR HOUSE! THAT’S THE THIRD TIME THIS WEEK!”

“BUT IT’S DIB, MASTER! HE SAYS HE CAN HELP YOU STOP BEING SAD!”

Dib groaned loudly. All of this yelling was sure to give him a headache. Was this really how they usually talked to each other?

A loud clanking noise sounded throughout the house as Zim came flying up out of the trashcan, landing almost effortlessly on his feet. He was without his disguise yet again, and appeared none too happy to see Dib. “Get out of my house, Dib-filth! What makes you think you can just waltz in here?!”

“Don’t be like that, I practically live here. Besides, Gir invited me here. Didn’t you Gir?” Dib asked, gesturing to the robot.

“Mmhm!” Gir called from the kitchen. “He’s comin’ to our party, Master!”

“Gir, we’re  _ not  _ having a party!”

“Really?! Aww, but I bought all this stuff!”

“Look,” Dib said, a more serious tone dripping into his voice, “something’s clearly up with you. You might as well just tell me. I’ll find out eventually.”

“Nothing is ‘up’ with me,  _ Dib _ ,” Zim corrected, saying his name as if he were in pain. “And even if there were something ‘up’, as you put it, I would  _ never _ tell you. Ever!”

“Come on, Zim, really. Who else are you gonna tell, if not me?”

Zim’s crimson eyes narrowed into dangerous slits. “Informing the enemy of any weaknesses of mine would basically be suicide. Do you think I’m a fool?”

“You _really_ don’t want me to answer that question.”

“Get out Dib,” Zim growled through clenched teeth, his tiny hands clenching into fists at his sides.

That _look_ in his eyes, the one he had seen the last time he was over, it was back again. Dib threw his hands up in surrender. “I’ll call a truce this time, alright? A truce, just long enough to fix whatever’s wrong with you. Then we can go back to killing each other, if that’s what you want.”

Zim laughed dryly. “A  _ truce?  _ With my greatest enemy? Ha! I’d sooner die than work with a _human!”_

Dib shrugged. “Suit yourself, but it’s looking like those are your only options.”

“Wrong,” Zim pulled out the same strange-looking gun that he had threatened him with last time, “there is a third option. I can decorate my living room with your entrails.”

Seven years ago, Dib would have been afraid. He would have ran or begged for his life. But he knew better now. He knew Zim almost eerily well. And despite Zim’s infamous unpredictability, he was about ninety five percent sure that he wouldn’t dare to pull that trigger, lest he risk losing the greatest arch nemesis he ever had.

“Scary,” he quipped with a small, nervous grin, “but not good enough, space boy. Try again.”

“You  _ dare _ challenge me?”

“I’ve been challenging you since day one.”

Zim noticeably stiffened at that, the barrel of the gun falling from its spot against Dib’s forehead. “Why do you want to help me?”

“Because it’s weird when you’re not trying to take over the world. Or trying to kill me. So that means something’s up.”

_ And once I figure out what, I’ll find out whatever big plan you’re trying to hide. _

“Come on,” Dib extended his hand. “A temporary truce. We’ve done it before.”

Zim glanced back and forth between Dib’s cautious smile and his offered hand. This wasn’t the first time that Dib had proposed a truce, but usually it was under much different circumstances. This time, the Earth wasn’t exactly in any imminent danger. There were no pressing, immediate circumstances. It was just him and Dib and this stupid planet. It could be a trap, but Zim usually saw Dib’s traps coming a mile away. Besides, even if he did manage to get tricked, he’d find his way out, and get back at him tenfold. He’d make _sure_ of that.

He wouldn’t tell Dib  _ everything,  _ he wasn’t a complete idiot. But he guessed that at this point, he didn’t have much else to lose. Besides, having Dib on his side  _ temporarily  _ could potentially be useful in the future. But he was no fool. Truces between the two of them never lasted long.

“Very well,” he finally said after a moment of uncomfortable silence. “But don’t think that this means I trust you completely. Keep in mind, Dib-filth, that the information I am entrusting you with is top secret. If you betray our deal and tell  _ anyone,  _ I’ll kill you without hesitation.”

“Same goes for you,” Dib fired back. “If you think I can trust you one hundred percent, then you’re out of your mind. And this truce ends when  _ I say,  _ understand?”

“And why should I agree to that?”

“Because I don’t want to do this anymore than you do. So we’ll make this quick.”

“…Fine.”

Another awkward silence passed between them, thickening the tension in the air. Dib gestured down at his hand with his eyes, hoping that would be enough to tip the alien off.

“Why are you doing that thing with your eyes?”

Dib rolled his eyes. “God, Zim, my  _ hand _ . It’s a handshake. If we’re doing this, we gotta shake on it.”

“I’m well aware of what a handshake is. But you must have a terrible case of brain worms if you think I’m going to soil myself with your human germs-”

“Do it, or else it’s not official.”

Zim felt himself cringe internally. He would have to bathe in  _ paste _ after this was over. If there was one thing he hated more than humans, it was  _ being touched _ by a human. Actually, being touched by anything in general freaked him out.

Hesitantly, he slowly reached out and took Dib’s hand within his own. Dib snorted as he tried (and failed) to conceal his laughter.

“What?!”

“Zim, you’re not supposed to hold my hand.”

Zim looked down at their interlaced fingers and quickly released his hand, turning away from him. “I did nothing of the sort.”

“Here, it’s like this.” Dib reached for his hand, sliding his own alongside it so that it fit (almost) perfectly into place. “And then, we shake.” He shook his arm once, firmly and sternly, before promptly releasing Zim’s hand.

“…That was weird. I don’t want to do that anymore.”

“It was only weird ‘cause you made it weird.”

“No,  _ you _ made it weird Dib-stink! Ugh… you already got what you wanted, now go away!”

“No can do.” Dib plopped himself down on the couch. “Since we have a temporary truce, our houses are no longer off limits to each other.”

“That was  _ not _ part of the agreement!”

“It is now. Besides, I have to be here to help you, don’t I?”

“I didn’t  _ ask _ you to help me, you know,” Zim grumbled irritably.

“No, but you agreed to accept my help, and you shook on it, so there’s no going back. So, sit your alien ass down here and tell me why you haven’t tried to murder me yet.” Dib patted the spot beside him, a snarky grin present on his face.

“My  **_glorious_ ** _ alien ass  _ will stay right here. And technically, I  _ did _ try just a few moments ago.”

“That wasn’t really trying, since we both knew you weren’t going to do it anyway. Besides, a gun to the head? Would it kill you to be a bit more original?”

“…Whatever, filthy human.”

“Disgusting alien.”

“Hideous ape!”

“Bug boy.”

_ "You..!” _

“Wanna keep going? I’ve got all day.”

Fuming, Zim folded his arms over his chest and plopped down on the couch, as far away from Dib as he could possibly be. Dib almost wanted to scoot closer to him just to really piss him off, but decided against it, figuring the small Irken was already embarrassed enough.

Well, he might as well get right to the point. He didn't really like beating around the bush, and he figured Zim didn't either. It was one of the very few things they had in common. “It’s not uncommon for you to go into hiding for certain amounts of time to throw me off, but something about it seemed different this time.”

Zim, who had been sitting with his cheek resting in the palm of his hand, turned slightly to look up at him, eyes widening with surprise. “…You really have been paying attention to me.”

“Of course. You always know how to keep me on my toes, I’ll give you that.”

“I don’t know what toes have to do with this.”

“It’s an  _ expression.  _ Now are you gonna tell me or not?”

Zim squirmed almost as if he were uncomfortable, struggling to decide what he should or shouldn’t say. “My earth mission has been… compromised.”

Dib raised a brow. “Duh, I’ve known about your ‘mission’ forever now.”

“Not by  _ you.  _ I mean, it was… terminated. Technically. Sort of. Maybe.”

“Terminated? You mean… like canceled, right?”

“No, not ‘like canceled’! Just… postponed. Yes. Postponed. You see, Dib-filth, my Tallest, they…” he paused, the words seemingly getting stuck in his throat.

“Tallest? You mean your leaders, right? I’ve met them before. Speaking of which, why do you refer to them as ‘tallest’? What does that even mean?”

“It’s self-explanatory! The Tallest rule over Irk because they are the  _ tallest!” _

“So you mean… they were elected because they’re  _ tall?” _

“Stupid Dib. Tallest leaders are not  _ elected _ . They serve until they are either killed or are no longer the tallest Irkens alive.”

Dib managed to keep a straight face for about three seconds before he suddenly burst into laughter, placing his hands on his knees to steady himself. “Zim… I’m sorry, but  _ that _ …  _ is the stupidest  _ f ucking thing I’ve ever heard.”

“You dare insult my people?!”

“I’m  _ s-sorry _ ,” Dib said between snorts. “It’s just silly. And ridiculous. Height isn’t what makes a leader a leader.”

Dib had expected Zim to yell at him or to go on some long tangent, but surprisingly, the Irken merely slid off the couch, refusing to face Dib. “On Irk, height determines status. It is the way of the Irken race.”

“You must not have had a very high status, then,” Dib commented absentmindedly.

Zim visibly flinched at that, but did not respond.

Dib leaned forward, his arms resting on his legs. “Hey, is that what this is all about? I mean, you are almost pitifully small, but-“

Zim suddenly whipped around to face him, his antennae standing high at attention. “Silence! I don’t need to hear that from a _human!”_

His scarlet eyes burned hot with fury and something else that Dib couldn’t really define. Yet again, it was that same look he had seen when he came over the first time. “Zim…” he said, his voice holding an air of caution to it. “Is that why your mission got… um, postponed?”

Zim refused to answer him. The Tallest’s taunting words still bounced around in his head, over and over and over again. He couldn’t get them to go away _. _ Thoughts, feelings... they were becoming more and more erratic and uncontrollable. And he was powerless to stop it.

Dib shrugged carelessly, rising to his feet. “If that’s all this is, then it’s really no big deal. It’s not like these ‘Tallest’ guys were great leaders anyway-“

“Stop talking like you know me or my people!” Despite only reaching Dib’s lower torso, Zim backed him up until he was against the door, his threatening glare keeping him pinned to the spot. “You know nothing of me or my Tallest, or of my home planet! I knew it, this was all just a ploy to get information out of me!”

_ That’s only halfway true _ , Dib thought. “Look, Zim, we’re... _sort of_ friends, and it’s obvious that it’s bothering you, so just tell me! If you have no evil plan, I can’t really use this information against you, can I?”

“Yes you can! You can expose me to all the other miserable humans-“

“I’ve  _ tried _ ,” Dib replied with a disappointed huff. “Nobody believes me. I’ve contacted every government office and I have shown them irrefutable proof of your existence. No one took me seriously. Not anyone. I figured… that if nobody wanted to listen, then there was nothing I could do.”

Zim blinked slowly. “Then why… did you keep fighting against me?”

Dib shrugged. “I dunno, to be honest. It seems to me that the human race is just  _ begging  _ to be destroyed. But… I guess I did it for Gaz and my dad, mostly. Cause I wanted them to have the chance to live. But even  _ they  _ think I’m insane. My sister couldn’t care less, and my dad’s never been around much, but when he is, all he does is tell me I’m crazy.”

“…Oh. And… what of your mother unit?”

“You’re asking about my mom?”

“N-Not because I care, but… if my research is correct, a human ‘nuclear’ family will consist of a mother, a father, and two children. Not that I would know, since Irkens can’t have children-“

“Irkens can’t reproduce?” Dib asked. The very thought of a species being unable to reproduce was alarming to him. And honestly… kind of sad.

“No, at least, not in the same way humans can.”

“Then how-“

Zim sighed melodramatically. “DNA samples from male and female adult Irkens are cloned, mixed, and then put in a tube to incubate and grow for approximately-“

Dib held up a hand to stop him. “Yeah okay, I get the picture. So… you were never a kid?”

“Of course I was. But Irken children are not as weak and defenseless as human newborns. And biologically speaking, we do not stay children for long.”

Dib’s eyes lit up as if he had just made a new discovery. “Of course. You’re from a militarized race, so you don’t really have a need to be children and grow up.”

Zim ignored Dib’s (correct, admittedly) observation. “You didn’t answer my question, Dib. What of your mother?”

Dib... didn’t really like talking about his mother. It was just something that sort of went unspoken in his household. They had been raised without a mother, and they never knew what it was like to have two parents instead of one. As far as he knew, his father had never considered remarriage. The question inevitably came however in the first grade, when Dib was told to draw a picture of his family. The other children were confused, and asked him where his mother was. The teacher had scolded the children at the time, telling them that it wasn't polite to ask such a question. But Dib found himself growing curious as well, and when he came home that night, he had asked his father about it. 

_"Hey Daddy, why don't I... have a mom?"_

_"Oh... Mommy is, she's... she's not around...anymore."_

Eventually, once both Dib and Gaz were old enough to hear it, he'd told them the truth. 

_"Your mother... died in a car accident, not long after Gaz was born."_

“She’s dead,” he mumbled. “I didn’t really get to know her. She died when Gaz was a baby. At least, that’s what dad said, anyway.”

Zim fell silent for a few moments, and Dib really wished he would say something soon. He never liked mentioning his mother, and whenever it came up, he always tried to find an excuse to change the topic quickly.

Because all his life, he had found that avoiding the problem was better than fixing it, after all.

“Oh.”

“What?”

“I'm just surprised that you told me, that’s all.”

Dib suddenly looked down at the floor. “Yeah, well, it’s only fair I guess, since you told me some stuff about Irk.”

“...What’s happened to you, Dib? Since when do you ever play fair?” Zim asked, a slight teasing hint to his voice.

Dib snickered in response. “I could ask you the same question.”

“Zim doesn’t need to play fair. I make my own rules.”

“Yeah. You always have. And it was a pain in the ass.”

“So long as I am causing you some sort of discomfort.”

He couldn't help but laugh at that. “Look,” he said, louder to get his attention, “I don’t really know exactly what’s bothering you, but if it’s what I think it is, then you really shouldn’t worry about it. If anything, it just means that you’re free now. You can do what you want.”

“ You _ don’t understand,”  _ Zim said, his antennae lowering and flattening against his head.  “Irkens don’t... live freely. Not like you stupid humans do. We  _ need  _ someone to command us.”

“The Tallest seem to do whatever they want,” Dib pointed out.

“That is because they are the tallest. But for sma- er,  _ vertically challenged  _ Irkens like myself, we don’t live that way. We can’t.”

“But you can. If your mission’s been terminated-“

“Then what?! You thought I would just  _ stop?! _ ” The long, spindly metal legs from his PAK shot out of either side, lifting him up so he was eye-to-eye with Dib. “You do remember,  _ Dib _ , that this is a temporary truce, correct? That as soon as either of us says the word, the deal is off?”

“Wrong,  _ I’m _ in control of this deal. You agreed to that. You can’t try to kill me until I say so. So answer me, Zim, what’s the point if your so-called “tallest” have terminated your mission?”

“If… If the Tallest do not wish for me to be at their service any longer, then very well. But you misunderstand me, Dib. If you thought that I would suddenly grow weak like you dimwitted humans, then you are sorely mistaken. I am still an Irken soldier, and if the Tallest will not give me orders, then I will follow every Irken’s basic instinct: invade. Conquer.”

Dib felt himself tense as the truth of the situation began to unravel in front of him. “Come on Zim, it doesn’t have to be like that! If there’s no mission then there’s no point! That’s what you said, right? That Irkens can’t live without orders?”

“The Tallest have deemed  _ me _ a defective, so I no longer have to take orders from them. There is no one else left with the authority to boss me around! And so-“

“Wait,” Dib interrupted, “they said you were  _ defective?” _

Zim snorted. “Please, don’t think that you’ve discovered a weakness just because my PAK-“

“No, it’s not that, it’s just… how can you call a  _ person defective?” _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Before anyone says it, I know that it was supposed to be revealed that Dib was a clone of his father. Give it time. ;)


	5. Chapter 5

'Defectives are an abomination', he'd said.

People are not machines. Human, animal, alien,  _whatever_ , they aren't machines. Therefore it was impossible for them to be labeled as 'defective'. And yet these supposed "tallest" had deemed Zim to be defective, as if he were just some malfunctioning piece of machinery. What was considered "defective" to them? Superiority was determined by height, so were the short also considered defective as well?

He was probably the last person who had any place  _defending Zim,_ and the mere thought of it confused the hell out of him, but there was something about it that just didn't sound right to him. How could these "tallest" call themselves leaders if they treated their people in such a way?

As Dib had come to notice, Zim wasn't acting like his usual self,  _again_. He seemed to be at war with himself, contradicting himself left and right. He appeared to be struggling with his loyalties. Perhaps this was the perfect time. If Zim was struggling to figure out what to do next, perhaps Dib could convince him, even if talking to Zim was like talking to a brick wall sometimes.

"Zim, please listen to me. I know you're confused and upset right now, but I can help you! We're still in a truce, remember?"

Another metal arm shot out from his PAK, pressing cold and hard against Dib's chest to keep him still against the door. "This stupid "truce" is the only thing keeping me from killing you right now! You've never cared about my mission! All of this was just a trick! I knew it from the start! I'll get you back for this, do you hear me?! I won't let you get away with manipulating me! You weakened me… made me tell  _you… things, personal things!"_

Dib couldn't help but pick up on the fact that Zim seemed  _genuinely hurt_ , if he was even capable of such a thing. "Zim,  _please_ , you're just confused right now. You're confused and upset, and I know that part of that is my fault, but this truce? I really meant it. I don't want us to fight right now."

Zim tightly shut his eyes, wincing as if he were in physical pain. He placed both hands on either side of his head, his gloved fingers digging into the skin there. "No, you…  _ugh!_  Shut up! Shut up! I am Zim! I am an invader! I have a mission! I…"

"Zim-"

"I… my Tallest… abandoned…"

The metal legs retracted back into the PAK, and Zim slumped forward, hitting Dib's chest before falling to the floor.

"Zim? Hey, what's wrong?!" He dropped to his knees and placed a hand on the alien's smooth cheek. He was still breathing, and still seemed to be somewhat conscious. In fact…

_He's asleep! He just fell asleep on me!_

Strange. He didn't think Irkens needed sleep.

Dib was kind of glad for the sudden interruption. Perhaps some rest would be good for Zim, that way he could get his strength back and figure things out. Without really thinking much about it, he gathered the alien into his arms and carried him over to the couch, gently setting him down. Zim had grown a bit since they first met, but he really was rather light. He probably didn't weigh much more now than he did when Dib was a kid.

"Stupid alien. Causing me all this trouble… why couldn't you have picked another planet to invade?"

Based off of what Zim had told him, it seemed as though these "tallest" were relieving him of duty. But why? Why have him give up on his mission if they were after universal domination? And why deem Zim "defective"? Sure, he sucked at invading, that much was obvious, but surely that wasn't enough for him to be labeled "defective". And although he didn't want to show it, Zim seemed to take this rather personally. Zim took  _everything_  to heart, as Dib had come to notice. He didn't really know the meaning of "let it go". He overreacted to just about everything. Maybe that's all this was. Perhaps these "tallest" weren't what Zim was making them out to be.

He needed to talk to them himself.

He had no idea if they would even listen to a human, but he figured it was worth a try in order to figure out what was going on.

He looked down at Zim's sleeping form and sighed.  _Sorry Zim, but I'm gonna sneak around for a little bit._

He had seen Zim come up from the trash can, so he figured that that was probably where the elevator to Zim's lab was hidden. He walked over to it and prepared to climb inside, but was stopped by a blaring robotic voice.

" _Intruder alert, intruder alert! You do not have access to the second level!"_

"Shhh!" Dib futilely attempted to shush the computer. Thankfully, Zim didn't wake up and was still sleeping peacefully. Well, as peacefully as an Irken  _could_  sleep. "I need to get downstairs!" he said in a hushed tone.

" _Negative, the Master's lab is off limits to humans."_

"Okay, then... can you contact Zim's leaders, the Tallest?"

" _Negative, the Tallest have blocked all transmissions from the master. And, not to mention that you do not have authorization to send or receive transmissions."_

"They've blocked him? Um… is there any other way you can contact them?"

" _The only other way to establish contact would be to contact them from a restricted or unknown network. The computers on the Massive have already traced and identified this system and have blocked it."_

_Restricted or unknown… Tak's ship!_

"Thanks!" Dib rushed out the door and hurried over to his car, clambering into the driver's seat.

He had to get back home, and fast.

* * *

" _You want me to do_ what  _now?"_

"Establish a communication link with the Tallest. Can you do it?"

" _I can, but that doesn't mean I will. Why would_ you  _want to contact the almighty Tallest?"_

"I need to talk to them about… something. It's about Zim."

The ship hesitated to answer him. Dib was growing impatient. He didn't really have time for the ship to throw a hissyfit about him needing it for a favor. "Well?"

" _So let me get this straight: you want me to help Zim, who I hate, by contacting the almighty Tallest for **you,**  who I also hate?"_

Dib blinked. "You hate the Tallest?"

" _I hate_ you _, genius."_

He shrugged carelessly. "Well, we've already established that. Come on, help me out?"

" _No."_

"Please?"

" _Give me one good reason why I should help you."_

"Because we're partners! Besides, if you don't, Zim might-"

" _Please, that moron could never take over Earth and you know it."_

" _Actually_ , he's gotten close a few times," Dib stated. "Come on, if you do it, I won't ask for anything else!"

"… _We both know that's a lie, but fine. Just don't expect any more favors after this."_

Static rolled across the monitor as the ship attempted to reach the Irken leaders. Dib found that he was kind of nervous, even though he shouldn't be- he's met them before, not to mention that they were of the same alien race as Zim.

Two familiar faces suddenly flashed across the screen. He seemed to have caught them at a rather inopportune time, as they were both in the middle of eating what appeared to be junk food. They seemed to be mostly confused as they stared up at him through the screen in wonder.

"Oh. You're not Tak," Tallest Purple noted.

"Yeah, you're not. But, you do look familiar," Tallest Red added.

Dib shyly averted their inquisitive stares. "Yeah, um, we've met before. About seven years ago. I'm Dib."

Tallest Purple gasped, dropping the snack bag he was holding. "Oh, I remember now! You're that kid with the big head!"

"It's still quite large," Tallest Red quipped. "Although, you appear to be older now, human. Tell me, how are you contacting us from Tak's ship?"

Dib sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck, a nervous habit that he had developed rather recently. "Uh… long story. But I have something to ask you about Zim!"

"Zim? You know him?" Tallest Red inquired curiously.

Oh, he knew Zim alright. He probably knew him better than his own leaders.

"Yeah, uh, no offense, but I've kinda been the one stopping him from taking over Earth."

The two leaders exchanged blank stares before suddenly erupting into loud, boisterous laughter.

"O-Oh man, this just keeps getting better!" Tallest Red sputtered through laughs.

"S-So you're telling me," Tallest Purple stuttered out as he wiped a tear from his eye, "that  _you_ are Earth's  _sole defender…_ and Zim  _still_  couldn't take over Earth?!" He collapsed onto the couch, clutching his sides.

Dib arched a brow. This was definitely  _not_  the reaction he'd been expecting. "Um… I'm kind of confused here… why are you laughing?"

"Oh," Tallest Red mumbled dejectedly, "that's right. You probably don't know."

Dib felt himself starting to get a bit annoyed with them now. What the hell kind of "leaders" were they? "Yeah, I don't. I thought you guys were after galactic conquest or whatever. Why terminate Zim's mission?"

Tallest Purple seemed to have finally recovered from his fit of laughter, but he hadn't moved from his spot on the couch. "That's the funny part, there never was a mission!"

" _What?"_

"If you  _must_  know, large-headed human, Zim is single-handedly responsible for ruining our first attempt at galactic conquest, 'Operation Impending Doom One'. Tak mentioned it when she came to Earth, didn't she?" Tallest Red asked, although it was said as more of a statement than a question.

Dib had to admit, he wasn't all that surprised. It makes sense that his leaders wouldn't be too fond of him if that were the case.

"He's also, although inadvertently, responsible for the deaths of the other invaders in the academy," Tallest Purple added. "Simply put, he destroyed everything, all in a foolish attempt to prove that he could be an invader."

"Not that he could ever be a real invader anyway, considering his pathetic size. Actually, come to think of it," Tallest Red leaned in towards the monitor, eyeing Dib up and down, "you are quite tall, human. Zim tells us that your kind somehow manages to be tall yet stupid."

Dib flushed under their scrutinizing gazes. "Sounds like Zim," he grumbled. "Yeah, uh, humans can get pretty tall. But we're not all stupid like Zim says."

"I see that, considering that a pathetic human like you managed to figure out Irken technology," Tallest Purple spat. "Speaking of which, since you are in possession of Tak's ship, that means she failed her mission."

"What? No way. Tak's an elite, one of the best in her class. There's no way Zim managed to beat her," Tallest Red replied, a hint of a whine in his voice.

"You'd be surprised," Dib idly commented, "I won't deny that Zim's an idiot, but he comes through. Sometimes."

"Oh! Look at this, Purple, the human has grown attached to Zim!" Tallest Red jeered, a mocking grin spread across his face.

Dib's cheeks flushed brightly. "What?! No! Zim and I are enemies... kinda... but that's it!"

"Oh, then why haven't you killed him yet? Could've saved us a lot of trouble if you did," Tallest Purple muttered, clearly disappointed.

Dib couldn't believe the absolute nerve of these guys. To think that Zim had been serving guys like  _them_  all his life... no wonder he is the way he is.

Tallest Red wagged an elongated finger disapprovingly. "You shouldn't get attached to him, human. Zim is a bomb, you know, and he's ticking away."

"A bomb? What do you mean by that?"

"Zim's a defective, and he's been that way since he was a mere smeet! And to make matters worse, his PAK was malfunctioning. We never bothered with fixing it," Tallest Purple explained.

"What's a defective? Why label Zim 'defective'? It doesn't make any sense! He's just as horrifying as the rest of you!" Dib shouted, pointing an accusatory finger at the both of them.

"Now now, flattery will get you nowhere, human," Tallest Red chided. "A 'defective' is an Irken who isn't fit to serve the Empire. We usually have no use for them, so we either banish or kill them."

Dib sat back against the seat as he slowly attempted to process their words. He knew that the Irkens were obviously a very advanced, highly militarized species. They had to be, after all, considering all of Zim's superior technology and his knowledge on how to use it. They were an invasive species, so it only made sense that they were advanced enough as a society to take over other planets. But he never could've guessed that it'd be anything like  _this._ He understood the whole military thing to some degree, but how could they go so far as to treat their own people like weapons?

_Talk about inhumane._

"So then… why keep Zim around? Why not just banish him, or…"

Tallest Purple waved a dismissive hand. "He  _begged_  us for a chance to prove that he could be an invader. He was  _so sure_  that he would grow taller. It was a mistake for Tallest Miyuki to even  _allow_  him anywhere  _near_  the academy. After the failure of Operation Impending Doom One, we banished him to Foodcourtia. And then he showed up at the Assigning, saying that he 'quit'. You don't just quit being banished!"

"And so, rather than kill him, we decided we'd have a little fun with him," Tallest Red said pointedly. "So we gave him a fake mission and sent him to the other side of the galaxy, and he just so happened to end up on Earth. Your planet wasn't even marked for invasion."

Tallest Purple heaved a sigh. "We were hoping that Earthlings were flesh-eating monsters, or something that could kill Zim, so we're kind of disappointed."

"So… you basically  _exiled Zim…_ and he has no idea? He thinks he's on some sort of special mission?" Dib asked, just to make sure he had their story straight.

"Yeah, I know! Genius, right?"

"Obviously he knows  _now,"_ Tallest Red corrected, "since we told him. No matter what happened, it seemed that nothing, not even you, could kill him. And he kept checking in with status updates. It was funny at first, but now it's  _incredibly_  annoying."

"Although," Tallest Purple chimed in, "if we had known that  _you_ were in the picture, we might have kept it from him a little longer. Just to see you two chase each other like idiots."

" _Jesus,"_ Dib breathed out, "that's… even if it's  _Zim,_ that's all kinds of fucked up."

Tallest Red's usual hooded eyes went wide with curiosity. "We don't know this 'Jesus' you're referring to. Is he tall?"

Dib had the sudden urge to bang his head against the nearest flat surface. Repeatedly, for several hours. "Alright, look, I know better than anyone that Zim's an asshole, and I get that he really messed up your plans, but don't you think-"

" _Dib-filth,"_ an all-too familiar voice growled, "what in  _the hell_ do you think you're doing?"

_Crap._

"Z-Zim," Dib stuttered, "I… um… how much of that did you hear?"

"Enough," Zim answered shortly as he pushed Dib against the side of the ship to seat himself. There really wasn't enough room for both of them, hell, there was barely enough room for  _Dib,_ so Zim was practically on top of him at this point, clambering over his legs to reach the monitor. "I am  _so sorry_ for this impudent, disgusting human, my Tallest. I tried to reach you myself, but-"

"Zim, you absolute  _idiot,"_ Dib snapped. "Can't you see that they don't want anything to do with you anymore?"

" _Silence-"_

"Your little friend's telling the truth, you know," Tallest Red said, absentmindedly twirling a clawed finger around his left antenna.

"O-Oh no, my Tallest, I can assure you that Dib and I are  _not friends,_ despite how obvious it is that he-"

"Zim I  _swear to God-_ "

"This conversation has become boring-"

"Wait!" Dib slapped away the hand that was pinning him down and scooted ever closer to the alien to be within view of the screen. "I still have questions!"

They both laughed mockingly in response. "Silly human, we're not obligated to answer  _any_  of your questions. The only reason we told you anything at all is because you are not a threat," Tallest Red explained.

"I can be," Dib said menacingly. "Now tell me, why did you say that Zim's a time bomb? What's going to happen?"

Tallest Purple opened his mouth to respond, but upon seeing Zim's crestfallen expression, merely grinned in an almost sickeningly sweet manner. "I think Zim probably knows the answer to that."

"Now then, Zim, we'll leave you to the human with the large head. And we mean it this time,  _don't contact us again."_

"But my Tallest!"

The monitor went black, causing the ship to grow deathly quiet. Well, almost.

" _Transmission ended. Oh, and the Tallest have also blocked transmissions from ME as well. So, thanks for that."_

Zim was on him in an instant, straddling him and pinning him to the ship's seat. " _You…_ foolish Dib-filth! This is  _your_  fault! My Tallest have abandoned me because of  _you!_ My mission is no more because of  _you!"_

"Me?! How is any of this  _my fault?! You're_ the one that messed up Operation Impending Doom One and made them hate you!"

Zim's lilac eyes grew wide. "How… how did you know about that?!"

"They  _told me._ I decided I'd talk to them to figure out what was going on," Dib said coolly.

Zim pointed a clawed finger at him. "You had  _no right_  to be poking around in my personal affairs!"

"Maybe not, but we had a truce! So tell me, why are you defective? Is it your PAK? Or-"

"Just because we have a truce,  _Dib_ ," Zim poked at his chest for emphasis, "does not mean that I owe you that information!"

"Why? What are you trying so hard to protect?! There's no mission anymore, you  _heard them-"_

" _Because when an Irken has no mission, he has no purpose!"_ the Irken shouted, overcome with sudden emotion. Realizing his error, Zim recoiled, covering his mouth with shaking hands. He quickly lifted himself off of Dib, climbing out of the ship.

"Zim, hold up a sec!" Dib hurriedly jumped out of the ship and followed after him. "What do you mean you have no purpose?"

"It's just as I said, human! Irkens are given missions until they are no longer physically capable of completing them." Zim stopped briefly before whipping around to face him. "And you… now, thanks to  _you_ , my Tallest will never give me a mission again!"

Dib felt the rage he'd been concealing start to bubble up to the surface. In a poorly hidden fit of anger, he bent down until he was eye-to-eye with Zim, grabbing the the Irken's uniform and yanking him closer. "Would you quit putting the blame on me?! It's not my fault you're  _defective."_

Zim's eyes grew to the size of dinner plates. His jaw worked as if he were trying to say something, but the words wouldn't come forth. He merely stood limply, averting Dib's heated gaze.

The intensity of what he'd just said hit him, and Dib quickly released Zim, staggering backwards. "I… I'm sorry, I didn't mean that-"

Zim abruptly turned away from him, folding his arms over his chest. "Our little 'truce' is  _over_ , Dib." And with that, he began walking back in the direction of his home, without another word.

And for some reason, that only  _infuriated_ Dib. How dare he walk away from this? Dib had put so much thought into this, had agonized so much over the thought of working with Zim rather than against him, and he cut it off, just like that?

Well, fuck that. Fuck him. If all Zim wanted was to mope because he had no more mission, then let him.

"Yeah, run back home, you coward! I didn't need a truce anyways! Asshole!"

Zim didn't even so much as look back at him as he turned the corner.

Dib rolled his eyes, trying to force down the sorrow and guilt bubbling up inside him. Good riddance.  _And to think that I even felt sorry for you._


	6. Chapter 6

_"De-fec-tive: imperfect or faulty."_

Zim cursed out-loud, slamming his fist into the desk.  _Him,_ defective?! What were the Tallest thinking?! He'd always known that he was shorter than the average Irken, but he didn't think that warranted being labeled as a  _filthy defective._ Defectives were a disgrace to the Empire.

But now everything was slowly starting to make sense. All that time he'd spent at Foodcourtia hadn't been some mistake or a mission. That  _really was_  banishment.

"Computer, run a diagnostics test on my PAK."

A metal arm shot out, reaching around Zim to connect to his PAK. Zim watched the monitor impatiently as he awaited the results.

_"PAK diagnostics test complete."_  The metal arm retracted from his PAK.

"Well?!" Zim demanded.

_"PAK is fully functional and operating properly."_

Zim grabbed hold of his antennae, tugging on them in frustration. "So then what's the problem?! How am I defective?!"

_"Diagnostics test revealed one error."_

"What is it?"

_"Initial PAK programming incomplete."_

His patience was thinning fast. "Get to the point, computer!"

_"A scan of your brainwaves reveals that you have retained free will, a trait that should have been eliminated with your PAK. One of the jobs of a PAK is to keep an Irken's emotions in check, so that they remain faithful to the Empire."_

"I'm well aware of that! But that doesn't make sense; I have always been loyal to the Irken Empire!"

_"According to the Control Brain archive, your particular gene pattern is congruent to the gene patterns of defective Irkens. Or, in other words, potentially rebellious Irkens."_

"R-Rebellion?!" Zim sputtered, shielding his eyes from the screen as if he were offended by the sight. "But I would never… and betray my Tallest?!"

_Although, it seems… like my Tallest… have betrayed me._

He shook his head. No, what was he thinking?! It was traitorous thoughts like those that would get him…

That would get him…

_What_ , exactly?

That would get him killed? Maybe, but the Tallest had claimed that he was exiled to Earth.

So what then? What did he have left to prove? What did he have left in  _general?_  It was becoming alarmingly clear to Zim that Dib was right, that he didn't have a mission, and the Tallest weren't going to give him one. Even if he followed his "basic Irken instinct" (which, admittedly, wasn't really a thing. It was something he had made up to intimidate Dib), if he conquered a hundred or even a thousand planets, it  _still_  wouldn't make him an invader. To the Tallest, it would only make him a sad, desperate Irken hell-bent on proving a moot point. Perhaps that's all he was, especially now that he had finally discovered that they were right- that by Irken standards, he was  _defective._

But  _why? How?_ And even if he was, what made him incapable of being an invader? Why was it that the Tallest would not look twice at a defective?

_You know why,_ his brain told him. But he hardly wanted to listen.

He just wanted a mission. He wanted his Tallest back.

He wanted a  _purpose_.

Because an Irken without a mission, was an Irken without a reason for existing.

* * *

Dib bit at his nails as he anxiously paced back and forth around his bedroom. What should he do now? Should he expect Zim to start trying to kill him again? Or maybe he should apologize?

_Why the hell should I have to apologize? Zim started it!_

Even so, he  _had_  said something that had clearly gotten to the alien, and maybe under different circumstances that would be a good thing- no, there was nothing good about what he'd said. He should apologize. Even if Zim didn't accept it, which Dib could guarantee he wouldn't, he still needed him to know that he regretted what he said. Even if Zim  _was_ a horrible person.

_Ugh,_  the moral high ground was infuriating. But he figured that this unsettling feeling in the pit of his stomach wouldn't go away unless he apologized, and he really needed to get on with his life instead of dwelling over it. Having made up his mind, Dib grabbed his car keys and headed out the door.

When he arrived at Zim's house, this time he was prepared for when his robot servant answered the door instead of him.

"Hiya!" Gir waved, drinking what appeared to be a smoothie.

"Hi, um, is Zim here? I need to talk to him."

"GIR! Is that the Dib?!"

Gir turned to look at Dib, who was frantically shaking his head. "Uh… no?!"

Dib heard some shuffling before Zim pushed Gir aside, grabbing the door from him. "Ah-ha! It  _is_  you, Dib!"

Dib threw his hands up in surrender. "Look, I'm not here to fight, I just wanna talk!"

"No thanks, you've done quite enough of the talking." Zim moved to slam the door shut, but Dib caught it with his foot.

"I came to apologize, alright?!" Dib shouted exasperatedly. Might as well get straight to the point. "It's… about what I said. About you being defective. I know that you won't really accept my apology, and that's fine I guess, but… I wanted you to know that I'm sorry. I didn't mean it. It just sort of… came out."

Zim looked as if he were considering Dib's sincerity for a moment before his eyes narrowed. "Oh  _please_ , Dib-worm.  _Spare me_. You really think that I would be weak to something a filthy human said?! Oh no, what angered me was the fact that you betrayed the trust that I placed in you and talked to my leaders behind my back!"

"I was just trying to help you! I wanted to know what was wrong because I was worried, and I thought that if I talked to your leaders, I might be able to get some answers! Besides, I'm not completely at fault here! You're the one that keeps blaming me for everything! Take some responsibility for once!"

"Save it, Dib! You weren't worried; you just wanted to see what my next plan for world domination was!"

"That's only… half true. But can you blame me?! That  _is_  what you've been trying to do for the past seven years."

"Why come over and act like you wanted to apologize when really all you wanted was a fight?! If you wanted to fight with me, I would have been more than happy to oblige. I-"

He should've known that this wasn't going to end well. Why did he ever have hope that perhaps Zim could change? "Whatever. I've said what I needed to say, so I'm leaving." He removed his foot from the door and turned around, walking back towards his car.

"Wait! Don't walk away from me, Dib-human!"

"Too late."

_"Hey!"_

He managed to grab hold of Dib's fingers on his right hand, and surprisingly, that kept him still. "Why did you apologize? Are we not still…"

"That's up to you," Dib replied, "but there are some lines I don't ever want to cross. And that was one of them. Of course, to be fair, I'm kind of shocked that you actually have, you know,  _feelings and all,_ but still."

Zim slowly released Dib's fingers. "Zim… does not have feelings. I'm incapable of disgusting emotions, thankfully."

Dib felt a stinging sensation resonating deep in his chest when he recalled his words, and the words of Zim's leaders. "Right. Well, if it makes you feel any better, I don't think you're defective."

"…You don't?" Zim asked, and if Dib didn't know any better, he'd say that there was a bit of shyness in his tone.

"No," Dib replied. "I think you're batshit crazy, and obnoxious, and I can never tell what you're thinking, but no. I don't think you're defective."

"Gee, thanks," Zim grumbled flatly. "On Irk, all of those qualities would earn me the label of 'defective'."

"Well, you're on Earth right now. Besides, even if you are, who cares? Defective or not, you're still Zim."

Zim didn't respond, and Dib suddenly felt a bit awkward. Perhaps he had said too much? He was already growing more uncomfortable by the minute and hoped that he could find an excuse to leave soon. The tension was becoming unbearable.

"I see," Zim finally said; his voice uncharacteristically small. "So then what do I do?"

Dib froze. "You're asking  _me_ what to do?"

"You are unfortunately all I have left, human scum, so yes, I am asking you what to do."

He wasn't sure if it was just the heat getting to him, but Dib could've sworn that it just got about ten degrees hotter outside. "Um… I don't know, do whatever you want I guess, just so long as it doesn't involve murdering or enslaving anyone."

"Whatever I want?"

"Yeah. Go explore space or something. Or, make yourself useful and stay here. Get a job."

"Stay  _here?!_ And risk you exposing me-"

"I already told you Zim, no one believes me. And so long as you don't try to kill me or take over the world, then I won't bother you anymore."

"Dib, I doubt that it's possible for you not to bother me. Your very existence bothers me."

"You know what I mean."

Zim grew quiet for a moment.

Dib still wasn't looking at him, so he couldn't really see his expression, but he imagined that it was a pensive, thoughtful look.

"I don't know. If I go to Irk, I'll probably be killed. But if I stay here, it's just a constant reminder of my... my failure. And I'm probably wanted as an outlaw on any Irken-owned planets, which is like, most of the Andromeda galaxy. I… don't have anywhere to go."

Dib couldn't say he completely understood what Zim was going through, but he definitely related. His whole childhood he had felt trapped as Earth's sole savior, and despite how many times he's shown undeniable proof of the existence of aliens, no one ever believed him. Not even his own father, who liked to pretend that he had actually  _been there_  for his family. "Look, Zim, I'm not gonna try and tell you what to do, but it'd probably be better if you stayed on Earth. You could get yourself killed if you try to go back to Irk. And it's not like your leaders are going to be coming here any time soon. At least here you're safe."

"Stupid Dib. If I'm exiled, then by law I  _have_ to stay here. I don't really have much of a choice."

"...Oh. So… that's it then? No argument?"

Zim narrowed his eyes, preparing to slam the door in his face.

"Wait a minute! Does this mean that… you're done trying to take over Earth?!"

Zim's antennae flattened against his head. "An invader never stops until their mission is complete, Dib-beast. If you think that this will discourage the mighty  _Zim_ , then you are  _sorely mistaken._ Who knows, maybe I'll decide to conquer this planet as a gift for my Tallest to earn back their favor?" he suggested, a hint of a smirk present on his face.

Dib grinned. "I'd like to see you try. But you won't,  _Zim,_  I  _know_  you won't. You've spent way too much time on this planet to give it up to anyone else, even your leaders. Face it, right now you're all bark and no bite."

"Oh I'll bark  _and bite Dib, just you wait."_ And with that, the door was slammed shut, Zim's menacing (and annoying) laughter sounding from the other side.

* * *

"Welcome everyone, to the 'Zim is Over' celebration!"

The crowd went wild with cheers and hollers. The two leaders stood atop a large silver platform, with smoke from the smoke machines billowing at their feet and laser lights of all different colors flashing throughout the arena. Both of them waved enthusiastically to the overly excited crowd, before Tallest Purple proceeded to spread his arms out wide in a grandiose gesture, clearing his throat to quiet the crowd. "We've invited you all here today for a special surprise celebration honoring the exile of Invader Zim!"

"We finally managed to successfully rid ourselves of him, and now, the Empire and Operation Impending Doom Two are safe!" Tallest Red declared, earning another wave of cheers and shouts from all across the crowd.

"We do owe Zim  _some_ gratitude," Tallest Purple begrudgingly admitted, "because if it hadn't been for him, we would've never had an excuse to throw a party! But now that he's gone for good, there is nothing standing in our way anymore. With Zim out of the picture, we can now continue without fear!"

"And so, soldiers, celebrate now, because soon, the Armada moves towards the next phase of our mission! Treat yourselves to some of the complimentary nachos!" Tallest Red gestured over to the long tables where piles upon piles of fresh nachos sat untouched.

The crowd cheered once more before loud music began blaring through the speakers.

"I  _told_  you," Tallest Red said in a hushed tone once they exited the stage, "laser lights are where it's at."

Tallest Purple clicked his tongue in annoyance. "Yeah right. They obviously liked the smoke machines best."

"M-My Tallest!" A short, stocky Irken scurried over to where they were standing, bowing and wiggling his antennae as a form of salute.

Tallest Red and Purple exchanged confused stares. They looked at the smaller Irken as if he were alien to them, like they had never seen such a creature in their lives.

"What do  _you_  want?" Tallest Purple asked, poorly concealed  _venom_  dripping into his voice.

"M-My Tallest, I-I come bearing a request from the Control Brains. They asked to speak to you."

Tallest Red narrowed his eyes at the smaller Irken. "The Control Brains?! What could they possibly want now?"

"I… I don't know, but they said it was urgent and that they wanted to speak to you both immediately."

Tallest Purple sighed melodramatically. "Fine, let's just get this over with. You know, being the Almighty Tallest is great and all, but I thought one of the perks was not taking orders from anyone."

"Me too," Tallest Red agreed. "But it must be important. The Control Brains never speak to us unless it's an emergency."

The two leaders exchanged bored glances before sighing once more. "Let's go," they muttered simultaneously as they made their way to the control room.

The control room reminded Tallest Red of a large, highly advanced technological crypt. Dark and spacious and seemingly empty until you reached the area where the Control Brains were stationed.

**_"Tallest Red, Tallest Purple,"_**  the first Control Brain bellowed in a distinctly male voice,  ** _"welcome."_**

The Irken leaders wiggled their antennae as a show of respect. "We're…  _honored_  to be in your presence."

_"We have called you here in regards to your recent decision on the Irken known as Zim,"_  the second Control Brain said. The voice clearly sounded female, but it was just as monotone and devoid of emotion as the voice of the first Control Brain.

"Yes, uh, we told him the truth. Now he knows for sure that he is exiled and cannot return to Irk," Tallest Purple explained.

"Yes, and there's no possible way he can return without breaking Irken law," Tallest Red added nervously.

**_"Irken Zim has broken many laws,"_**  the first Control Brain said.  ** _"The threat of execution is nothing to Irken Zim."_**

The Control Brains were never this cryptic or hard to figure out. They were always blunt and straight to the point, as per their programming. Something wasn't right. "S-So uh… what are you trying to say?" Tallest Red asked, growing more uncomfortable by the second.

_"Based off of the diagnostics tests we ran on Irken Zim's PAK, we concluded that he is not only a threat to the Empire, but a threat to all life in the universe,"_  the second Control Brain explained.

"Zim?! A threat to all life in the universe?!" Tallest Purple threw his head back with raucous laughter. "That idiot couldn't even take over a simple planet like Earth, what makes you think that he's a threat to the universe?!"

**_"Observe. The results of Irken Zim's personality test,"_**  the first Control Brain said. An image of what looked like a document of some sort appeared on the monitor.

"Yeah? What about them?" Tallest Red inquired, halfheartedly skimming through the document onscreen.

**_"Irken Zim's personality data is indicative of a potential rebellion. His reckless and hyperactive behavioral tendencies, alongside his egotistical nature and deep fear of failure, is a deadly combination. He also has access to Irken weaponry,"_**  the first Control Brain explained.

_"Irken Zim is a defective; he is unable to keep these... emotions under control. He has proven time and time again that he is incapable of serving the Irken Empire. Therefore, for the sake of the mission, he must be terminated,"_  the second Control Brain added.

"Well yeah, we know that," Tallest Red quipped. "We've been trying to get rid of him forever, but he doesn't die! Seriously, it's like he's immortal or something!"

"Yeah, and we've already put him on trial!  _That_ didn't even work! What more can we do?" Tallest Purple demanded impatiently.

_"Irken Zim is unable to be terminated by PAK deletion. An alternative method must be used."_

"Alternative method?! If his PAK can't be deactivated or detached, then there's no possible way to kill him! He'll weasel out of it somehow, he always does!"

_"This is a direct order. Find an alternative method to terminate Irken Zim, or your reign as Tallest ends,"_ the second Control Brain ordered.

The two Irken leaders swallowed thickly, exchanging nervous glances. "…Yes. We'll find a way to terminate him."

* * *

"Gaz, where are you off to so late?"

"Out, dad," she answered simply. "Dib's taking me over to my friend's house. I'm gonna stay there for the weekend."

"Very well then. Be safe, love you!" The monitor then darted into the living room where Dib was getting ready. "Son! Don't forget to pick up your sister on Sunday, okay?"

"Yeah dad, I got it."

"Good. Oh! Looks like I have to go, one of my colleagues is calling me. I'll call you later."

The floating monitor suddenly went black. Dib sighed as he pulled on his trenchcoat, reaching for his keys that sat on the nightstand. "Hey, you ready?"

Gaz emerged from the kitchen, slinging her bookbag over her shoulder. "Yeah. Let's go."

They stepped out into the warmth of the summer evening. This wasn't Dib's favorite time of the year, but he always appreciated the relaxing and comfortable temperatures of summer nights. It was much more refreshing than the sweltering heat of daytime.

"You know," Dib started as he got into the driver's seat, "you're gonna have to tell dad eventually."

"Shut up," was Gaz's ever so eloquent response as she seated herself in the passenger seat, reaching for her seatbelt. Dib couldn't help but notice that Gaz wasn't donning her usual gothic dark clothes, and had instead opted for a simple t-shirt and jeans combo.

"I really don't think it's gonna be a big deal. Dad's pretty easygoing. He'll understand."

"Yeah, and he'll be super fucking pissed if he finds out I've been lying to him to go see my boyfriend, and I really don't want to deal with that."

"I still can't believe you even  _have_  a boyfriend," Dib mumbled under his breath as he proceeded to back out of the driveway. "So, what is he? Insane or stupid?"

"The only reason I'm not ripping your limbs off right now is because you need them to drive, Dib. Keep that in mind."

Dib felt an involuntary shudder creep up his spine. "Yeah, okay. Shutting up now."

Despite his words, he  _had_  actually met Gaz's boyfriend a couple times. He seemed like a nice enough guy, but not at all her type, if she even  _had_ a type. Dib had always thought that no one in the human race could ever interest Gaz. Hell, he didn't think she was capable of possessing genuine feelings towards another person. Turns out he had been pleasantly surprised. He hadn't bothered to give him the "if you hurt my sister I'll kill you" speech, knowing full-well that Gaz could handle herself. He found himself actively worrying for the poor boy instead. If he did  _anything_  to upset Gaz, then he'd be in for a world of suffering.

"So uh… remind me again how you guys started dating."

_"Again?"_

"Sorry, it still baffles me that I can say I'm driving you to your  _boyfriend's house."_

Gaz shot him a death glare. "He said he liked my aura of darkness, whatever  _that_ means, I said I liked his hair, it went from there. Now shut up, I like this song." She reached for the radio and cranked up the volume.

When they reached his house, he was outside immediately, knowing better than to keep Gaz waiting. She grabbed her book-bag and prepared to open the door, but was stopped when Dib placed his hand on her shoulder.

"Hey."

"What?" she asked through clenched teeth.

"Use protection," he jeered with a snarky grin.

He didn't miss the way her cheeks flushed ever so slightly. "…I will destroy you," she muttered darkly before stepping out of the car.

"Have fun!" Dib called out, waving at both her and her boyfriend through the open passenger seat window. "Hey Ryan!"

Ryan awkwardly waved back. "Hey Dib!"

"Don't talk to him," Gaz snapped before turning to head inside. Ryan offered Dib a small smile before waving again and following his girlfriend inside.

Now that Dib thought about it, Ryan  _really_ didn't look like Gaz's type. He was blonde and his hair just barely reached his shoulders. He wore glasses and his nose was covered in a smattering of light freckles. And while Dib wouldn't call him muscled by any means, he wasn't terribly scrawny either.

Oh, well. He guessed that he had no right to judge. It was her love life, after all. At least she  _had_ one. Compared to Dib's nonexistent love life, she had quite the exciting one. Well, he couldn't say it was  _totally_  nonexistent, he had a girlfriend or two and even a boyfriend during high school, but none of them were really serious relationships that lasted more than six months.

Sure, Dib was sorely lacking in that department, but he'd never let it bother him before because it simply wasn't his concern.  _Saving the Earth_ had been his concern then. But seeing Gaz being…  _somewhat_ happier now that she had found someone was starting to make him miss interaction with others. Not only did he have no current lover to speak of, but he also had just about zero friends.

_I really need a social life._

He was getting older now, and he was starting to grow tired of this constant game of cat and mouse with Zim. He wanted to go to college, to hang out with friends, to be in a real relationship. But there was still that large part of him that rejected the idea of something so mundane. Ever since meeting Zim and being exposed to a brand new world, he'd wanted to go on adventures, see the wide expanse of outer space, maybe meet another alien species. His love of the paranormal had never faded; in fact, Zim's existence alone made it stronger than ever.

He could only keep up this game for so long. But with Zim's next move being unpredictable as usual, he couldn't risk giving in now; despite how badly he sometimes wished they could just sign a treaty and be done with it.

Zim. Why did everything always have to be about Zim? Why couldn't it be about  _Dib,_ just once? Why couldn't Zim have been a normal human? Why'd he have to be some  _stupid_  alien from  _stupid_  outer space? Maybe, if Zim were a normal human kid just like everyone else, they wouldn't be destined to hate each other. Maybe they'd even be friends.

The idea of him and Zim ever having a normal friendship was laughable to him. But even so, Dib couldn't say that he'd reject the idea of friendship completely. After all, who was he to be denying friends?

_I'm considering befriending an alien hell-bent on taking over Earth. Yup, I definitely need a social life._


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Hey guys, so sorry for the late update.
> 
> Recently, I lost a family member that I was very close with. And as difficult as it has been for me personally, it has also been hard on my family, so I have been trying as best as I can to be there for my family. I've also been drowning in college work, and I've been trying to catch up on the work I've missed since all of this happened.
> 
> Anyway, enough depressing talk. I have a special announcement to make!
> 
> I've decided to create a comic to go along with this fic! The first page will be posted around the time that this fic is finished, which should be by either the end of March or early April. For more information and updates, please check out my tumblr and my instagram. ^^
> 
> Instagram: haileydoesart
> 
> Tumblr: hailsdoesart
> 
> And without further adieu, I bring you all chapter seven! Thank you all so much for being patient!

_"Ideas_ , people, we need ideas!" Tallest Purple slammed his hands down onto the table, the weight of his gauntlets forming dents in the metal table. "Enough with the silence! How do we kill Zim?!"

Tallest Red also stood from his chair, looming over the frightened Irken soldiers menacingly. "You are the best assassins we have, and you're telling us that  _none_  of you know how to kill Zim?!"

"S-Sirs, Zim has proven time and time again that he is impossible to kill," an Irken soldier muttered quietly.

"We cannot take him out with force," another soldier added. "Not only will we alert the natives, but Zim is also armed with Irken weaponry. It'd be full-scale war-"

Tallest Red leaned over the table until he was face-to-face with the smaller Irken. Cold, ruby eyes narrowed into dangerous slits, clashing with bright magenta orbs. "I don't care if we have to blow planet Earth out of the Milky Way galaxy.  _All_  of you  _will_ go to Earth, and you  _will_ kill Zim. Is that clear?"

The Irken soldiers all rose to their feet and saluted dutifully, wiggling their antennae. "Yes, my Tallest!"

"M-My Tallest, if I may make a suggestion?"

All heads in the room turned to the doorway, where a moderately tall female Irken stood, wearing a labcoat over her uniform. She wiggled her antennae in salute. "Please forgive my intrusion, my Tallest. I know that the science department was not invited to this meeting, but as I was passing by, I couldn't help but overhear. And… I do believe I have a plan that might work."

Tallest Red and Purple looked at each other, almost as if silently asking the other for approval, before they both grinned.

"Oh, it's no problem at all," Tallest Purple said with a dismissive wave of his hand.

"Yes, come in. Introduce yourself, and then tell us about this plan you have."

The Irken scientist awkwardly made her way to the front of the room, adjusting the goggles sitting atop her head. "M-My name is Atra, and I work in the science and engineering field. It is my understanding that Zim is a threat to the Empire and you are seeking a way to kill him. And seeing as how it is impossible to eliminate Zim using force, there may be an alternative."

"Go on," Tallest Red and Purple simultaneously urged.

"A virus," she stated simply. "A virus that infects the PAK and eventually shuts down all systems over time."

"A virus?" Tallest Purple queried. "But the PAK's have a firewall automatically built in. Our technology is flawless!"

"The theory is farfetched," she admitted, "but like some biological viruses, a computer virus can easily disguise itself as something recognizable. After the virus has successfully infiltrated the PAK, it will work to destroy all the operating systems. Eventually, it will shut down completely. It will take a lot of work, but I'm confident that if we can  _create_  a PAK, then we can just as easily destroy one."

"That sounds great, but how are we supposed to infect Zim with a virus?" Tallest Red asked.

"There are several ways to infiltrate a PAK, as it is surprisingly vulnerable to foreign contaminants and other external threats, but the virus would be disguised as a microscopic chip inserted into one of the PAK's ports," she explained.

"Very well," Tallest Purple declared. "Atra, if you can successfully create this virus, then you will be rewarded vastly."

Atra gasped. "M-Me?! You want…  _me_ to create it?!"

"Why not? You have the concept down, and you're a scientist aren't you? This should be a piece of cake for you!"

"B-But, I... um-"

"Don't worry, we'll provide you with any and all tools that you may need," Tallest Red said reassuringly.

Atra stood at attention, trying her best to appear more confident to her leaders. "O-Okay… it'll take me a few days to create it. I'm going to need… a crew of up to ten people, and access to the main lab."

"Done and done! All of you are dismissed. Report back to your stations."

With another respectful salute, the clumsy Irken stumbled out of the room, the highly trained assassins quickly following after her.

"Are you sure... that was a good idea?" Tallest Red asked. "Are we doing the right thing?"

"What, you mean killing Zim?" Tallest Purple questioned casually. He clicked his tongue. "Don't tell me you're having second thoughts now."

"What? No." Tallest Red shook his head. "No, that's not it... it's just... trusting a Smaller like that... we don't even know her. She's not an assassin, not even a solider! And the way she talked about Irken PAK's... something about her rubs me the wrong way."

"We don't really have a choice. Our positions are on the line, in case you haven't noticed," Tallest Purple sternly reminded him. "I hate to admit it, but she's sort of our last hope."

"Yes... if we fail, the Control Brains will re-encode our PAK's... we might even be banished for failure to comply..."

"Don't talk like that." The cold and harshness that had entered his features was gone, replaced with nothing but pure confidence and a hint of warmth. "That won't happen. We're the Tallest, remember?"

"But this position... is so fragile," Tallest Red replied. "In just a second, this power can be taken away and transferred to someone else-"

"Whoa, where is all this coming from? Relax. If we show concern, everyone else will just get worried. And that's when the rumors will  _really start._ We have  _at least_ another 300 years."

Tallest Red met his co-leader's eyes and sighed, releasing the tension that had been built up for the past few days. "Very well, I guess you're right. Come on, let's go see if there's any nachos left from that party."

"Sure, but first, let's make a quick phone call..."

* * *

"Gir, what season are we on?"

"Uh… six, I think."

"And just  _how_  many seasons are there?"

"Uh… twenty-seven!"

"Twenty-seven?! Gir, I don't have time to sit through twenty seven seasons of...  _this!_ " Zim gestured to the TV with a disgusted expression. He had been on the couch for what felt like weeks. Had it really been that long?

"The moose and I watched the whole series ten times now!" Gir declared proudly.

Zim looked over at Minimoose, who was watching the TV with an engrossed, intense stare. "That's… not really surprising to me, actually."

The robot shushed him, pressing a tiny metal hand to his mouth. "Shh! The next episode's comin' on!"

Clearly annoyed, Zim batted Gir's hand away. "Whatever, it's not even that good anyway. I'm gonna… go make a sandwich or something."

"Ohhhh, can I have one?!"

"No."

"Aww, man!"

He stood up from the couch and made his way into the kitchen, leaving Gir to the...  _atrocity_  on that screen. Seriously, six seasons in and no character development?  _Boring and predictable._ Not to mention that the characters were tolerable at best. All this talk of 'friendship' made Zim want to rip out his antennae. It's no surprise to him that Earth television is terrible, just like everything else on this cruddy planet.

Truth be told, as of right now, he was at a loss. He used to be so good at conjuring up evil plans within a matter of minutes. Now? There was nothing. And any idea that he  _did_  come up with, he rejected or ultimately just never finished. He'd never experienced this lack of motivation before, at least not since Dib decided to (temporarily) quit chasing after him. But that wasn't exactly the case this time, so what was holding him back?

Since he had no evil plans to work on and there was nothing better to do, Zim ultimately decided to surrender himself to twenty-one more seasons of whatever Gir and Minimoose were watching. He was about to make his way back into the living room before he heard the computer's loud, robotic voice blaring throughout the house.

_"Alert, alert! Incoming transmission from the Almighty Tallest!"_

"The Tallest?! The Tallest are calling me? But why? They told me never to contact them again! So why would they-"

_"I don't know, but they're calling you. Do you wish to answer?"_

Zim didn't really give himself much time to think about it before ordering the computer to take him down to the lab so he could answer the call. When he accepted the call, he was quite surprised to see his two leaders practically beaming at him. It was rather strange compared to their usual bored expressions that he was met with when he called them.

_"Hello Zim!"_  they both said simultaneously.

"Um… hello?" Zim shakily replied, unsure of how to respond.

_"How's our favorite invader doing?"_  Tallest Red asked, grinning broadly.

_Favorite invader? That's a new one._  "I'm… fine…" he answered hesitantly. "My Tallest, Zim can't help but wonder why you're-"

_"Just checking up on you!"_  Tallest Purple said.

Tallest Red nodded.  _"Yes, we wanted to make sure that you were okay, so we could…"_  he trailed off, almost frantically looking over at the other Irken leader.

_"…invite you to the party!"_  Tallest Purple finished.

"Party?" Zim cocked his head in confusion. "What party? And why are you inviting me?"

_"It's a party for you! To honor you and all of your…_   _achievements,"_ Tallest Red explained.  _"You see Zim, we feel_ really bad _about what we said, and… we want to make it up to you."_

Zim's antennae perked slightly at those words. "You… do?"

_"Of course!"_  Tallest Purple exclaimed.  _"Yes, we just feel terrible. We're… sorry for what we said Zim, so what do you say?"_

"But… you said that I am  _defective…_ so how can I-"

_"I-If you come to the party, we'll fix your defect!"_  Tallest Red declared.

_That_  seemed to really catch the smaller Irken's attention. "Wait. Really? That can be done? I've spent hours trying to find a way to fix the emotional stabilizer in my PAK, but-"

_"Yup! It's an easy fix, no worries!"_

A wide, almost childish spread across the Irken invader's face. "Thank you, thank you so much my Tallest! I am pleased that you are finally recognizing Zim's skills as an invader, and I am very honored that you have decided to celebrate me and my achievements. I promise, you won't regret your decision! An upgraded PAK would only enhance my already spectacular invading skills!"

Tallest Purple awkwardly cleared his throat.  _"Y-Yes, well, we're glad to do this for you. A ship will arrive in three days to pick you up. Be ready."_

"Yes, my Tallest, as you wish! Zim never lost faith in you, not once! I knew this day would come! Ah- I must prepare! This is Zim, signing off! I will see you shortly!"

Grinning devilishly, Zim reached for the microphone. "GIR! Minimoose! Come down here immediately! We have work to do."

* * *

"That was… easier than I expected," Tallest Red quipped as the transmission ended.

"Now then, we need someone to retrieve Zim…" Tallest Purple hummed in thought. He searched the room, ready to just send out a random soldier, but was pleasantly surprised when he heard a familiar feminine voice.

"I'd be happy to go, my Tallest," Atra said shyly. "I've always wanted to be able to explore other planets."

"Is the virus ready?" Tallest Red asked, eyeing her suspiciously.

"Yes… almost."

"Almost?"

She ducked her head shamefully in fear of having disappointed her leaders. "It, um… has a few kinks that we're still working out. But it will most definitely be complete by the time Zim gets here. I have my crew working nonstop to finish it."

"Good. Then yes, if you wish, you may retrieve Zim. But remember, this is a retrieval mission, not an observation. You have exactly six days. Three to get to Earth, and three to come back to the Massive with Zim. Understood?"

Atra bowed her head. "Yes, my Tallest. Understood."

"Hey, pilot guy!" Tallest Purple called over his shoulder. "Prepare a ship for the lady!"

"Yes my Tallest!"

* * *

His dad  _used_  to be good at providing for him and Gaz. There was always food in the house and clothes on their backs. He would always buy them whatever they wanted for Christmas and their birthdays. It hardly made up for his constant absence, but it would be a lie to say that Membrane didn't provide for his children. And he at least made an  _attempt_ at times to be present for things like parent-teacher night.

But as he and Gaz got older and eventually became self-sufficient, Membrane didn't really feel the need to be around as much. Dib was eighteen, with a car and a driver's license, and Gaz was seventeen and already working a job. But they were both still living at home, so more often than not, it was Dib who was stuck buying groceries and taking care of the household chores. Gaz, while she did help from time to time, was more concerned with taking care of her own needs before worrying about Dib's or even her father's.

And that was unfortunately why he found himself at the convenience store, looking for something cheap and easy to get for dinner. Dib didn't exactly have a steady job like Gaz, but he had saved up some money over the years by helping out on small private paranormal investigations. Besides, he didn't need to make anything extravagant anyway.

He eventually settled on a frozen pizza and a bag of tater tots, figuring that that would be enough for one night. But as he made his way up to the register to pay, he couldn't help but notice a familiar head of black hair casually strolling through the aisles.

"Zim?" Dib questioned curiously. "The hell are you doing here?"

Over the years, Zim's disguise had gotten better. While it was still painfully obvious that he was an alien, he had started wearing more human clothes, and he had learned to style his wig to look more natural.

"Dib-stink," he sneered. "Figures I'd find you in a filthy place like this."

Dib knew that Zim was trying to insult him, but he just couldn't take the guy seriously considering what he was wearing. His outfit wasn't exactly bad per se, but since Zim was so small, he couldn't properly fill out the navy blue t-shirt he was wearing. He cut a hole in the back of the shirt for his PAK, and it was  _painfully_  obvious, like he'd cut it with a pair of scissors. He'd opted to keep his leggings (at least, that's what Dib assumed they were) on, which was probably a good idea since Zim's waist would never be wide enough to fill a proper pair of pants. His wig had also since been swapped out for a similar but longer wig that properly framed his face.

_Actually_ , now that Dib thought about it, Zim looked…  _good._ In a weird- no,  _really weird way._

"What are you doing here?" Dib asked again.

Zim rolled his eyes. "Gir wanted snacks for the trip. Minimoose just really likes the convenience store."

This caught Dib's attention. "Trip? What trip?"

"Oh… yes, I haven't told you, have I?" Zim smirked and cleared his throat, standing at attention and puffing out his chest. "Zim is taking a little vacation."

Dib raised a brow, eyeing Zim curiously. "A vacation? I didn't know Irkens needed vacations. Where are you going?"

"We  _don't need_  vacations," he clarified. "But the almighty Tallest have contacted me and practically begged for me to come back! They told me that they missed me and that they're throwing a celebration in my honor!"

The feeling of amusement immediately switched to one of confusion. "A celebration? The  _Tallest?"_

Zim nodded proudly. "Yes, it seems that the Tallest have finally recognized my greatness. They are going to be here in three days to retrieve me."

"The Armada is coming here?!" Dib shouted, way louder than he probably should have.

Zim chuckled and waved a dismissive hand. "Oh no, Dib-filth, you misunderstand. The Armada is not coming to destroy Earth, at least, not yet. We'll do that  _after_  my celebration."

Anger swelled inside Dib, fingers digging into the bag of tater tots he was holding. "You'll do  _what?"_

That shit-eating grin was back on his face, the one that Dib hadn't seen in quite a long time. The one he  _couldn't stand._ "Oh yes,  _Dib,_ perhaps you should start counting, because now that the Tallest have reinstated Zim's mission, your planet's days are numbered."

The pizza box and the bag of tater tots fell onto the floor as Dib's hands clenched into fists. Betrayal, fury, confusion, all of those negative emotions swirled inside him, growing more and more intense by the second. "You son of a bitch," he mumbled lowly. "Did any of what I said mean  _anything_  to you?"

"Um…" Zim paused to think, his antennae twitching, "what did you say to me again?"

"Idiot, I told you that you're  _free_ now. Do you really think your leaders all the sudden want you back? That makes no sense! It's a  _trap-_ "

"How dare you speak so disrespectfully of my Tallest!" Zim snapped, stepping closer to Dib. "My Tallest would never trap me. They're having a party to congratulate me! They even offered to fix my defect!"

_"God,_ Zim you really are an idiot sometimes. Did you not pay attention to anything they said before? They laughed in your face, yet you wanna go crawling back to them like a moron?"

"They are my Tallest. I must follow their orders," was Zim's ever so simple response.

Dib shook his head, hoping that he could still reason with the Irken. "You don't have to, Zim. You don't. Just walk away now while you still can! Tell your leaders that you're not interested- they're just trying to trick you! You were there when I called them, do you really think that all the sudden they wanna be buddy-buddy with you? Listen, Zim, I know you don't trust me, and I get it, but you have to believe me when I tell you that-"

_"Enough!"_ Zim reached up and slammed Dib against the shelves with a gloved hand pressed against his chest. Even though Zim was significantly smaller than him, Dib found himself powerless, unable to move. "We may have had our little truce Dib, and I may have let you in on a few of my secrets, but don't go thinking that that makes us friends. If I have the Armada at my side, then nothing will stop me! Not even  _you."_

Noticing that they were starting to draw a crowd, Dib muttered a curse under his breath and grabbed Zim's wrist, roughly dragging him out the door and towards the side of the building.

Dib released him, folding his arms across his chest. "So that's it then. Just like that, we're back to square one?"

Zim nursed his arm, rubbing the sore spot from where Dib had been pulling on it. "We never left square one."

"Don't you dare lie to me, Zim." Dib jabbed a finger in the alien's face. "We were friends and you know it! So don't you dare try to take that from me!"

_"Friends?"_  Zim scoffed. "As if I would ever be friends with the Dib-beast. How many times must I tell you that  _invaders need no one?_ Attachments and companionship are useless to an Irken."

"You could've killed me," Dib pointed out. "Face it Zim, you don't really want me dead. If you did, you would've done it a long time ago. Like it or not, you  _need_  me."

"Perhaps," Zim admitted. "But the only reason I ever kept you alive was so my evil plans wouldn't be quite so boring."

"It's  _more_  than that," Dib argued. "Do you think I'm stupid? You think I haven't noticed how your 'evil plans' were less about taking over the world and more about getting back at me?"

"Oh, so you think everything Zim does revolves around the Dib, huh?! Well I have news for you, _it doesn't._ You have called me selfish plenty of times, but maybe you should take a look in the mirror first."

Dib fisted his hand in Zim's t-shirt, pulling him closer. In doing so, he somehow managed to lift him off his feet. "You don't get to call  _me_  selfish, Zim. Not after all of the shit you've pulled. Face it. You  _do need me._ That's why you haven't killed me. If you were really serious about this, you would've done it years ago."

Zim averted his gaze. "Release me now."

"No."

"I'll make good on my promise to end you right here if you don't let me go."

"No. You won't."

"Dib-"

"Do it," he ordered, his voice daring and strangely inviting. "I've got no tricks up my sleeve. No weapons. I'm totally defenseless. There's nobody around, not now. So go ahead." He inched closer to his face.  _"Do it."_

A flush of anger settled across Zim's face. Enraged, he reared his leg back and kicked Dib's midsection,  _hard._ Dib released him, stumbling backwards, clutching his stomach in pain. But he didn't have time to recover before Zim was on him again, knocking him to the ground. Zim's metal PAK legs pressed hard against his wrists, successfully pinning him to the ground. "To instigate me is a bad,  _bad move._ I am an Irken invader. I am an elite soldier with more experience than all of your human military members  _combined_ , I've lived longer than  _any_  human being, and I will  ** _not allow you to make a mockery of me!"_**

Another PAK limb inched towards Dib's face, the metal tip closing in on his forehead. Dib could only smirk.  _"That's_  more like the Zim I know."

Zim ignored the offhanded comment. "Any last words, Dib-stink?"

"Yeah. Just three."

"What three words?"

"Chemistry, eleventh grade."

Zim abruptly froze.

"I know you know what I'm talking about," Dib continued. "Eleventh grade chemistry class. You remember, don't you?"

"Y-Yes… but I don't see what that has to do with-"

"It was the day things started to change. It was the day... we started to see each other as friends."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor, naive Zim.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Henceforth, Red and Purple will be referred to as just 'Red' and 'Purple', even though that bothers me a little. Writing out 'Tallest Red' and 'Tallest Purple' is a little much, both for me and probably for my readers too.
> 
> Enjoy chapter eight!

_"I still can't believe I'm stuck with_ you _for a partner," Zim grumbled, huffing indignantly. "Why can't I work alone?"_

_"Would you quit whining? I don't like it any more than you do," Dib snapped back in response. He should have figured that it would only be a matter of time before he would inevitably be forced to work with Zim on something. He was surprised that it hadn't happened already. But what made this ten times worse was that partners in chemistry were permanent, meaning that the two of them were stuck together for the rest of the semester._

_"But I am far more superior in science than any of these human pigsmellies."_

_It wasn't exactly an inaccurate statement. Zim had surprisingly landed himself in AP Chemistry alongside Dib. While biology and environmental sciences weren't exactly his strong suit, he had shown a remarkable talent for chemistry and physics, thus earning him a spot in the AP course._

_"If you're gonna keep bitching about it, then just drop out already. You don't really need to be here, you know. Surely you've done enough 'observing' by now."  
_

_"Fool-boy, Zim does not have to explain himself to you! Besides, I can easily handle a stupid Earth-project."_

_"Really?" Dib grinned, gesturing to the materials laying on their shared desk. "Then by all means, show me how it's done, o wise one."_

_Dib had expected Zim to go on some sort of long tangent about how superior he was, but he was shocked to find that instead, he was looking away from Dib, and his cheeks had taken on a strange purple hue._

_"Very well, stink-meat. Zim will-"_

_"Hey, what's wrong with your face? I mean, besides the usual," Dib interrupted. He scooted closer, pointing at the vibrant violet color that had spread across his face. "It's all purple."_

_"Silence, Dib-worm," Zim muttered irritably. "Nothing is wrong with my face. My face is fine. My face is more than fine, it's wonderful!"_

_Dib cocked a brow, obviously confused, but decided against further questioning. "Well, there's no sense in wasting any time. Let's look at what we have to do."_

_Zim reached over and snatched the paper from Dib's hands, quickly skimming over it. "Lichtenburg? Who's Lichtenburg? Whoever they were, they had a stupid last name."_

_"It's the name of the experiment, genius. We have to make Lichtenburg Figures."_

_"…Right. Of course."_

_Needless to say, the project had went surprisingly well. Despite their occasional bickering, they managed to complete the assignment much earlier than their classmates. Dib was relieved; this meant that now he had time to work on other assignments._

_"You are not going to show Zim any gratitude for assisting you, Dib-monkey?"_

_Dib sighed. "Oh thank you Zim for helping me. I am ever so grateful," he said flatly before returning his attention to his algebra homework._

_"That didn't sound very sincere," Zim said under his breath, clearly unsatisfied. If Dib weren't paying attention to his homework then he would've noticed the slight pout on the Irken's face._

_"I'm busy. Don't you have homework to do?"_

_"Silly Dib-thing. Zim never bothers with homework."_

_"Which is why it amazes me that you have good grades."_

_Zim laughed haughtily. "Easy. Because my instructors realize that not rewarding me for my intelligence by giving me good grades would be downright foolish."_

_"Right. Well, go do something else. I'm a little preoccupied here."_

_Shockingly, Zim was quiet for the rest of class. He let Dib work in peace, entertaining himself by either playing on his phone or doodling on the back of their worksheets. When Dib would occasionally glance over at him, he noticed that Zim's doodles were only mildly disturbing. They mostly consisted of Zim on a throne being worshipped by human slaves. But what really caught his eye was a small drawing in the corner of the page that looked oddly familiar._

_"Zim, who's that?" Dib asked, pointing to the figure._

_"What, that? That's you, Dib-fool. Can't you tell?"_

_"It does kind of look like me," Dib admitted. "But why are you drawing me?"_

_Irritated, Zim slammed his hand down on the picture, shoving it onto Dib's side of the desk. "Are your eyes malfunctioning?! Can you not see the artistry? That," he said, pointing to the drawing of himself, "is me, Zim, on a throne, which is where I'll be when I'm finally made ruler of this planet," he explained. He then pointed to the figures surrounding the throne. "And these are all of my slaves, worshipping me like good little humans."_

_"Uh-huh… so where do I fit into all of this?"_

_"You?" Zim grinned mischievously. "In this piece, you are my personal slave. But fear not, this artistic masterpiece will be made into a reality soon enough."_

_Dib rolled his eyes, chuckling. "Dream on, space boy. Like I'd ever be your slave."_

_"Why not?" Zim retorted. "I'd let you live, obviously. Can't you see that I'm being merciful?"_

_Dib could see the genuine confusion present on his face, like he didn't understand how Dib could ever refuse such an offer._

_"Merciful? You call enslaving someone being merciful?"_

_"Yes," Zim answered without hesitation. "You should be grateful, Dib. Believe it or not, I think you could be useful. So when I do take over this pathetic dirtball, I'll keep you around. No need to worry."_

_"Yeah, good luck with that." The bell finally rang, saving Dib from having to hear Zim fantasize about taking over the world. He'd had quite enough of that for one day. "See ya tomorrow, Zim."_

_"Of course you will, Dib. I don't understand how that is-"_

_"It's an expression, Zim, a form of saying goodbye, like- oh, never mind. Later."_

_And with that, he was making his way out the door, Zim following not too far after him. "Hey, wait for me!"_

_Dib paused. "Wait for you? Why?"_

_"…Something's not right with you, Dib-beast. Therefore I, Zim, will accompany you to your human residence. Just to make sure you're not scheming something behind my back."_

_That excuse sounded like complete and total bullshit to Dib, but he decided against questioning it. Zim was just weird sometimes. "…Right." He shrugged. "Whatever. Follow me if you want, I guess."_

* * *

"Fool. We did not become 'friends' as you say."

Dib ignored him, pressing on further. "Ever since that day, it was like… like you stopped trying. And every time the world was in danger from an outside threat, it was you and I that stopped it.  _Together."_

Zim looked disgusted at the accusation. "I did not save Earth because I care about it, I saved Earth because this planet is mine to destroy, no one else's!"

"Come on Zim, when are you going to see the truth?! Maybe... maybe you..."

"What the  _hell_  are you going on about-"

At this point, Dib wasn't even sure where he was going with his words, but they kept tumbling out of his mouth before his brain could stop them. "I mean yeah, you're destructive, there's no doubt about that, but… have you ever thought that the reason you're so bad at destroying Earth is because... maybe you're meant to save it?" he questioned, meeting Zim's eyes curiously.

Zim looked almost surreal, sitting on top of him, the light of the sun framing his face and showing all sorts of different shades of green skin. The artificial hair that sat atop his head shined in the sunlight, a few stray hairs threatening to hang in his eyes as he hovered dangerously close to Dib's face. His expression had softened considerably, his eyes going wide as he processed Dib's words.

"Zim is not…  _bad_  at destroying Earth," he protested weakly.

"Dude, you kind of suck at invading."

"Careful," Zim warned, "you're still at my mercy."

"Zim,  _please_ , if our relationship has meant anything to you over the past few years, anything  _at all_ , then please, don't go. If you go, they're gonna kill you and… and…"

"And  _what?"_

"And… I don't want that to happen. So just this once, let me save you."

_"Save me?!"_ Zim threw his head back and laughed maniacally, but there was almost a strange sadness to it as well, and something else that Dib couldn't pinpoint. "I won't  _need_  saving. But it amuses me to hear such a thing. Save me? Why bother? Why bother with any of this? Why are you trying so desperately to be my friend when you know full well-"

"Because there's no point in this. Maybe we're both a little fucked up and we get some sort of sick satisfaction out of fighting each other, but… I'm  _tired, Zim._ I'm getting older, and I want to move the fuck on with my life. I'm sick of whatever...  _this_  is! It's not getting us anywhere!"

Zim looked like he had been personally offended. "S-Sick of it? Of… of Zim? Of  _me?"_

"To put it bluntly… yes," Dib admitted. "I will always defend the Earth Zim, but this back and forth bullshit has to stop at some point. So right now, you need to make a choice."

_"You_  are giving  _me_ an ultimatum?! Insolent  _human-"_

_"Listen,"_ Dib interrupted. "You can stop all this now, and stay. We'll even sign a treaty if you want. We become friendly rivals at least, and move on with our lives. No more invading or destroying. Or… you can leave, get captured, and be executed. Your call."

Zim worried his bottom lip, as if he were actually considering Dib's offer, before meeting his eyes again with a stern expression. "Yet again, you fail to consider a third option."

"Which is?"

"The Armada comes and lays waste to this lump of rock and dirt."

"That's…  _not going to happen,_ but if it did, then I'd stop you. You know that. We'd all stop you. This planet is a lot more than you think it is, Zim."

Zim chortled, shaking his head. "Oh, poor pitiful Dib, you and that optimism of yours. Zim admired it for a while, but now it's just sad. When will you learn that planet Earth is  _doomed?!"_

Dib sat up then, successfully knocking Zim off of him and onto his back. His PAK made an almost cringe-worthy sound when it made contact with the asphalt. "Fine then, you've made your choice. But when your stupid ass needs saving, don't expect me to come to your rescue. Remember that you chose this!"

"Fine!" Zim shouted back, jumping to his feet, his PAK legs retracting. "Zim takes back everything he said on that day! I will  _not_  spare you Dib; you'll perish just like every other human who defies me!"

"Go ahead and try! I should've known better to assume that just  _maybe_  you weren't as cruel as you let on, but you know what?! I was stupid and I trusted you! And you let me down. So go ahead, run back to your leaders and get killed! See if I care!"

Zim's hands clenched into fists. "I don't care either! Remember what I said Dib, your days are numbered, you hear me?! Your days are  ** _numbered!"_**

The only response Zim received was the squeal of Dib's tires as he sped out of the parking lot.

* * *

"The absolute  _audacity,"_ Zim grumbled as he tossed his wig and contacts onto the floor. "The Dib-beast had the nerve to yell at me, Zim!"

"Master yells all the time!" Gir piped up from his spot on the couch.

"Silence Gir!" He plopped down on the couch next to his robot servant, who was munching on a bag of popcorn. "Who does he think he is, anyway?! Stupid, stupid,  _stupid-!"_

As per his master's orders, Gir did not respond, happily humming to himself as he flipped through the TV guide.

"Acting as though it's  _my_ fault," he continued, ranting to no one in particular as he shoved his hand into the popcorn bag on Gir's lap. "The nerve! I should've killed him right then and there!"

Although, some things that Dib had said were getting to him more than he cared to admit.

_"Ever since that day, it was like… like you stopped trying. And every time the world was in danger from an outside threat, it was you and I that stopped it. Together."_

_"Have you ever thought that the reason you're so bad at destroying Earth is because maybe you're meant to save it?"_

_"And I don't want that to happen. So just this once, let me save you."_

Stupid Dib. Trying to act like he  _cared_ all the sudden. Since when did he care about Zim's wellbeing? Why was he trying so hard to be friendly with him? They were  _enemies,_ always have been, always will be. When had that changed for Dib?

_"Chemistry, eleventh grade."_

Was it that day? That was the day Dib had mentioned, the day that their relationship had started to change for him. It hadn't been that simple for Zim.

He'd noticed that as Dib had gotten older, he had stopped taking his threats seriously. It was like he was blowing him off or doubting him. Sure, occasionally Zim would prove him wrong and Dib would stand in his way  _yet again._ But those occasions were becoming rarer and rarer. It was, in fact, just as Dib had said. He would always defend the Earth, but the game was only fun for so long.

In a strange sort of way, it had become like a game to Zim as well, a game that Zim was happy to play. A game where Dib was his only opponent, his only  _worthy opponent._ He loved it. He loved to see Dib vowing to stop him. He loved to see the look of despair on Dib's face as he revealed his evil plan of the week.

But even Zim knew that he couldn't play this game with Dib forever. Dib was human, and his life was short. He aged quickly, much quicker than Irkens. He grew up fast, and before long, he too would succumb to the mundane desires of humans. Marriage, jobs,  _college_. The thought of Dib doing any of those normal things was almost laughable to Zim. Dib was far from normal, so the thought of him pursuing a normal life after chasing him for so long was highly unbelievable. But could it be that that was what Dib wanted? To dump him in favor of a pitiful, sad, regular life?

The thought of it infuriated him. Dib, his greatest enemy, dumping him for a… a  _mate._ For a  _job._ It shouldn't make him this upset. He should be glad that Dib no longer wished to stand in his way. He should be overjoyed. But he wasn't. He was angry. He was downright  _pissed._ How dare he? How dare he throw away their entire relationship to go do stupid human things? Did he really think that he could just do that? Go off on his own and leave Zim with no enemy? With no… no…

_No one._

Without Dib… Zim had no one.

Why did those words make him feel so afraid? Loneliness was not something an Irken should be capable of feeling. So why was he feeling it now? Why did he feel like he had been betrayed? Abandoned?

_Stupid defect._

_Stupid Dib._

Dib was only making things worse. He was making him…  _feel things._ Confusing things, things he could never begin to understand. He was growing weaker and weaker because of that  _human._

He wouldn't allow Dib to poison him any longer. That's right… if he got away from this planet, from  _Dib,_ then these feelings would have to go away. Besides, the idea that he would even  _consider_  staying for the Dib-beast was laughable. His almighty Tallest had given him an order. He would  _not_ disobey.

"Gir, make sure you are prepared. The Tallest will be arriving in less than 24 hours!"

Everything was falling into place now. He would get away from Dib, go to the celebration, have his defect fixed, and then the human scum would no longer be an issue. Dib would no longer be able to infect him with…  _feelings._ With the Armada at his side, invading this planet would be a piece of cake. He would  _finally_  get the recognition he's deserved all along. He would  _finally_  be taken seriously by his people. After years of being treated like a joke for his size, perhaps now, after conquering a planet of seven billion people, he would be seen as an invader.

"We need to get off this planet, Gir," he said after a few moments of uncomfortable silence. "It's doing things to me."

"I dunno Master, I kinda like it here!"

"You  _like it?!"_

Gir shrugged. "Yeah, I mean, the food's yummy!"

"Whatever. Don't you like  _Irken_  snacks?"

"I like all snacks!"

Zim glared icily at the robot before heading into the kitchen. "I'm going down into the lab for a little bit. Don't disturb me, and don't let anyone in. Especially not the Dib-beast."

Gir's eyes flashed red as he saluted his master. "Yes sir!"

* * *

"Hey, what are we gonna do once Zim's PAK gets deactivated?"

Purple shrugged, tossing the now empty bag of chips to the ground. "I dunno, party?"

Red snorted. "Well,  _obviously._ But I'm referring to the mission."

"Well, I guess the mission will go on as planned. In fact, it should go smoother without Zim around to interrupt. Why? Are you having second thoughts?"

Red snickered, as if the very idea were preposterous. "What? No, no way. It's just that… it's going to be strange, adjusting to life without Zim around to bother us."

"It'll be  _nice,"_ Purple corrected, scooting closer to the other Irken leader. "Just imagine it. No more 'status reports' or begging us for weapons. We've wasted so much time and materials on him. We'll save time  _and_  monies!"

Red rubbed his chin as if in deep thought. Now that he thought about it, a world without Zim  _did_  sound pretty nice. "Yeah, I guess you're right… hey, what was that planet that we sent Zim to again?"

"Earth, or something like that."

"Earth," he repeated. "Hey, you, give us an overview of planet Earth."

A holographic image of the planet appeared before them. A short drone scurried over to where they were sitting and cleared his throat, preparing to give a quick presentation. "Earth is a planet within the Milky Way galaxy. Its size is remarkable, but it is hardly the largest planet within its solar system. It revolves around its sun much faster than Irk revolves around its own, and is much closer."

"Mmhm… and what of the inhabitants? Are they all intelligent?" Red inquired curiously.

"W-Well, not enough data has been collected to make any conclusions, but… probably not. Irken Zim's reports show that the life there is nowhere near intelligent."

"Irken Zim's reports are inaccurate," Purple said lowly. "We spoke to a human male, remember? He was very clearly intelligent. He managed to pilot an Irken ship  _and_  rework the personality interface."

"I-I see… well, we do know that the planet is teeming with life. Humans are not the only species on the planet. It's full of animal and plant life as well. According to the Intergalactic Encyclopedia, Earth operates with ecosystems."

"Yeah, that's great, what about the resources? Is there anything of value?"

"There's not enough data here… we'd have to send out an observation team-"

"That's a great idea!" Red exclaimed joyously. "After we capture Zim, send out an observation team to planet Earth, and report back with your findings."

"B-But sir, that would be violating  _many_ treaty agreements. We can't send soldiers to an unmarked planet-"

"Why not? We sent Zim," Purple pointed out.

"Zim's PAK ID still says food drone, so he is technically not a soldier-"

"We don't care. Prepare an observation team once the Irken Atra returns with Zim," Red muttered dismissively, waving off the smaller Irken.

"Y-Yes, my Tallest!"

Purple watched the drone scurry out of the room before turning to face his co-leader, who had made his way over to the lone window in the room. "What's with you?" he asked. "Earth isn't even worth blowing up, and all the sudden you want to send an observation team?"

"Is there something wrong with being prepared?" Red argued, refusing to so much as look at Purple.

"No, but that drone guy was right. By sending soldiers to unmarked planets, we are violating a lot of treaty agreements," Purple said with a sigh.

"And we both agreed that those treaties were holding the Empire back."

"So what are you trying to do? Start a war?"

"The war's already started, Purple. I'm just exploring all of our options. Besides, when we first became Tallest, didn't we agree that we'd never question each other's decisions?"

"Well maybe some of your  _decisions_  need to be questioned," Purple fired back, glaring heatedly at Red.

"Oh yeah, says the guy who named an entire nebula 'Tallest Purple is Cool'."

"It was  _my turn_ to pick the name! Besides, your names are always stupid. I mean,  _Megadoomer_? Seriously?"

"Hey, that was Spork's idea, not mine! Ugh, whatever," he huffed. "I hate you sometimes, you know that?"

Purple grinned. "Oh please, you do  _not_. You know that there's no one else in this universe you'd rather rule with."

"This bag of chips would make a better leader than you," Red grumbled flatly, pointing to the discarded bag of chips from earlier.

Purple felt as though he should be offended, and a little part of him was, but in the end he brushed it off. They had their little tiffs, but for the most part, they always managed to keep their arguments to a minimum. They were leaders, after all, and they had an image to uphold.

"I have a bad feeling," Red finally admitted. "Ever since Zim found out, things have just been... off."

"You're probably just on edge because of what the Brains said," Purple told him earnestly. "Look, you shouldn't be so worried. The Brains are right. Zim is a threat, and he should've been taken out years ago. We're doing the right thing."

"It's not Zim I'm worried about, it's  _us,_ " he said, his voice uncharacteristically soft and devoid of its usual vivacity. "It's like you said, our positions are on the line!"

"Look," Purple said, annoyed and clearly exasperated, "you need to relax. Let's go get a drink."

"It's a bit late to be drinking, don't you think?"

Purple smirked teasingly. "Eh, a drink or five won't kill you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> soooo... turns out I'm a bit of a sucker for RAPR too. ;;
> 
> Keep in mind that I don't necessarily think the Tallest are 'good', at least not in the traditional sense, but I think that they have their own set of standards, and those standards are going to be whatever is best for the Empire, even if sometimes they aren't very good at their jobs. I wanted to show them actually being leaders for once, because I think when push comes to shove they take action. In IZ, I don't really think 'good' and 'evil' is all that black and white. Zim for example, he tries to be evil, but at the end of the day, he's just not, as his definition of evil is a bit different from ours.
> 
> anyway, enough of my rambling. stay tuned for chapter nine!


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I won't be able to update at all this week (I'm super super behind on work) so surprise! early update!

"Hey, why aren't you over at Zim's house?"

"Not in the mood, Gaz."

Gaz rolled her eyes. "Whatever. But you haven't moved in like eight hours, and your moping is getting on my nerves. What happened? Did he break up with you or something?"

"What-  _break up?!"_  Dib sputtered, cheeks turning five different shades of red all at once. "He's not… we weren't…  _eww!_  Like I would  _ever-"_

Gaz waved him off. "Yeah yeah, whatever. Just quit sitting around and go do something. Besides, you're taking up the whole couch and I want to watch my show."

"What show?"

"The one with the two guys who hunt vampires and demons and stuff."

Dib abruptly sat up. "You mean… you're into a show about the paranormal?"

"It's not a stupid show trying to prove that Mothman and Bigfoot are real, so yes. Now move, it comes on in an hour and I need to catch up on the last episode." Gaz shoved him aside, plopping down on the other end of the couch.

Confused but pleasantly surprised, Dib tossed her the remote, deciding not to prod further.

Gaz was right, he really needed to stop moping. But he feared that if he went out anywhere, he'd end up at Zim's house. That seemed to happen a lot as of late. Whenever Dib would go out, no matter how long he drove around town for, he'd always find himself at Zim's house. But right now, he wanted nothing to do with the alien. If he wanted to go off and get himself killed, then why should he care?

It pissed him off that no matter what he did, he couldn't shake this feeling. Despite his words, he  _wanted_ to save him. He w _anted_ to chase him like his life depended on it, and sometimes it  _did._ He wanted to knock some sense into that stupid head of his. Zim  _had_  to know what he was talking about, and these feelings had to be reciprocated to at least some degree. Zim wasn't completely incapable of emotion, but damn, it sure as hell felt like it sometimes. Perhaps if he wasn't so fucking stubborn and repressed, he'd be less moody.

Then again, Dib didn't have much room to talk when it came to repression.

Damn it all to hell, Dib missed him. As twisted as it was, he even missed their fights. He wanted him back.

"Gaz, I'm going out."

"Where are you going?"

"To find that stupid alien."

When Dib arrived at Zim's house, he debated ( _fought_  is a more accurate term) with himself over whether or not to get out of the car. He'd already said his piece multiple times, so what more needed to be said? What more could he do? But in the end, he figured that since he'd already wasted the gas and the miles to come over, he might as well follow through with it.

Sighing exasperatedly, Dib walked up to the door, mindful of Zim's garden gnomes that doubled as security guards, and knocked. As expected, it was not Zim who answered, but rather Gir, and he seemed to be… preoccupied. In his tiny arms there was what appeared to be a guinea pig.

Deciding not to question it, he shook his head. "Hey, is Zim home?" he asked. He had a feeling that he already knew the answer.

"Yup!" And with that, the robot servant side-stepped to allow Dib entry, skipping back over to the couch where a bowl of popcorn and a soda sat. "Master's right down there!" he said, pointing to the trash can in the kitchen.

Dib couldn't help but think it was a bit degrading, and disgusting, clambering into a trash can that he was obviously much too big for. But he needed to find Zim and quickly, and if this was the best way, then so be it.

The elevator suddenly lurched downward and caused Dib to fall right on his rear end, the door sliding open with a groan. Dib staggered to his feet, searching the area for any sign of the alien. His lab was huge and relatively easy to get lost in. Dib's been in it so many times that he should know it like the back of his hand by now, but the vast unknown technology never failed to amaze him every time.

"Zim?" he called out. "It's me, Dib. I know you probably don't wanna see me right now, but… we should talk."

"I have nothing to say to the likes of you, Dib-beast. Go home."

Startled, Dib jumped in surprise when a pair of ruby eyes met his at eye-level. When he regained his bearings, he realized that Zim was using his PAK legs, which put him at about equal height with Dib.

Dib threw his hands up defensively, just in case Zim had any weapons waiting to strike him down. "Look, I get it, you're pissed. But will you just hear me out one more time? I'm kinda trying to save your life, you know."

Zim clicked his tongue. "As  _if._ I am not falling for your lies anymore. Now get out of here, I'm leaving in just a few hours!"

"Please." Dib was practically begging at this point. "I promise, after this, you won't have to listen to anything else. Hell, you can even start trying to kill me again if you want-"

"Who says I stopped?" he inquired, looming over Dib ominously.

"Oh please, we both know you did. Just… one more time, listen to me. What I'm about to say could save your life, so… just let me give you my spiel, and whatever you decide next, I'll… respect."

Zim eyed him warily for a moment before his PAK legs retreated back inside, causing him to fall and land gracefully on his feet. "Very well. Since I'm feeling generous, I'll allow you to speak. But make it fast!"

Dib nodded, suddenly feeling rather uncomfortable, unsure of how he could even begin. How could he possibly convince him to stay? Appealing to his nonexistent emotions wouldn't work, and it's not like he or the Earth had anything that would interest Zim enough to disobey his Tallest.

_"I'm waiting,_  earth scum."

Oh, well. He didn't really think to plan out a speech, so he would have to improvise.

"Look, Zim, being your arch nemesis and all was fun, it  _is_ fun. But ever since that day, things have changed. You looked at me different, and I looked at you different. And I know you don't think so, but… I could tell. I'm still here because you won't do it. You won't kill me. And the same goes for you. Despite everything I said, I can't… I  _won't_ kill you."

"That's-"

"It's true!" he interrupted, effectively silencing the Irken. "Zim… I don't really know how else to say it. But I don't want to lose you. Because despite how…  _weird and fucked up_ it all is… you are the only person that's ever been anything remotely close to a friend. You've taken my side when no one else did. While everyone else pointed fingers and laughed… you never did. Well, okay, maybe a couple times, but still!" He sighed, uncertain of how to continue. "God, I don't even know what I'm saying anymore. The point is, I will not lose you. Even if we spend the rest of our lives apart, that's fine. But I'm  _not_  going to let you walk right into a death trap. I always used to swear that I was going to be the one to kill you… but now? Now… now I'm willing to travel halfway across the galaxy to save my supposed arch nemesis. Can you really still call us enemies?"

"B-But… we are!" Zim protested weakly. "We have to be! If we are not enemies, then what are we?"

Dib shrugged. "I don't know… acquaintances? Friendly rivals? Frenemies?"

Zim shook his head. "Unacceptable! What must I do, Dib? What do I have to do to prove myself worthy to you? Was I not a good enough opponent for you?!"

"That's not true," Dib fired back. "You are the greatest challenge I have ever had. And as a paranormal investigator, I've seen a lot of shit. But  _you_  by far take the cake."

"Then what is it? Why are you so desperate to befriend me? Can't you see how much easier it is for us to be enemies?!"

"That's  _so like you_ Zim, always taking the easy way out. I already told you why! It's because we can't do this forever! It's because… I… God, I can't believe I'm even saying this, but I  _like you,_ okay? No matter how much I deny it, I  _like you._ Now please, while there's still time, let me help you! Just this once, choose me!"

Dib watched Zim's expression shift. His eyes went wide, and all the sharpness to his features seemed to leave him in an instant. A soft purple flush spread across his cheeks. He averted Dib's gaze, keeping his eyes locked on the floor.

"You…  _like Zim?"_

"…You're an asshole, and you're loud, and you hardly make sense… but yes. I like you. I like being around you. Fighting with you is fun, but when we're together, you know, hanging out like normal people… that's not so bad either. And I want to do more of that. With you. I won't ask you to stop trying to take over the Earth, at least not now, but I  _will_  ask that you don't walk right into an obvious trap. If I have meant  _anything_  to you over the past seven years, as an enemy, a friend,  _whatever,_ then please… just trust me. Just this once."

Zim shifted back and forth on his feet, unsure of what to say. He couldn't even  _look_ at him. He had that conflicted expression again, the one that Dib had seen a few times before but had never questioned.

"Zim feels…  _I feel_ … I-"

_"Master Zim, the Tallest have arrived."_

This broke Zim out of the trance he had been seemingly been put into. "The Tallest are already here?! But they're early! Damn it…"

"Zim." Dib reached down and grabbed the alien's wrist. It was a firm grip, but not hard enough to hurt him. "Please."

For what felt like the first time since he'd been here, Zim locked eyes with Dib. His hand slowly slid up his wrist and interlaced their fingers. It was a strange feeling, given that Zim only had three fingers, but Dib couldn't exactly say he disliked it. Truth be told, he wasn't sure what possessed him to grab his hand. A stupid heat of the moment decision that just  _might_  mean something to the Irken, he supposed. 

Zim eyed their joined hands curiously, and with a hint of something Dib couldn't define, before he tore his eyes away, pulling his hand out of Dib's grasp.

"I am…  _sorry_ , Dib-beast. But I cannot- I  _will_  not disobey my Tallest."

"Zim-"

"No Dib, you don't understand. I  _can't._ Every Irken is taught from a young age to always obey the Tallest. The Tallest have given me a direct order… I cannot disobey. So even if it is a 'death trap' as you say… then…"

"No! Zim, don't be an idiot!"

"Even if it were your so-called 'death trap', then I would escape. Besides… if there is even a slight chance that I can fix my defect-"

_"Sir, the Tallest are growing impatient. They are requesting that you be outside within the next five minutes."_

Zim grabbed the bag of materials that he had prepared and slung it over his shoulder. "I have to go."

"Zim-"

"Did you not say that you would respect my decision?"

"And could  _you_  not tell that I was lying? Zim, don't go out there,  _please-"_

"…Goodbye, Dib. And don't even  _think_ about following me. The Massive will blow you to bits before you can even come close."

With that, the elevator door closed and Zim was sent back up to the main level, leaving Dib alone in his base.

* * *

The first thing that Zim noticed was that it was not, in fact, the Massive that was waiting for him. Rather, it was a small battle cruiser. Surely the Tallest would not be caught dead riding in such a small ship.

When he was teleported onto the ship, he was pleasantly surprised to find that it was slightly bigger on the inside than it appeared to be on the outside. But, his Tallest were nowhere in sight.

"My Tallest?" he called out. "My Tallest, it's Zim! Are you here? I-"

"They aren't here," a smooth female voice interrupted.

Zim turned and was surprised to find a female Irken sitting in the cockpit. She was taller than Zim, but nowhere near tall enough to be an elite. Her skin was a light emerald color, her eyes a bright magenta. She was wearing a lab coat over her pilot uniform, which told Zim that she was from the science and engineering department.

"Science drone. Tell me, where are my Tallest? And why are you piloting a ship?"

The female Irken narrowed her eyes at Zim. "The Tallest have sent me to retrieve you. My name is Atra."

"Atra," he repeated. "Why would the Tallest send  _you?_ You are clearly a science drone, how do you-"

"I'm not a  _drone!"_ she snapped. "I'll have you know that I'm the head scientist in the science and engineering department, and that the Tallest have entrusted me with-" She abruptly slapped a hand over her mouth to silence herself.

"Entrusted you with what?" Zim asked curiously.

"Entrusted me… with… this mission! Returning you to the Massive for your celebration! Yes!" She grinned sheepishly.

Zim smiled brightly. "Yes, of course! You should be honored, science drone. You have the honor of transporting Zim to the celebration he has so rightly deserved all along!"

Atra figured that there was no sense in trying to get him to see that she was  _not_  a drone. "So, this is the infamous Zim. You really are just like the stories say."

He beamed, puffing up his chest a bit at the praise. "Yes yes, I am sure that there are  _many_  stories about me."

"Believe me, there are," she muttered under her breath in response. "Alright, hold onto something. We're about to exit the atmosphere."

Zim quickly hopped into the other seat and buckled himself. "GIR!"

His robot servant, who was busying himself by exploring the ship, quickly made his way to Zim's side.

"Hurry, grab onto something!"

Nodding, Gir leaped into Zim's lap, wrapping his arms around his torso. "Gir, when I said grab onto something, I didn't mean- AHHHH!"

And with that, they were off, the impact of the Earth's atmosphere effectively silencing Zim.

* * *

"My Tallest, I bring you a status update."

"Ah- Atra!" Purple dropped the puppet he was holding. "Nice to hear from you- er, are you alone?"

Atra nodded. "Yes, Zim is currently… exploring."

"Good. And you're right on schedule too! Complete this mission for us, Atra, and we can ensure that your reward will be… uh, awesome," said Red, halfheartedly examining the puppet on his wrist.

"Yeah, it's gonna be pretty awesome," Purple added, taking a large bite out of what looked like a burrito.

"Um… thanks, I guess. A-Anyway, we are expected to reach the Massive within 24 hours."

Red was practically beaming. "Great! Contact us again right before you reach the Massive, 'kay?" And with that, the monitor went black and the transmission feed died.

Atra cursed under her breath. She swore that this mission felt like it was taking too long. "Computer, contact the main laboratory."

After a moment of nothing but static, a short, pale Irken appeared on the screen, saluting respectfully. "Miss Atra. What can I do for you?"

"I need you to check on the status of the chip. Is it ready?"

"Yes. W-We've yet to test it, but-"

"You've yet to test it?! It has to work! Make sure you test it, immediately! If there are any problems, fix them! My career is on the line! If it doesn't work then I lose everything!"

"Y-Yes, Miss Atra!"

"I will be there in about 24 hours to make final evaluations. Have it ready."

She abruptly cut the transmission. Whatever. They were all fools anyway.

_"So far, everything is going smoothly. If I can keep this up just a little bit longer… then-"_

"Science drone."

Atra groaned internally. "What?"

"Tell me, have the Tallest revealed to you what they have planned for my celebration? Since this party is in my honor, I imagine that all of my favorite snacks will be prepared?"

Come to think of it, now she wasn't really sure if she could survive 24 more hours on the same ship as Zim. "Sure, Zim. Sure."

* * *

"Damn it!" he shouted. "That stupid, moronic alien! The idiotic son of a bitch! Couldn't he have just listened to me for once?! Now… now he's gonna die and I  _can't…"_

Wait. What was he saying? Of course he can.

"Yet again, Zim, I'm gonna go save your stupid life. You'd better be prepared to owe me  _big time."_

With that, he slowly got to his feet, wiping away the tears that had gathered in his eyes, before rushing over to the elevator. "Take me to the main level."

He was  _still_  working out the kinks with Tak's ship, but it would have to do. He didn't exactly have any other options. After he got back home, he hit the button and the garage door slid open, revealing the spaceship he'd come to see as his own (even though it really wasn't). He  _really_  hoped that Tak didn't come back one day looking for her ship.

He hopped into the pilot's seat. It was a little cramped, and it seemed much smaller than it did when he was a kid, but it would work. Zim couldn't have gotten too far away.

_"Interface Activated. Intruder alert- oh. It's just **you.** "_

"Yeah, I know, you're thrilled to see me. Happy to see you too. Did you miss me?"

_"Piss off."_

"Right. Well, get ready, because we're going on a little trip."

_"Oh, are we now?"_

"Yes. We are. Zim… did something dumb, again. And I have to go save him. Again."

_"Let me get this straight. You want me to help save Zim, of all people? Why? I thought you hated him."_

"Yes. Well… no. Um… it's complicated right now."

_"Well, I hate him, so the answer's no."_

"Come on, please? I know that you don't understand emotions or whatever, but I... I need him back. I need  _him_."

_"What's in it for me?"_

"I… I won't bother you for a whole year!"

_"…On the off chance that you'll actually follow through on that, I'm in."_

"Awesome! Alright, start up the engines! I've got an alien to catch!"

The engines roared to life. Dib briefly lamented not saying goodbye to Gaz or his father, but quickly rid himself of such regret. It's not like they'd miss him or worry for him. Although, Gaz might be rather upset that she wasn't going to get free rides to work or to her boyfriend's house while he was gone. As for his father, well, he hardly ever noticed when he was gone half the time anyway.

He did fear, however, that he might end up being gone for longer than he intended. He had no idea how time worked in space, so he might end up leaving for a year, or ten, maybe even fifty. He just hoped that it wouldn't take  _that_  long to rescue Zim. This would hopefully be a quick, get in-get out mission.

There was also the, albeit small, possibility that Zim was telling the truth. But Dib figured he should be there anyway, just in case things went south.

There was a tiny part of him that was saying that perhaps he really should just respect Zim's decision. He  _wasn't_  human. When had he forgotten that? When had he started seeing Zim as a person? Zim was  _Irken._ Irkens had an entirely different culture, a different set of values. They were  _nothing_ like humans. Yet even so, Dib found that Zim was looking less and less like an alien as the days went on. There were the Irkens, and then there was Zim. Zim didn't  _feel Irken_ to Dib anymore. He felt…

_Human._

Of course, physically he was not, but mentally…  _emotionally…_

Irkens had emotions. He'd seen them before.

Although he didn't show it often, Zim was extremely protective of Gir, for example. Dib could recall one time having threatened Gir during one of their arguments.

_"If you don't give in now, Zim, I'll send your robot sidekick to the junkyard!_

_Zim's antennae stood at attention, his crimson eyes narrowing into dangerous slits as he glared heatedly at the human. "Don't you **dare.** If you lay one hand on Gir, I'll see to it that the Armada turns this planet into a pile of ash while you  **watch."**_

_And_ , during their many battles, Zim had the opportunity to kill Dib several times. But there was this look in his eye, a look that Dib had only started to see once he hit his teenage years. He always released him, or Dib would "conveniently" escape. It was like Zim was giving him an out; a chance to run away so they could wake up the next day and do it all over again.

There had always been this unspoken agreement between them. Despite their threats, both of them knew to never go all the way. There were a couple times when both Dib and Zim had gone too far, and when they did, they learned more about the boundaries that they weren't allowed to cross with one another.

There was, of course, the time that Zim shot him in the shoulder with a plasma gun. That had been the first time. Dib was around fourteen when it happened, and he was in so much pain that he was sure he was going to die. And he might have, had it not been for Zim.

_Dib slowly looked over at his shoulder. The plasma ray had burned through his trench coat and his shirt and left a large, deep wound. Blood gushed forth, trailing over the pale, unmarred skin of his hand, staining his shirt and coat._

_The pain finally registered and Dib fell to his knees, clutching at the open wound. "Shit…"_

_He weakly looked up to see Zim drop the gun. "Dib?" he asked, his tone uncharacteristically soft. "Oh come now, surely you haven't been incapacitated that easily?"_

_If he weren't in so much pain, he might be angry. He might have reached for that dropped gun. But the agony was far too much for him to ignore. He felt the warmth of his blood trickling over his hands and down his wrists, the sting and burn of the ache that resonated through his shoulder and down his arm._

_"Dib…" Zim said again, quieter this time. "Your fluids are spilling everywhere and it's rather disgusting. Please stop."_

_"I can't just stop Zim, you fucking shot me. I'm bleeding, you ass," he snapped._

_Zim stepped closer, and although he could see in the dark, with Dib's hand atop his injury, he couldn't get a proper look at how deep it was. "You do not need to worry; plasma guns aren't enough to kill anyone. Unless I shot you in the head. Then you might've died."_

_"This isn't fucking funny Zim, take me to a goddamn hospital before I bleed out!"_

_Zim's eyes widened as the severity of the situation began to sink in. Dib was serious. He was really, **really**  hurt. If he didn't get treated soon…_

_"Damn it," he muttered under his breath, "come with me. My base isn't far from here."_

_"Like hell I'm coming with you! Take me to a real hospital, you moron!"_

_"A human hospital will not know how to treat a wound from a plasma gun. I have a medical bay in my base. I have the equipment to treat you."_

_"How do I know you won't just take advantage of me while I'm weak?!"_

_"…The idea is tempting… but Zim would prefer to fight the Dib in pique physical condition."_

_"But you shot me. If you had finished the job, you would've won fair and square."_

_"…Stop talking now, Dib-filth. Before we take you to my base, we need to do something to slow down your excessive bleeding." Zim tore off a piece of fabric from the bottom of his uniform. "The fabric of Irken uniforms is much stronger than most human fabrics. It's much like your "Kevlar", but better. It's only temporary, but it will work for now."_

_After Zim finished wrapping the wound, he grabbed Dib's arm and wrapped it around his neck. "Are you ready?"_

_"Z-Zim, I don't see how you're gonna- whoa!"_

_In a mere second, Dib was lifted off the ground as Zim's PAK legs shot out, successfully lifting them both into the air. Dib held onto Zim for dear life, clutching him tightly._

_"You are way too heavy, Dib-thing. I can't carry you this way."_

_"Oh, well excuse me- hey!"_

_Zim had changed their position to that of a bridal carry. It looked a little ridiculous, considering how much smaller Zim was. But Dib was on the verge of passing out at the moment, so he really didn't care enough to be embarrassed._

_"Feel honored, Dib-filth. I am agreeing to carry you to my base and treat you despite the fact that your body is covered in your disgusting fluids. You are going to owe me for this."_

_"Y-Yeah… sure thing, space-boy…"_

_And that was all Dib could say before he passed out._

He never did find out why Zim agreed to help him, although now he had a feeling he knew why.

Of course, there had also been times when he too had pushed things too far. There had been that time in the eighth grade when Dib bent one of his antenna during a fight and Zim couldn't hear or walk right for a week. Then there was that time last year when he had jokingly challenged Zim to a water gun fight, figuring that the alien had already taken his daily paste bath, only to find that he had severely burned the Irken by accident. And then there was that one time sophomore year when they were once again fighting and Dib had punched him so hard that he'd damaged his 'squeedly-spooch', whatever the fuck  _that_  was.

_"We are about to make contact with Earth's atmosphere. Brace yourself."_

Dib prepared himself for the incoming impact, buckling the seatbelts and clutching tightly onto the seat to hold himself down.

_Wait for me, Zim. I'm coming for you._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> kudos to anyone who caught the subtle reference in the beginning of the chapter!


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hoo boy... this chapter is a bit... intense. sorry in advance.
> 
> enjoy...?

The Massive was just like he remembered. Not much had changed at all, save for a few cosmetic upgrades here and there. Zim stepped out of the battle cruiser, taking in the familiar surroundings of the docking station. He stretched languidly, releasing the built up tension of his muscles from being stuck in such a small ship. "It's been years since I've seen this place. It looks a little different."

"Of course. We've made a few changes here and there," Atra replied idly as she stepped out behind him.

_"You?"_  Zim asked incredulously. "You do direct work on the Massive?"

She grinned. "But of course. I am the head of the science and engineering department now."

Zim seemed to consider this,  _almost_  as if he were impressed. "I see… perhaps you are not a drone as I had first thought…"

"Wow, thanks for the compliment," she muttered sarcastically, though her tone held no real malice.

Zim narrowed his eyes at her. "You should feel honored," he said haughtily. "Zim does not give out compliments often."

_Obviously,_  she thought. Deciding not to prod further, Atra turned her attention to the giggling SIR unit standing beside him. "No offense, but you may want to leave your SIR unit here."

Zim shook his head, stone-faced, as if the very idea was out of the question. "No, Gir stays with me. He's too unstable to be left alone for too long."

"Yes, but are you sure you want…  _that_ with you when you present yourself to the Tallest? It's a bit disrespectful, no?"

Zim shot an icy glare at her. "Shut your mouth-hole! Gir is coming with me, end of discussion. Besides, the Tallest have met Gir before. They know he's… kind of not good."

She merely shrugged. "Suit yourself." After gaining clearance from the guards working the docking station, Atra led Zim and Gir to the council room. "This room is for those seeking council with the Tallest," she explained. "It's brand new, we just put it in a few years ago. They should be right in here."

Zim looked up at her, eyes narrowed suspiciously. "Eh? What about my celebration?"

"Just  _go."_

Zim looked over at Gir, uncertainty present in his eyes. Gir only smiled cheerily, as if urging him on. "Very well. Gir, with me. You… wait out here for Zim."

Atra glared daggers at the male as he proceeded into the room.  _Yeah, I'll do that._

Once she was sure he was out of hearing range, she slammed the door shut and turned on the communicator on her wrist. "Main Laboratory? Yes, it's Atra, I've returned with Irken Zim. Is the chip ready?"

_"_ _Yes, Miss Atra. It's been tested and is now ready for your final evaluations."_

"Excellent! I'll be in momentarily."

She smiled to herself as she quickly made her way to the lab. Now that Zim was finally on the Massive, she could put the plan into action.

_Just a little bit longer._

* * *

_"_ _Dib-human, what is it that you're hoping to accomplish by doing this?"_

_Dib awoke with a startle. Where were they?_ _"This place is..."_

_"One of your filthy Earth parks," Zim replied with a snort. Funny. Did he even have a nose?_

_But he was right. They were standing in what appeared to be a field of some sort. There were park benches and a playground nearby, but oddly enough, it was just the two of them. Strange. The weather was gorgeous, sunny and, if he had to guess, around 72 degrees._

_"You didn't answer my question," Zim pointed out, rather impatiently at that. "What are you hoping to gain?"  
_

_"Gain? Nothing._ _I just... I want… I want to find you, you idiot. Want to bring you back to Earth. Bring you home."_

_Zim waved a dismissive hand, as if the very idea were ludicrous. "Earth is **not**  my home. Besides, you know better than anyone. Actually, you're the  **only**  one that knows."_

_"..._ _Knows what?" he asked._

_"_ _You know that there is no saving me."_

_"_ _Shut up," Dib snapped. "I'm gonna save you, alright? I'll be damned if I let your stupid leaders kill you. Seriously, that's a stupid way to die."_

_Zim turned his back to him, idly placing his hands behind his back. "_ _You'll be too late, you know. Surely by now I've already arrived on the Massive."_

_"_ _Stop talking."_

_"_ _There was never any hope for me, Dib. Never. There is never any hope for my kind."_

_A realization came to him then, one that he should've seen coming a mile away. "…You're not Zim."_

_The alien turned around again to face him, tilting his head in confusion. So much like Zim, yet not him at all. The same bloody eyes, the same jade skin and mocking grin. "I'm not?"_

_"_ _No. The Zim I know doesn't talk like that. The Zim I know… would lick the dust and survive. The Zim I know… never gives up, ever! So quit it with that!"_

_"…_ _You simply don't understand, Dib-beast." He shook his head, a soft, uncharacteristic, almost defeated smile spreading across his lips. "Even if you could save me… a defect has no possible future. We aren't destined to live long lives. We are destined for failure. We're destined for death."_

_"_ _Quit whining, we're all destined for death," he fired back. "Look, you know what, maybe this is pointless. Maybe I'm being stupid, trying to save someone that's been doomed from the start. But I will be damned if I let you die up there. You hear me? Whether we're friends or enemies, I can't stand the idea of a life that doesn't have you in it. When we were enemies, I got a rush out of the excitement, the danger. Even though it was serious stuff, there was something about fighting you that was almost… fun. But I came to realize later that hurting you wasn't what made me happy. It was… being with you, having someone that took me seriously. Do you… remember when I quit chasing you to do 'real science'?"_

_The pseudo-Zim nodded shakily. "Yes, Zim remembers. It was... one of the worst times of Zim's life."_

_"_ _Mine too. It wasn't just the excitement I missed, it was you. I missed you, and your stupid face and your stupid laugh. And when we finally became enemies again, and I saw you laughing… you looked so happy. I was happy too."_

_His eyes widened, a soft purple-ish flush spreading across his face. "_ _Zim… Zim was not-"_

_"_ _You were too! And it was after that day when things first started to change… when the game… really began."_

_Dib had thought that the game was just a title that his brain had come up with to refer to he and Zim's relationship, but could it be that Zim understood?_

_"_ _The game… our sad little game... has it really become like that?"_

_He grinned, shrugging. "Afraid so. You know... I used to think I was some kind of hero. You were the bad guy and I had to stop you, but... it's not really like that anymore. Maybe I just cared about my reward after all. Play the game and I get my prize, right?"_

_"The Dib is not selfish. Incredibly annoying? Yes. But not selfish. Even Zim can see the honor in wanting to defend one's own planet. I would do the same for Irk."_

_"You would?"_

_Zim blinked, as if realizing an error. "Er- perhaps not now, but not too long ago I would have. But_ _Zim... never thought of it as a game, at least, not until recently," he admitted. "Did you… not take Zim seriously?"_

_"_ _Of course I did. For years I took you seriously. I still do. But... your threats to invade Earth kinda lost their vigor, you know."_

_"_ _Mm…" Zim mumbled, his eyes downcast._

_Dib almost felt bad for the Irken, looking so small and defeated. Zim may be small physically, but his larger-than-life personality more than made up for his size._ _He was fully aware, at this point, that this was not Zim, that this was just his subconscious trying to keep him grounded. But he would go with it. He would go with it long enough to find him, anyway. "…_ _Hey, um... I'm sorry if I made you feel like a joke. If I ever get to see you again, I'll tell you that."_

_"…_ _Zim is used to being the joke."_

_Dib opened his mouth to chastise him for throwing himself a pity party, but realized that he really didn't have any room to talk. Not to mention that this was probably how Zim genuinely felt, even if the real one would never admit it._

_He sighed rather melodramatically, turning to look towards the cloudless sky. "Great, now I'm dreaming of you too… when are you gonna leave me alone, you stupid alien?"_

_The dream-Zim smirked. "Never."_

_"…_ _I hate you."_

_"_ _And Zim feels the same, you revolting human pig."_

_Dib laughed, and it wasn't a sarcastic or dry chuckle as usual. He was laughing, genuinely laughing, for the first time in a while. "Finally, the first Zim-like thing I've heard from you."_

_"What are you talking about?_ _Zim… will always be Zim."_

_"_ _Good. I wouldn't have it any other way, space boy."_

* * *

Dib awakened rather peacefully, as opposed to his usual nightmares involving Zim. Although… he couldn't exactly call that a nightmare, could he?

_God, when had he fallen asleep?_

Groaning, he sat up, careful not to bump his head against the low ceiling of Tak's ship. "Hey, how far away are we?"

_"_ _You woke up just in time. We're approximately thirty minutes away from the Massive."_

"Good, so we're right on time then."

_"_ _I certainly hope that you have a_ plan _for when we reach the Massive."_

Dib's cheeks heated slightly. He hadn't really thought of that before he went off into outer space to save his former enemy. Which is strange. Usually he was a planner, especially when it came to Zim. "Oh, uh… of course I do!"

_"_ _You don't, do you?"_

"It's… a work in progress."

He could hear the ship actually make a noise akin to a sigh.  _"_ _As soon as the Massive detects us, we'll be blown to smithereens. Meaning that we need to be careful."_

"But this is an Irken ship. It should blend in alongside the other Voot Cruisers, right?"

_"_ _Theoretically, but we'll need to be fast. If they pick up a signal from me, then they'll recognize it as a blocked ship and therefore see me as a threat."_

"Roger that. When we reach the Massive, we'll dock alongside the other Voot Cruisers. Be quick, okay?"

_"_ _Don't tell me what to do."_

"Okay, sorry. Jeez…"

* * *

The room was everything he'd expect from a council room. It featured the finest of Irken luxuries, luxuries that only the Tallest and certain elites got to enjoy. They were the kind of luxuries that Zim could only dream of at his size, though he found himself hoping that his celebration would be held here, in this very room.

Just like Atra had said, the Tallest were waiting for him inside, snickering among themselves.

"Hello my Tallest!" Zim bowed as a show of respect, Gir doing the same after a hard nudge from him. "Invader Zim, reporting in!"

Red jumped and dropped a bag of what appeared to be popcorn, clearly startled. "Zim! What are you- oh. Yeah. That's right. We called you here."

Zim nodded proudly. "Yes, and I must say, your science drone was rather unexpected. I was hoping you would come in person."

"Yes, well, Atra is… one of the finest soldiers we have. Yeah. Sure," Purple said dismissively. "Anyhow, we're glad you made it, Zim."

"Yes, we're… overjoyed," Red mumbled through clenched teeth.

"I see! I must admit, you had me worried at first my Tallest, but Zim has always had faith in you! I am honored that you have once again placed your trust in me. I swear I won't let you down!"

"That's great Zim, now-"

"Oh, I was thinking, before the celebration begins, I could share my final plan for the destruction of all human life on Earth! You see, there's this one human, Dib- you've met him- he's the  _worst_. And I sort of promised him that I would bring the Armada with me to lay waste to planet Earth, so… any chance we could make that happen, so I can shove it in Dib's face?"

Red waved a dismissive hand, like a parent dismissing a hyperactive child. "Sure Zim, sure. Whatever you want."

The smaller Irken's eyes lit up as a wide grin spread across his face. "Yes! Thank you my Tallest!"

The two Irken leaders exchanged glances before rising to their feet. "It's time for your celebration, Zim," Purple said, an icy, almost  _intimidating_  tone to his voice. It sounded a bit off to Zim, but he ultimately paid no mind to it. They were his leaders, after all.

Giddily, Zim grabbed Gir's wrist and dragged him along as he followed closely behind his leaders. The Massive hadn't changed much since Zim had last been on it, but there were a few things that looked different. It seemed that there had been more rooms and features added, which only meant that it was growing. Which was a good sign. However, there was something… off. His Tallest were not acting like themselves. Zim has known them for many years, ever since they were mere smeets in the academy together. He liked to think that he knew everything about them, at least more than most Irkens did.

"My Tallest," Zim started, a bit awkwardly at first. "Zim may have no place to say this, but if something is wrong, you may tell me. We  _do_  have a long history together."

Neither of his leaders responded, which only made Zim more nervous. That was strange enough in and of itself, Irkens didn't  _get nervous._ And rather than walk into a large, open room full of cheering Irkens, he was instead lead into a compact, dark room that appeared to be...  _empty_.

"Uh, my Tallest? Where are we?"

_"_ _Irken Zim,"_  a deep, baritone voice boomed throughout the room, so loud that it nearly hurt Zim's antennae.  _"Welcome back."_

Zim recognized it almost immediately. "That voice… the Control Brains? My Tallest, why are we-"

_"_ _This, Irken Zim, is your execution."_

"E-Execution?!" His squeedlyspooch started to pound as panic overtook him, his body tensing before suddenly, a new thought came to him. He relaxed almost instantly, a cheeky grin spreading across his face. "O-Oh, I see what's going on here! This is a joke, right? You always were very funny, my Tallest. And you even got the Control Brains in on it too!"

_"This is not a joke, Irken Zim. The Tallest have been ordered to bring you here for your execution."_

"Ordered? But no one orders the Tallest!" Zim turned towards his leaders, his tone panicked. "My Tallest, what's going on?! Tell them! Tell them that they can't do this to a-"

_**"We can, and we will. Your 'Tallest' leaders are no more than the image of a perfect Irken, an image that we chose ourselves."** _

"Hey! We hold  _some_  power!" Purple protested weakly.

"An image... you mean..."

"Look, there  _is_  no celebration, Zim," Red stated flatly. "It was a trick, to lure you here. And you fell for it. Again."

"But… but… you said…"

Purple chortled to himself. "You really are gullible, aren't you Zim?"

Red's usual easygoing demeanor had completely diminished, replaced with something far more serious, almost sinister. "I will admit, not having you around is gonna be strange at first. But for the sake of the Empire… for the sake of the universe… this must be done."

Suddenly, in that moment, everything seemed to fall into place like puzzle pieces. These puzzle pieces weren't made to fit together but they just  _did_ , and Zim couldn't understand why they would at all. But the constant laughter, the blatant insults, the tricks, it had been this way all along. He was just too blinded by loyalty to see it. The Tallest had always wanted him dead. His banishment to Foodcourtia, his exile to planet Earth, and again when they told him the truth… they really had every intention of never seeing him again.

And Zim, the ever loyal Irken invader, never thought twice about it. All those wasted years, perfecting plans and calling the Tallest… and for what? Even if he had been successful… it never would've mattered anyway.

As if a switch was flipped, his fight-or-flight instincts kicked in. Suddenly, everything became so simple. If he didn't get out, he was going to die. "GIR! Defensive mode, protect your master! We're getting out of this place, now!"

Gir's eyes flashed red, prepared to obey, but before he could so much as move to defend Zim, a large metal arm with two sharp prongs at the end shot out of an open socket in the floor. The prongs drove into his back, bright orange and blue sparks flying through the air. Before he could even make a sound, his eyes went black as he limply fell to the floor. The sound of metal clanging against metal echoed ominously throughout the room. The sound rang repeatedly in Zim's head, on and on like a broken record.

Zim's eyes went impossibly wide as he watched his beloved SIR unit fall to the floor, laying uncharacteristically still. Time seemed to stand still. The world around him started rotating in a slow spin. The Tallest's strident laughter became less clear as he became hyper-focused on his companion, lying still on the floor like a discarded piece of garbage. Sure, Gir had been broken before, but Zim had never been worried, as it was always something he could fix. But this... how could he fix this?

He couldn't help it, couldn't control it. The robot's name came forth from his throat in the form of a horrified scream, raw and unadulterated as Zim fell to his knees. He gripped his antennae tightly, violently pulling on them in hopes that it would wake him from this nightmare that he seemed to have fallen into.

"You… killed him," he choked out, his voice raw. "You killed Gir… you killed my-"

The first Control Brain's impassive voice interrupted him before he could get the words out.  ** _"You will not escape this, Irken Zim. You may have managed to evade your trial, but this time, you will be eliminated."_**

"I don't understand!" Zim retorted. "Why am I being executed? What have I done wrong?!"

_"_ _What have you done wrong?!"_  both Red and Purple exclaimed simultaneously.

**_"_ ** **_As per Irken law, we shall inform you of your crimes and your punishment."_ **

Zim quickly glanced over at his SIR unit. There were two perfectly-shaped circular holes on his back from where the daggers had drilled into him. His eyes were black and lifeless; almost like they were the day he had first received Gir. Damn it…  _how could he have let this happen?_

_"_ _Irken Zim is responsible for the following: the deaths of two almighty Tallests, Tallest Miyuki and Tallest Spork."_

**_"_ ** **_The deaths of several Irken invaders during Operation Impending Doom One."_ **

_"_ _Destruction of Irken property."_

**_"_ ** **_Ignoring banishment protocols."_ **

_"_ _Taking control of the Massive and injuring several elite Irken soldiers and the current almighty Tallest."_

**_"_ ** **_Multiple blackouts."_ **

_"_ _And for singlehandedly ruining Operation Impending Doom One with your careless and destructive tendencies."_

**_"_ ** **_For those crimes, your punishment is death."_ **

_"_ _However, seeing as how your PAK cannot be terminated via data deletion, an alternative method shall be used."_

"B-But Zim thought… that you pardoned all of this…" Zim weakly insisted, his squeedlyspooch pounding a mile a minute. His Tallest appeared… different, as he had come to notice. Intimidating, even. They were looming over Zim, wearing flat, emotionless expressions.

"We did," replied Red. "But the Control Brains have decided that you're a threat to the universe. And quite frankly… I think they might be right."

"B-But I… this is… this is-"

Purple glowered down at him, a deep-set frown pulling at his lips. "What?  _Wrong?_ That's hilarious coming from the defective responsible for the deaths of several of his own kind. You slaughtered your own people out of a desire to prove yourself… so really… who's the one in the wrong here? If you want to save some of your dignity, you should accept your fate and die like a proper Irken, no?"

Zim's bottom lip quivered slightly. He was shaking, his face burning with the shame of being seen on his knees like a weakling by his leaders. "But Zim  _can't_  die… I still-"

"Still what? What were you doing on Earth that was so important? Playing with your trash unit? Making friends with the natives? You seem awfully close to that big-headed kid…"

Their faces immediately came to his mind, and he found that, upon looking at Dib, he wasn't filled with burning rage or annoyance like usual. "Gir… and the Dib…"

"Aww, look! He even knows his name!" Red jeered, snickering to himself.

Upon hearing their taunts and chuckles, Zim felt some of the strength he'd been losing returning, an inexplicable rage bubbling up inside him. His hands clenched into fists at his sides, his claws digging into the meat of his hand through the protective gloves. "Gir… may be a trash unit as you say… but he is  _my_  trash unit. And the Dib… the Dib is…"

What was Dib? He thought of Dib and what the name meant to him, what it made him think of. He used to associate that name with blind hatred, rage, absolute dislike. Perhaps a part of him still did. But now? Now, it reminded him of that stupid TV show that he was obsessed with, 'Mysterious Mysteries' or whatever. It reminded him of computers and spaceships and that 'bigfoot' creature he always went on about. He thought of 'haunted houses', he thought of Dib's old, beat up silver car that he drove to school every day during their last year. He thought of those rare nights they'd spend together when they weren't trying to kill each other.

He remembered the night Dib introduced him to frozen yogurt (which he could stomach in small amounts) and those french fries from the diner down the street from where Dib lived. He remembered the night he showed Dib a planet that was only visible on Earth once every 50 years. He remembered seeing the look of wonder on his face. Those amber eyes that seemed to sparkle with excitement, the bright grin that reminded Zim of a younger Dib. He was practically glowing and Zim could remember being in absolute awe of him. That was the first time that a human had ever captivated him in such a way.

Dib's name was now synonymous with everything. It was like he couldn't look at anything anymore without thinking of him.

"I… don't know what the Dib-thing is anymore. But he  _was_  my enemy for many years. And despite our fights, he at least… looked at me with respect… which is more than I can say for either of you..!"

The two leaders looked up at each other blankly before once again erupting into raucous laughter.

"Respect?" Red inquired after wiping a tear from his eye. "A  _defect_  like you? A defect that is responsible for the deaths of not only several Irken elites, but two Tallests?"

Purple smirked languidly. "We've given you a free pass for a long time Zim, but that time's up now."

**_"_ ** **_Irken Zim, your time has come."_ **

"No!" Zim made a move to dart for the door, but four metal arms shot out from the floor and constricted around Zim's wrists and ankles, successfully binding him. A fifth metal arm snaked up behind him and jabbed a needle into the back of his neck.

_"_ _You cannot use your PAK to escape. This serum temporarily blocks all incoming brain signals to the PAK."_

A heavy fog settled over his mind. If Zim weren't being held up by the metal arms, he would've collapsed onto his hands and knees yet again. He was struggling to keep his eyes open as the serum worked itself into his system. His entire body felt like it was on fire and he wanted nothing more than to drift off into a tempting slumber. But he forced himself to keep his eyes open. If he was going to die… then he was going to do it properly, right? If he could do nothing else right, then at least he should die like a proper Irken.

_"_ _Now then. Bring forth the chip."_


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is super different from the original draft but i felt like zim and dib got off the hook too easily so... here you go

Dib wished that he had thought to construct some sort of holographic disguise before he left in order to sneak past security unnoticed, but he was kind of in a hurry. Oh well. Go big or go home, right?

When he jumped out of the ship, he realized that he was going to be noticed relatively quickly. He was much taller than most of the other Irkens, not to mention that he had hair and was terribly pale and oh yeah-  _not green._ He could already feel alien eyes on him as he proceeded to the line where the security guards were clearing the other Irkens for entry onto the Massive. The line moved relatively quickly before he eventually reached the two Irken guards standing at the entryway, decked out in armor and- yeah,  _definitely_ carrying guns.

The first guard, a surprisingly tall female (Dib was only really guessing, he wasn't quite sure how gender and sex worked on Irk), pointed a gloved finger up at him. She was saying something, rather angrily, but Dib couldn't understand a word of what she said.

_She must be speaking Irken. Of course, why would they need to speak anything else on their own ship?_

"Uh, sorry, I don't speak Irken. Can you, um..?" Dib assumed that Zim could speak English because of his PAK. Surely they could as well?

The two guards looked at each other, falling silent for a few seconds as if processing it before standing at attention once more. "Alien! How did you get here?! What species are you?!"

Dib threw his hands up defensively. "Take it easy, I'm human! I'm from the planet Earth. Um, you see, I've got a friend here and I was hoping I could see him, and maybe speak to the almighty Tallest?"

The second guard snickered dryly. "Oh  _haha_ , like we haven't heard that one before. Are you a spy? Who are you working for?!"

"Hey," Dib murmured quietly, trying to calm them down to avoid making a scene. "Take it easy, let's talk this out-"

"Intruder!" The two guards were reaching for their weapons, and that was when Dib realized that plan A was going horribly wrong and he really didn't have a plan B. Now, granted, Dib was no fool, of course he had brought a weapon. But the second he even thought to reach for that gun, he knew he'd be dead before he even got the chance to pull the trigger. He was fast, but Irkens were faster. Right now, he had no choice but to reluctantly cooperate.

The two guards grabbed him on either side. Dib could feel the tip of an alien gun being pressed into his lower back as they began to make their way out of the docking station. "Try anything and I'll blow your brains out, human. If you even have any, that is," the second guard snapped.

"We're taking you to the Tallest. They'll decide your punishment. Be honored, you'll be graced with the presence of our Tallest in your final moments."

"Huh? Don't you think they'll keep him for experiments before he's executed?" The female guard grinned almost seductively. "He'd make a nice little lab rat for a few days, no?"

Dib opened his mouth to tell them that the Tallest knew him, but ultimately decided against it. If he could somehow use that information as leverage, then he'd need to keep these two in the dark for now.

The second guard scoffed. "Maybe. Who knows? He's awful soft though. Humans must be pathetically weak."

"Hey, I've been doing  _some_  workouts lately!"

A total lie, but hey, he had to save  _some_  of his dignity.

"You know, you Irkens don't have any room to talk. Without your fancy technology, you guys would be  _nothing._ I mean, I'm taller than the both of you combined!"

It probably wasn't smart to instigate Irken soldiers with guns pressed to his back, but hey, Dib never claimed to be the brightest crayon in the box. He always was the kind of person to say what he thought, even at the expense of his own safety.

"You've got guts. I like it. I can't wait to have them strewn all over an autopsy table," the first guard nearly purred, jamming the gun even further into the skin of his back.

Dib chuckled. Oh, the irony. "Funny, I used to say the same thing to one of  _your people._ "

"Oh, your supposed 'friend'?"

Dib guessed that one of them had decided to humor him. "Yeah. His name's Zim. Do you know him by any chance?"

"Know him?!" The two guards asked with a gasp. "Zim is... an abomination... a disgrace to Irkens everywhere... no wonder you're friends with him..."

"Friends is a pretty strong word... uh, and so is 'abomination'. Mind filling me in?"

The two guards exchanged firm glances before the first one spoke. "Not that it's any of  _your_  business, human, but... we've heard whispers among the Massive that the Control Brains declared Zim a threat to the universe."

"Anything that threatens the universe threatens us, so naturally... he needs to be destroyed."

Dib couldn't help but laugh at that. "Zim, a threat to the universe? Nah, not possible. He's been on Earth for seven years and he's yet to conquer a parking lot, let alone the world."

"That's what we thought. Zim could never do anything right! Every time he was given an order, it's like he'd go and do the opposite! That shouldn't be possible, yet... for whatever reason... he could defy orders."

_"He's a defective. That's the only explanation for why he's able to disobey. If it were to fit his agenda, Zim would gladly go against the rules."_ Of course, Dib didn't say this. These two idiots didn't need to be spreading that kind of information.

"That's Zim for ya. He never listens, does he?"

"You sound like you're talking from experience."

"I am. You're talking to Earth's sole defender."

The two guards raked their eyes over him, their expressions contorting to faces of disgust. "How sad. The Earth would be doomed if it were actually marked for conquest by the Empire, you know."

"I thought it was for seven years, and I kept it safe. Pretty damn impressive."

The first guard laughed tauntingly. "It would be, if Zim were actually an invader. You're not a defender, human. You're merely a child playing these silly games with a worthless, shell of an Irken."

Dib laughed sheepishly. "Come on, only  _I_  can insult Zim like that. He's one of your kind, couldn't you stand to be a little nicer to him?"

"Nice? After what he did? Please. Killing two almighty Tallests hardly calls for any nice treatment."

"Kill? What do you-"

"We're here."

Dib was abruptly met with a large set of dark violet doors. He felt his heart starting to pound, the words of those security guards ringing clear as a bell in his mind. He'd never imagined that Zim had such a dark past. Sure, he'd done some pretty fucked up shit while on Earth, but Dib had never anticipated that he'd end up being a total menace on his home planet as well. But it only further proved what he'd thought all along: Zim really was hated by his own people.

He couldn't help but pity Zim. He was no stranger to being ostracized. He knew what it was like to have everyone around you turn their backs on you. He wondered if Zim knew?

Well, if he didn't know then, he certainly does now.

It was now a race against the clock. He could reach the room and find Zim already dead. Was he prepared for that? Could he accept that he was too late? If Zim was already dead, then Dib would be captured and most likely experimented on before being killed after they lost interest, which wouldn't be long. The Tallest didn't have very long attention spans, as he'd come to find out.

He's already come this far. He would  _not_  give up now.

_You son of a bitch, you'd better be alive when I get there._

_…Please, please be alive!_

* * *

Nothing could have prepared her for the sight she witnessed when she was brought into the room. As she carried the small metal box containing the chip in the palm of her hand, she caught sight of where Zim was being held.

He was practically encased in metal tubing. The arms were holding him tightly in place, preventing him from moving. There were metal limbs around his torso, neck, arms, and legs. He must have been given the serum, as he was not using his PAK to attempt an escape. His face was flushed, a bright violet hue spread across his cheeks. His eyes were half-lidded, his antennae lazily hanging on either side of his head.

She almost,  _almost_ felt bad for the other Irken.

Shakily, she proceeded to the platform where Zim was being held. She wiggled her antennae to both the Tallest and the Control Brains to show respect.

**_"State your name and your field."_ **

She cleared her throat, placing her hands behind her back. "I am Atra, and I am in the science and engineering field."

Another metal arm shot out and plugged into her PAK, gathering her personal data. She flinched, but stood her ground.

**_"I see. According to your PAK, you are still encoded as a science drone."_ **

"Y-Yes, but... the Tallest have generously offered me a promotion in order to complete this… special assignment," she explained.

_"…Very well then. You may proceed."_

She smiled, bowing respectfully, before opening the small box to reveal the miniscule chip. "Thank you. As you are aware, the PAK is automatically built in with a near impeccable firewall, so as to  _prevent_  being infected with a virus. However, the science team and I have designed an unstoppable virus. According to our test results, the chip was able to successfully shut down the PAK. Once the chip is inserted into Irken Zim's PAK, the virus will disguise itself to get past the firewall before eventually breaking down Zim's operating systems beyond repair. After 12 hours… Zim will be dead."

"…No…" a small, barely recognizable voice croaked. "Can't die… I still…"

She closed her eyes, trying to ignore the soft, pleading tone in his voice. She was always  _ever loyal_  to her empire, but to hear the cries and pleas of another dying Irken shook her in ways she couldn't even begin to understand. "…I am sorry, Zim, but there is no other choice. I am under orders from both the Control Brains and my Tallest. They have declared that you are a threat to the universe… I must obey their command. You should know that better than anyone."

"I…"

"You must atone, Zim. You committed many crimes. You are responsible for the deaths of many Irkens. Please understand why this is happening."

"Enough stalling, Atra," Red ordered firmly. "We've waited long enough. Insert the chip, we've got an appointment for lunch soon."

She tensed as she slowly removed the chip, slipping the now empty box into her coat pocket. She approached Zim's PAK, locating the small port at the bottom. Gently, she leaned over his shoulder and whispered a quiet, barely audible  _"I'm sorry."_

And then, with all the strength she had, she shoved the chip into the port.

A deafening silence swept over the room as Zim's eyes grew dull and slid closed, his body slumping as the virus was released into his PAK's operating system.

Red and Purple met each other's eyes, wide grins spreading across their faces. "We did it!" they exclaimed simultaneously, breaking the silence. They grabbed each other's hands, giggling almost maniacally. "We got rid of him!"

_"Irken Atra, escort Irken Zim to a holding cell for the remaining 12 hours."_

The metal arms holding Zim retreated back into the floor. He collapsed, falling onto his face. She looked down at his unconscious form and sighed before reaching down to somehow carry him to a holding cell. Zim was small, but she wasn't much taller than him and was physically weaker compared to the invaders. However, before she could pull the other Irken upwards, the sound of the door busting open caused her to release Zim completely.

"My Tallest, please forgive the intrusion! We caught an alien trying to infiltrate the Massive!"

Displeased at being interrupted, the Tallest both looked over at where the alien intruder stood. Red's eyes grew wide with recognition. "Hey, it's the big-headed kid! Go away, we're celebrating right now!"

"My Tallest, you know this alien?" Atra asked, confused at the strange exchange between them.

"Yeah, he's an Earthling," Purple explained. "He's got quite the attachment to Zim, no?"

"I don't have time for this!" the human shouted, writhing and struggling against the guards' hold. "Where. Is. Zim?!"

"He's dead- or rather, dying," Atra explained as she gestured to Zim lying unconscious on the floor. "The chip has already entered his system. Within twelve hours, Zim will be dead."

* * *

"Within twelve hours, Zim will be dead."

It took a moment for the weight of the words to finally hit him, like a freight train crashing into him at full speed. Zim was dying.

His first thought was that he failed, and he was immediately filled with a deep sorrow, regret for not saving the Irken in time.

But then his second thought came to him.

Dying. As in, not yet dead. Dib had approximately eleven hours and fifty-five minutes left to save him. But he had to take control of the situation somehow. In his current state...

"Leave him here," Purple told the two guards. "You can come retrieve him later. Red and I have a few questions for him."

"Yes, my Tallest." The two guards nodded before roughly releasing Dib and hurrying out of the room, standing guard outside the door.

"You actually did it," Red muttered softly, astounded. "You came all the way to the Massive to save Zim."

"I told you," Dib said with a smirk. "I can be a threat."

"Really?" He exchanged an amused glance with Purple. "Prove it."

Without a moment's hesitation, Dib pulled a surprisingly large plasma gun from the inside of his coat, pointing it directly at Red. "This proof enough for you?"

The Tallest gasped, eyes going wide with horror as they grabbed each other's hands. "You- how did you get that?!"

"Zim's base has a lot of cool stuff, don't you think?" He then turned and pointed his plasma gun at the female Irken. "You," he said, his voice low, "tell me what this chip is. What does it do?"

She threw up her hands in surrender, pleading with her eyes for him not to hurt her. "It's like a virus. The chip was designed to eventually shut down all of Zim's operating systems. Zim's vital organs are connected to the PAK. If the PAK doesn't work, then Zim dies."

"Tell me how to fix him," Dib demanded, stepping closer to her.

"I-It's impossible," she replied, her voice cracking and quaking as she struggled to keep her composure. "The chip has already worked its way into the PAK. You'd have to open up the PAK and manually pull it out, but that's a huge risk." Suddenly realizing her mistake, she slapped her mouth shut, eyes going wide in horror.

Dib pushed past her, falling to his knees to gather the Irken into his arms. Zim was still light as ever, but he felt heavier this time. "Come on Zim," he said, holding him close to his chest. "I'm gonna get you out of here, okay?"

**_"You will not-"_ **

"Stay back!" Dib ordered, pointing the plasma gun. "If you even try shooting those freaky metal tubes at me I'll fire right at your so-called 'Tallest'. One blast of this plasma gun and the two of them are toast."

The Control Brains both fell silent. The room seemed to fall oddly silent right along with them, the only sound being that of Dib's heavy breathing, before two metal arms with shot out and constricted around Dib's wrists. Shouting in surprise, he released Zim, the Irken falling to floor lifelessly beside him. Dib cried out when the arm began wrapping itself tighter and tighter around his left wrist until-

_SNAP!_

"FUCK!" The plasma gun fell to the floor with a loud clanging noise that reverberated throughout the room. Dib fell to his knees, tears blurring his vision as his left wrist went limp.

Red and Purple's strident laughter sounded oddly distorted, though Dib imagined that it was because the pain of having his wrist snapped in half was overcoming most of his senses at the moment. "Did you really think saving Zim was going to be possible?" One of them, Dib thought it was Red, asked teasingly.

"Fuck you," Dib spat, struggling to free his right arm. "Fuck you! I'm... not dead yet, you hear me?! I'll save him from you... spineless cowards, and that's a promise!"

"I have to admit, kid, you have courage. Not many people are dumb enough to infiltrate the Massive."

"Unlike you bastards. You think I... couldn't tell? You two are nothing. You're  _weak!_  Your precious Control Brains... were willing to sacrifice you just now! If they really thought you held any value, they wouldn't have... risked attacking me. Face it... you're nothing but figureheads..."

"Weak figureheads or not, the fact of the matter is, you've lost. Hey, science drone, take them both to their holding cells."

"Y-Yes, my Tallest..."

"Oh, and do something with this trash unit too." Red kicked Gir to the side, disgusted. "Throw it out the airlock or something."

"O-Of course..."

The metal arm hesitantly released Dib. After retrieving Gir, Atra managed to get Zim upright, his feet across dragging the ground as she slowly guided Dib to the exit. "After the chip works it's magic, we'll decide what to do with  _you,_ human," Purple called threateningly out the door.

* * *

Atra led them to a small holding cell. Dib was surprised that she actually took the time to lay both Zim and Gir down on the tiny bed that was provided in the cell.

Dib cursed under his breath, nursing his injured wrist. "Hey, do you think I could get something for my wrist? You kind of broke it you know. A sling or something would be great."

Atra turned to look at him, fuschia eyes wide with curiosity. "What's a sling?"

Dib opened his mouth to ask if she was joking, but realized that she was probably entirely serious. Their PAK's healed all of their injuries nearly instantaneously, so they had no need for slings or casts or hell- even pain meds.

"It's uh... never mind."

He watched as she sighed, her curled antennae laying lazily on either side of her head. She was oddly calm about the whole situation. She looked up to meet his eyes, bright pink clashing with amber. "Listen to me very carefully... if you work with me... I can help you save Zim and escape."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...is anyone surprised? really?


	12. Chapter 12

Dib stared at her incredulously, as if she had grown a second head. It was rare that _he_ was ever offered help from an Irken. "You? Help? Me? Uh…"

She held her hands up defensively. "I understand that you can't trust me, but you need to let me explain."

"Explain?! You'd better have a  _damn_  good explanation for this."

"I do!" she reassured him. "And if you play along, I promise, Zim will be just fine."

"Give me one good reason why I shouldn't be trying to kill you right now."

A hint of a smirk played at her lips. "Well, for one, your weapons have been confiscated." She gestured to the plasma gun now hanging on her belt. "But I'm the one who made the chip. Actually- the chip was sort of my idea."

 _"You_ made the chip?! Ugh, seriously... this whole thing doesn't even add up!" Dib shouted in frustration, running his (injury free) hand through his hair. "If Irkens were going to create something that could even endanger themselves, then... God, even the chip itself doesn't even make any sense! I know Irkens are dumb enough to make something that could kill even them, or at least Zim is, but they'd never make something that could fall into an enemy's hands so easily!"

She flinched at the volume of his voice. She ducked her head almost shamefully- odd. He didn't think Irkens were capable of feeling shame. "I'll explain, but… not here. Come on, I'll take you and Zim to my lab."

"Won't we get caught?"

"No, just act as my prisoners. Stay close to me and don't say anything," she instructed.

"What about Zim?" Dib pointed to the unconscious alien across from him. "He's out cold!"

Atra frowned, her eyes narrowing as she placed a hand under her chin. "Oh, that's quite the predicament..."

"'Quite the predicament'? What the hell is wrong with you?! He's gonna _die_ -"

She interrupted him with a series of small giggles, placing a gloved hand over her mouth to stifle them. "Z-Zim's gonna be fine."

Dib's jaw went slack, his mouth falling open as he practically gaped at the Irken. "Saywhatnow?"

"He's going to be fine," she repeated simply, clearing her throat to keep from laughing again.

"B-But, the chip, the Control Brains said-"

"You mean this chip?"

Atra pulled a small silver metal capsule from her pocket. With the pop of a button, the capsule opened, revealing a small black chip.

"The chip…" he murmured, astounded. All of what he had seen in that room with the Tallest played back in his mind, flashing in front of his eyes like a movie. That... had been real, right? She was there too, wasn't she? "But wait, if that's the chip, then what's-"

She waved a dismissive hand. "Oh, the chip I gave Zim is virtually harmless. It uses the same schema as the real one, but it's not harmful to the PAK, not really. Just knocks him out for a little while, that's all. Although, I noticed, Zim's PAK is a little..."

"A little..?"

As if realizing that she had said something she shouldn't have, Atra covered her mouth. "Ah, it's probably nothing. A lot of Irkens are fitted with malfunctioning PAK's- Zim seems to be doing surprisingly well."

Dib still had a thousand questions running through his head, and was starting to realize that Atra wasn't going to be the answer to all of them. Besides, as of right now, he had bigger concerns. "S-So, then, in that room, with the Control Brains-"

"All a show."

"...Wow. You're a, uh... good actress. So, why come up with the chip in the first place?"

"I'll explain everything once we're in my lab." She gestured to the door. "Come on, grab Zim and his SIR unit. We should hurry."

"I already told you, he's  _unconscious!"_

"No one will suspect anything, not as long as you stay close. Besides, I have someone working on Zim's situation right now."

"You mean there are more like you?" he asked as he gathered both Zim and Gir into his arm. Unsurprisingly given his height, Zim was rather light, bu since he was unable to use his left hand, carrying Zim was a bit more challenging than he'd realized.

She smirked as she watched him pull Zim close with his good arm. "You have no idea. Now let's get out of here."

* * *

_"So, how do you like it? Is it good?"_

_Zim blinked, his surroundings finally becoming clear to him. He was in a restaurant of some sort. He looked down to find a bowl of some frozen sugary treat sitting on the table in front of him._

_Oh, yeah. And he was with the Dib._

_"Zim?" Dib asked, waving a hand in front of his face. "Hey, you in there?"_

_"Yes, I am fine," Zim mumbled dismissively, batting his hand away. "I just… spaced out for a minute."_

_"Oh," Dib replied, "well, go on. It's gonna melt if you don't eat it soon. I made sure to get vanilla this time since the mint made you throw a hissy fit."_

_"I did no such thing!" Zim argued, his cheeks heating as he dug his spoon into the dessert. 'Frozen yogurt', Dib had called it. He wasn't expecting much out of it, since most Earth foods either sickened or burned him, but he was pleasantly surprised when he popped a spoonful in his mouth._

_Dib grinned, leaning closer in anticipation. "Well?"_

_"It's… not horrible, I guess," Zim grumbled._

_"Good enough for me," Dib said before placing his spoon into the bowl._

_"Hey, what do you think you're doing?!" Zim snatched the bowl and slid it back to his side of the table. "This is my frozen treat-thing! Get your own!"_

_"Come on, don't be so stingy. I'm paying for this, so the least you could do is share. Haven't you ever heard of 'sharing is caring'?"_

_"No. I don't want your filthy human germs in my 'yoo-guuurt'."_

_Dib shrugged. "You know, the bill hasn't been paid yet. I could just walk out right now, and leave you here…"_

_"You wouldn't dare-"_

_"Try me."_

_Zim glared daggers at the human across from him before he reluctantly slid the bowl forward, allowing Dib access. He watched carefully as he took a bite, that stupid smirk all over his stupidly attractive face._

_Wait. Attractive? That was new._

_He took a moment to study Dib, to see if that truly was the case. He was still the same Dib he remembered, just… bigger now. And older. He had lost the roundness in his face and was now all sharp edges. His shoulders had broadened and he had grown tall… too tall, according to Zim. The Dib shouldn't be allowed to be that tall._

_This sudden growth spurt hit him during their sophomore year. Zim came into school one day and noticed that he now had to look up at Dib. It was… extremely embarrassing, especially given that he was naturally supposed to respect anything taller than him. But he was not on Irk. He was on Earth, and like hell he'd show any kind of weakness around Dib, regardless of his newfound height._

_Dib's stupid voice had gotten deeper, too. He still found it incredibly irritating, but it was so different from what he was used to hearing._

_"You're staring again, you know. Is there something on my face?"_

_Zim shook his head, smirking. "No. I was just so astounded by your ugliness that I had to look and make sure my ocular implants weren't malfunctioning."_

_Surprisingly, Dib didn't fire an insult right back at him like he'd been expecting. He merely chuckled. "Zim…"_

_"What?"_

_"You know, we spend all this time fighting and I just… does it have to be that way?"_

_Zim nearly choked on the next bite of yogurt. "Of course it does, human filth! That's how it's always been."_

_"But I like this, you know," he argued. "You know, being with you… when we're not trying to kill each other. It's nice. Weird, but nice."_

_This time, a different feeling bubbled up inside him. It wasn't disgust like he was used to when he was around Dib. It was something new. A feeling that made his squeedlyspooch flutter and pound at the same time, a feeling that set his face on fire. He started to sweat nervously, avoiding Dib's gaze._

_"N-Nice try Dib, but flattery will get you nowhere. I already know I'm amazing and that anyone would be lucky to spend time with me."_

_Dib ducked his head, giggling like he was a little kid again. "I must be pretty lucky, then."_

_Zim awkwardly cleared his throat. "Erm… yes. Yes you are. Very lucky. Extremely lucky."_

_"You know," Dib began absentmindedly, "what if we did this more often?"_

_"Did what?"_

_"I don't know, hung out without trying to kill each other."_

_Zim made a face of clear disgust. "Gross! Like I would ever willingly spend time with my arch nemesis!"_

_"You are right now."_

_"That's only because you dragged me here and forced me into trying your gross human desserts!"_

_"That bowl's almost empty; I don't think you disliked it. Am I wrong?"_

_Zim didn't answer him, mumbling something under his breath. No, he hadn't disliked it. Far from it, actually. But he certainly wasn't going to tell him that._

_"We could still try to kill each other sometimes, if you want," Dib offered. "But I like this too."_

_Zim again didn't respond, but the tiniest of smiles spread across his lips at the thought._

* * *

Atra led Dib to a small lab on the top level of the Massive. Surprisingly, they had been unnoticed for the most part, with a few questioning stares thrown their way here and there.

Once they reached the lab, she shut the door and locked it. "Okay," she said with a hint of finality in her tone, "you can set Zim there, if you'd like." She pointed to the small metal table in the corner of the room.

Irken labs were nothing short of impressive. They sort of reminded Dib of a hospital- spacious, white, clean, and full of scary-looking equipment. Zim's base was cool, sure, but it didn't hold a  _candle_ to this. His inner nerd was practically begging for him to take a look around- but he hardly had the time for that. Maybe if he got lucky he could snag a few tools from the lab. Atra wouldn't mind, right?

He slowly walked over to the table and gingerly laid both Zim and Gir down atop it. "Alright," he said, folding his arms over his chest. "Talk."

Atra averted his intense stare, fiddling with the hem of her labcoat. "Right. Well, the real reason I created the chip… was not to get rid of Zim, although I do believe he's a threat to the Irken race… and most people in general. I originally created the chip… as a means of overthrowing the Empire."

"…You did w _hat now?"_ Dib asked, flabbergasted.

"I'm sort of here undercover," she continued, "I know this is a lame explanation but… I have to be extremely careful while I'm here. Circumstances are preventing me from telling you everything… um… how do I explain this…" She looked to the side, rubbing her chin thoughtfully, antennae twitching ever so slightly.

Clearly not amused, Dib folded his arms over his chest. "Start with why  _you_  want to overthrow your  _own_  empire."

Atra nervously looked around, as if she was afraid she was being watched. "To put it simply… there are more Irkens like Zim. Plenty more. Granted, they're not as… violent and destructive, but they were also…" she searched for the right terms, "fitted with faulty PAK's."

The realization hit Dib then. Zim had mentioned his PAK not working properly before, but he never guessed it was  _this_  bad. Zim always seemed to be function just fine with it, even with it being "faulty", so to speak. "Defective."

"Yes, defectives. I work with an underground network of defective Irkens working to take down the Empire."

Dib never imagined that a group of defective Irkens would even be capable of such a thing. According to his knowledge, the Control Brains were sort of like Big Brother, always watching and correcting behavior and thoughts through the PAK's. What made them different besides being defective? "Then the chip was…"

"A plan that I put together with the others," she explained. "The real plan was that I was going to insert the chip into the Control Brain CPU and take control by manually deactivating them both. Without the Control Brains, the Tallest have no power."

"Whoa, that would've been awesome!" Dib exclaimed before clearing his throat to appear calm. "Um, I mean… what happened? Why did you change your plan?"

She shook her head. "Our plan… was far too risky. We lost a few people along the way- defectives that were discovered by the Control Brains. I was too afraid of risking anymore lives. But by this time, I had already proposed the chip as a means of killing Zim to the Tallest as a cover-up. I had no choice but to follow through."

"...You could've killed Zim, then."

She nodded. "I could have, but… while the Empire has taken many lives, I didn't want anyone to suffer because of the actions of my own rebellion either. Not even Zim. But I see now that… if something had happened, he would be missed greatly."

Dib felt his cheeks heat at that. "Y-Yeah, well…" He cleared his throat again. "Continue."

She smiled softly at his bashfulness. She couldn't help but find it a bit endearing. "So that's when I got the idea to make a fake chip, that way we could buy ourselves some time without Zim having to die. So when it was time for Zim's execution, I swapped the real chip with the fake one, and took the real one with me for safekeeping." She sighed, her expression becoming crestfallen. "Though it seems that our time is running out. The Tallest are growing more and more suspicious."

"God, this…" Dib sighed heavily. "Look, I still don't trust you, but if you can get us out of here… I'll owe you one, I guess. And… you did kind of save Zim, in a roundabout way, so… thanks."

She nodded. "The others should have already completely erased Zim's file from the archive. To the Control Brains, it'll be like he never existed."

"And what about the Tallest?"

"I'll keep them busy while you make your escape- actually, I'm not far behind you. We're all preparing to leave soon as well. In the mean time…" She reached into her pocket and pulled out the capsule containing the chip. "Take this. It'll be safer in your hands than in mine."

Dib eyed the chip warily before placing it into his jacket pocket. "Atra, are you… really a defective Irken? I still don't get how…"

She merely grinned widely in response, shrugging. "One of a kind."

Cryptic as usual.

The grin fell just as quickly as it crossed her features. "Listen closely. The docking station is at the end of the left hallway. Wake Zim up and run as fast as you can, get to your ship, and  _go._ If you take  _your_  ship then they can't track you, but they can still shoot at you, so I hope you're a good pilot."

Dib swallowed thickly. "Uh… yeah. Right."

"I'll keep the Tallest busy for you. I can at least buy you two enough time to get out of here. Hopefully I can make my own escape as well, but…"

Dib smiled, placing his good hand on her shoulder. "Look, thank you, for everything. Um… will you be in touch?"

"You know I will. You owe me a favor now, after all."

She could just barely make out Dib's groan as she hurried out of the lab, smirking to herself.

* * *

_He was home. When had Dib taken him home?_

_His head was pounding. Zim sat up slowly, rubbing his head. He was… on the couch? What had happened?_

_Once his vision cleared enough, he found that he was home, but… not home? It was home, Zim could feel it, but it looked and seemed different, in a way. Had the computer made adjustments without telling him again? The room was dark, no lights, and the only thing Zim could make out besides the couch was Gir, in his disguise, sitting on the floor playing with the TV remote._

_"Gir," Zim said, and he was surprised to find his voice scratchy and hoarse._

_The little robot perked up at hearing his name and smiled, scampering over to his master's feet._

_Before Zim could say anything else, however, Gir quickly rid himself of his disguise, tossing the dog suit to the side. However, what Zim saw underneath that suit couldn't have been Gir._

_His eyes were not their usual warm cyan or even the occasional bright red. They were black, cold and black, empty. And in the center of his torso, there were two perfect holes going through both sides, back and front._

_Zim gasped, scurrying over to the other side of the couch. "Gir, you're… you're broken."_

_Gir said nothing in response. He didn't even move. He merely continued to look at Zim with that same blank stare in his eyes._

_Despite the fact that every part of him was screaming that this was wrong, Zim ignored it, trying his best to make some sense of the situation. "C-Come with me to the lab, Gir. I'll fix you and you'll be good as new in no time."_

_He got up to head into the kitchen, but was stopped when he saw a familiar face standing in his way, blocking the toilet. A far too familiar face, actually._

_"You… me? You're me!"_

_It was like looking in a mirror, only the Zim that stood before him was small, much younger. No more than a smeet, actually. He was dressed in the uniform given to all smeets after they are given their PAK's. His big, ruby eyes blinked up at Zim as he stared up at him in childlike wonder._

_Zim found himself growing frustrated. "Okay, that's it! This has gone on long enough. Whatever this is, whoever's doing this, you can stop now!"_

_His smeet self suddenly sniffled, his eyes watering. "I didn't mean it…"_

_Zim stilled, slowly looking down at the child version of himself. "Mean what?"_

_"Zim is sorry! I didn't mean it, it was an accident! The blob monster esploded!" he wailed, falling to his knees as if begging someone for forgiveness._

_There was a strange sensation inside him, like something was grabbing his squeedlyspooch and refused to let go. But he couldn't quite place it. He couldn't place any of this. Why was this happening?_

_"The smeet is an abomination. He must be destroyed."_

_Zim turned around, searching for the source of the voice. But there was no distinct direction that it was coming from. It was just there, all around him._

_"But he's so young!" a second voice argued. "He's a smeet, he just made a mistake!"_

_"A mistake that nearly cost us our lives! There's no place for defective Irkens in the empire and this one is most definitely a defective."_

_"But-"_

_"My Tallest, if I may have your permission to exterminate this smeet before he causes any more trouble?"_

_"No," a third voice added, a clearly male voice, "we cannot afford to lose any more soldiers right now, not when we're so close to universal domination. Just keep an eye on him, and watch his height. Even for a smeet, he seems pitifully small."_

_That voice… where did he know that voice?_

_Then things went abruptly quiet, before he heard another sound, much louder this time. It wasn't one or two distinct voices either. It sounded like a crowd, a crowd that was… weeping?_

_"Our… our almighty Tallest is gone!"_

_"Tallest Miyuki!"_

_"Dear Miyuki..!"_

_Miyuki. He knew that name._

_It was a blurred and fuzzy memory, but the name Tallest Miyuki did ring a bell. Miyuki was obviously a previous Tallest. What happened to her? How did she…_

_...Was it his fault?_

* * *

Dib concluded that he  _still_  couldn't trust Atra as far as he could throw her. But his first priority was getting himself and Zim out of here alive and safe, and if that meant dealing with her, then so be it.

He quickly rushed over to where Zim was laying. He looked so peaceful in his sleep that Dib almost didn't want to disturb him. If Dib had the time, he would have studied him for hours. But he really didn't want to carry Zim any longer and he figured that it was best that he be awake and aware.

He placed a firm hand on his shoulder and shook him roughly. No point in being gentle when they were pressed for time. "Zim, wake up."

No response.

"Zim," Dib repeated, slightly louder this time. He didn't want to risk screaming, lest he alert nearby Irkens of their location. He shook him again, and once more. "Come on, wake up!"

Zim shifted slightly, but didn't open his eyes.

"Come on, you dick, I know you hear me. Wake up, damn it!" Dib violently shook him yet again, and when that still elicited no response from the Irken, Dib reared his hand back and slapped him clean across the cheek. "Get up!"

Crimson eyes snapped open. There was a hiss and a near instantaneous blur of black in his vision before Zim's claws slashed across his cheek. Since he was wearing his gloves he wasn't able to pierce Dib's skin, but it was enough to leave three angry slash marks across his pale cheek.

"Ow…" Dib moaned, nursing his injured cheek, "what the fuck, Zim?!"

 _"Dib?!"_ Zim narrowed his eyes at Dib, rubbing at them as if attempting to clean them. "Oh. It's just you."

"Who the hell did you think it was?! And did you really have to scratch me?!"

"I felt something  _hit me!_ What was I supposed to do?!"

"Asshole!"

"Stink-beast!"

The two proceeded to glare at each other heatedly, ruby clashing with gold, before a large, dopey grin broke out across Dib's face. Without thinking of the repercussions that were sure to occur, he grabbed Zim's wrist and pulled him into his arms, holding the Irken tight against his chest.

"God, I missed you."

Zim's first reaction was to scream.

Of course, he didn't, as he didn't want to show weakness in front of the Dib. But he did let out an undignified squeak when his face made contact with his chest. Damn it, Dib would probably  _never_ let him live that down. His second reaction then, was to  _fight_  it. Zim didn't like being touched by anyone or anything, but that was especially true for Dib. He squirmed in Dib's arms, trying to break free of his hold. "Release me! Release me or I will destroy you!"

Dib ignored him, and if anything, his grip got tighter. "Zim. I've had… a really fucking stressful day. I thought you were dead, then you turned out not to be dead, and... ugh, never mind. Just shut the fuck up and let me hug you for a minute, okay?"

Zim knew what a hug was. It was a form of human affection that at first appeared utterly disgusting to him. Humans showed affection in odd, unsanitary ways. He'd researched human affection a few times for his old schemes, and after discovering the sickening way humans mate, he'd decided then that if he were part of a species that took mates, he'd sooner die before taking a human mate. He shivered just thinking about it.

However, his body began to relax despite his brain trying to tell him to panic. He couldn't deny that there was something he liked about having Dib's arms around him. It was an odd sensation that he couldn't say he hated. It was so foreign to Zim; to have someone so close, his enemy, no less. His enemy that had traveled across the stars to save him.

Stupid Dib, being all  _warm and comfortable._

"…You're a fool, Dib-worm," he murmured, pressing further into the human's warmth. Dib seemed to give off heat and for whatever reason, despite not being cold, Zim was taking in as much as he could. He didn't respond, but Zim felt the human's arms slowly leave him, and for a fleeting second, he found himself missing that warmth.

"Look, I missed you and all, but we can talk about that stuff later. Right now, we need to move."

Zim nodded his agreement and was about to follow Dib out the door, but noticed that there was something off. "Dib, wait."

"What?"

"My PAK… feels strange…" Suddenly, the memories of the past hour hit him almost as if it were a physical force, nearly knocking the wind out of him. The Tallest, the Control Brains, his execution, the female…

"The chip!" he shouted, panicked. "The chip! Dib, there's no time-"

"Relax!" Dib gestured to the chip that now sat on the metal table. "Your PAK ejected it already, see? Besides, this chip isn't the real one… oh, it's better to explain on the way. Come on!" He swiped the faux chip, placing it into his pocket, before grabbing the Irken's wrist once again and dragging him off the table.

Zim snatched his hand away. "Zim can keep up just fine, thanks," he muttered grumpily before his PAK legs shot out of either side, holding him at just above eye level with Dib.

Dib smirked. "I know. I was just worried about your teeny tiny legs, space boy. Think your PAK legs can keep up with my superior human legs?"

Zim mirrored his smirk. "Oh, they'll do more than keep up,  _Dib_. I'll leave you in the dust!"

"Bring it on, Zim!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hugs! Lol I couldn't keep up with the angst forever you know
> 
> Oh, and, if you guys like my writing and would like to see more from me, please consider buying me a Kofi? It would help not only with my fanfics but with my original projects as well.
> 
> My Kofi username is in my profile!


	13. Chapter 13

"Atra," Red hissed, looming over her with a threatening, icy glare. "Where is Zim? And where is the human?!"

Atra swallowed thickly, bowing her head in shame. She was ashamed to admit it, but she found herself completely frozen in his presence. "Zim… Zim is… dead."

Lying through right her teeth probably wasn't the best idea, but if she could just manage this one last thing before...

"Dead?" Purple questioned incredulously.

She nodded. "Yes. The chip has successfully managed to shut down all of his systems."

"…And what of the human?"

Atra briefly thought of Dib, and prayed to whatever deities were out there that he had already escaped with Zim. "He… escaped. I couldn't track him. You have my deepest apologies."

Red and Purple exchanged confused glances before the former cursed out-loud, slamming his fist into the wall beside them. The force of it caused the gauntlet to leave a dent in the wall. Purple placed a comforting hand on his shoulder, as if to help calm him down.

Red huffed. "You know what? That's fine. This is  _fine_. The human is of no concern. Our main problem is Zim. Atra, check the Control Brain archives, make sure that Zim's PAK is no longer active."

"B-But sirs, my access to the archives is limited. Only the almighty Tallest are allowed to view the Control Brain archives. Besides, the twelve hours haven't passed yet."

"Oh. That's right." Tallest Purple sighed. "Very well, I suppose we'll have to do it ourselves."

Ruby eyes clashed with magenta, boring into hers with an unprecedented, dark fury. "If Zim is not dead within the next 24 hours, you can forget about your reward. I'll have you banished to Foodcourtia if that menace somehow managed to survive. We placed our trust in a lowly Irken  _only_  because we were  _desperate_. Remember that. Do I make myself clear?"

She tried her best to swallow down the sudden fear his words struck her with. "C-Crystal, sir."

_I can't hack into the archives on my own. I need to find a hacker, and fast. I only have a few hours left to make my escape._

* * *

Turns out that having them race each other, rather than running together, worked out better than either of them anticipated. They were pretty much neck and neck the whole time until Zim, in a move that Dib  _should've_  seen coming but didn't, used his PAK legs to scale the walls and beat him to the docking station.

"Come on," Dib shouted, chest heaving as he gestured to the left side of the room. "Tak's ship is this way!"

Zim scowled. "You want to take  _that_  piece of junk back to Earth? A battle cruiser would be far more efficient-"

"If we leave Tak's ship here, they can use it to track us! We have a better chance of getting out of here in one piece if we take her ship!"

"But we don't know how far away we are from Earth! The Massive could be months away from the Earth by now!"

Dib huffed irritably before roughly grabbing Zim's wrist. "We'll figure it out on the way, because in case you haven't noticed, we're in a bit of a hurry! Now  _let's go!"_

Cursing under his breath, Zim reluctantly followed Dib to where Tak's ship was. It was a tight fit since it was only made for a single passenger, but even if it was cramped, they'd have to make do for now.

"Move over, I'm driving," Dib declared, shoving Zim to the side so he could access the controls.

Zim, as he should've figured, wasn't happy with that arrangement, and shoved Dib back over to the other side. "What?! Absolutely not, Zim is the far superior pilot.  _I'm_  driving."

"Damn it Zim, we don't have time for this!"

"So let me have the controls then!"

"No! Besides, Tak's ship doesn't like me, but it hates you! If you try to pilot this thing who knows what it'll do to you!"

Zim rolled his eyes. "Please. The ship does not hate me. How could anyone hate me?"

"I hated you for a  _very_  large portion of my life."

"Not helping,  _Dib."_

Dib smirked. "Just answering your question."

After a few more moments of bickering and jostling the controls from each other, Dib finally managed to gain control of the ship long enough to somehow get it to take off. The ship lurched forward as it launched out of the docking station.

"You are a terrible pilot, Dib."

"Shut up."

A few moments of silence passed before Dib heard the ship's interface activate.

_"You brought the abomination with you?!"_

"I did say this was going to be a rescue mission, didn't I?"

_"I will not allow the Irken singlehandedly responsible for slaughtering two almighty Tallests to-"_

"I couldn't leave you there!" Dib argued. "I can't let anyone get their hands on this ship. If I left you there, they would've used you to track us down and Earth would've been in danger! Again!"

_"And that's my problem how?!"_

"I don't want to have to turn you off. Come on. Work with me a little here?"

Surprisingly, the ship fell silent, though Dib could imagine that if it were capable of thinking in the traditional human sense, it would have a few choice words for him.

Zim scooted closer to the opening hatch, trying to get as far away from Dib as possible. He looked down nervously, fiddling with the hem of his uniform. "...So..."

Dib knew what he was going to say, and frankly, he wasn't in the mood to talk about it. "Save it."

He had never taken well to being ignored. "Why did you go after me? Zim demands an answer!"

Dib bit his lip, hesitant to respond. A part of him wished he could say what Zim wanted to hear just to shut him up, but that was the thing- he never  _knew_  what Zim wanted to hear, not really. "Did you really think I wouldn't?"

"I  _told you_ not to."

"And when have I ever listened to what you said?"

Zim frowned. "Never. You never do what Zim asks of you."

"Bingo. There's your answer. Can we drop it now?"

Truthfully, Zim wanted the same. He wanted to forget that any of this had ever happened. He wanted them to go back to the way they were before this, before Zim ever found out the truth of his mission. He wanted to hate Dib without second-guessing himself all the time. He wanted to look at him without feeling like his squeedlyspooch was going to burst.

Zim could do that. It would hurt him like nothing ever had before, but if that was what Dib wanted, he could forget this encounter and make things easier for the both of them. But he had a feeling that despite Dib's words, that wasn't how he truly felt. After all, even Zim could admit (to himself) that Dib was much more honest than he was.

Still, he didn't answer, figuring that if Dib had something to say, then he'd say it.

A few moments of tense, uncomfortable silence passed before Dib finally heaved a heavy sigh and put the ship on autopilot, leaning back against the seat. "You know we have to talk about this, right?"

"We don't  _have_  to talk about anything," Zim pointed out.

"Yes, we do. And as painful as this is gonna be, you need to hear me out."

_"Why?"_

Dib smirked. "Because at least I know that while you're stuck on this ship with me, you have no choice but to listen."

"…I hate you."

Dib didn't bother to retort back with his usual 'hate you too' or 'the feeling's mutual'.

Zim huffed in annoyance, folding his arms across his chest. "Well? Aren't you going to say it?"

"Say what?"

"'I told you so', in that stupid Dib-voice of yours."

Dib chuckled lightheartedly. "The idea is tempting, but no. I think I knew deep down that you'd end up ignoring me anyway. You wouldn't be Zim if you didn't."

"Then why did you come after me? Why not leave me to my fate?"

Dib looked over at the alien, gold clashing with ruby. Ah, finally, the dreaded question he still had no answer to. "Do I really need to say it?"

"Any sensible person would have left their enemy to their fate. The Tallest were going to kill me eventually if you had not come. You knew that. So yes. You do."

Dib should have figured that he'd get that response. He drew in a deep breath. "Would you believe me if I said I  _didn't_  want you dead?"

Zim 'hmmed', tapping his chin as if in deep thought. "Hm, considering all the times you've told me in graphic detail about how you want me on an autopsy table, I'd say,  _no_."

Dib grinned at that, chuckling halfheartedly. "Come on, you can't hold that against me forever. I was a kid!"

"Do  _not_  underestimate my ability to hold a grudge."

"Believe me, I'm not. Besides, you've said some pretty fucked up stuff too, you know."

Zim gasped, as if he were appalled at the accusation. "Name one instance where my behavior was 'fucked up', as you put it."

"Do you want the list in alphabetical order?"

Zim waved him off. "Whatever. I'm amazing. You're just too stupid to see it, Dib-fool."

"You are pretty amazing, you know," Dib commented idly. "Seriously, as many times as you've escaped the Tallest… that's impressive."

Zim grinned sheepishly, refusing to so much as look at Dib. He really hoped that Dib couldn't see the furious blush rising on his cheeks at the praise.

"…I'm starting to think something might be seriously wrong with me. You're right. It would've been smart for me to leave you to die but I didn't. I came for you because... I didn't want to live without you."

Zim slowly turned to look at Dib, eyes widening.

"I used to dream of the day that I'd finally expose you. I used to dream of when people would start taking me seriously. But now? You know what I dream about? You. All the fucking time, in every possible way, and I don't get it. I don't get it at all because I should hate you, for everything you've done. I feel like I should hate you but I  _don't_. I  _can't_. So there. That's why I went after you, Zim. Are you happy now?"

The tension was thick, so thick that Dib felt as though he could reach out and slice it with a knife. He could feel Zim's eyes on him and it took everything he had not to get lost in those exotic eyes of his. He kept his gaze locked onto the expanse of space that zoomed past them.

"…No," Zim finally murmured. "I'm not 'happy', Dib. I'm not happy at all! You think you can just…  _say_ something like that and expect me to be happy?! You… we… we are  _enemies_ , Dib! What's the matter with you, is your brain malfunctioning?!"

"Yes!" Dib shouted back. "Yes, Zim. Somehow, in some twisted, fucked up way, I stopped hating you. So I guess my brain is broken. The fuck are you going to do about it?" This time, he wasn't afraid to get close, to challenge Zim. To look him in the eye and show him that he wasn't backing down, and that he wasn't going to let Zim back down either.

"I'm going to do… something!" Zim insisted. "I can't let you go on like this!"

"Why not? Isn't it easier?"

Zim made a noise akin to a growl, stalking closer to Dib. "In case you haven't noticed  _Dib_ , I no longer have a mission. I've lost nearly everything these past few days. But I will  _not lose you,_ do you understand me?! You  _will_  keep fighting me, because I can't afford to have you leave me like everything else did!"

Time almost seemed to stand still. The ship was no longer speeding through the stars. Dib felt like he was floating. It was like the sky had finally become clear after days upon days of rain and dark clouds.

"Zim," he breathed out, inching closer to the Irken. "I'm here. I'm not going anywhere, I promise."

Zim didn't respond. The realization of what he'd said seemed to finally hit him, and he was clearly suffering with the consequences. Zim never did have good control of his mouth. His cheeks were a dark violet, his eyes half-lidded, mouth drawn into a slight pout.

"We don't have to fight each other you know," Dib told him. "You don't need to have me hurt you to feel like... like you still have something. It's okay to feel like you're alone, I feel like that all the time. I made up my mind a while ago. I'm not going to leave you. Promise."

Zim opened his mouth to deny it, to insist that he didn't need the filthy Dib-beast, but at this point, who else was he trying to convince but himself? "What about what you said before? About wanting to do…  _human things?"_

"I'd still like to do some of that stuff, at some point," Dib admitted. "But I'd like to do that with you."

He could say with certainty now, that after traveling through space and fighting aliens, the mundane life wasn't really for him. But he guessed that it wouldn't really kill him to go to a party or hunt for Bigfoot every now and then either. Earth was occasionally a nice place.

"Foolish Earth-boy, Zim has no interest in your silly human activities."

Dib knew he was full of shit. Zim was always curious about the latest trends and what was going on in the world today. And despite what he liked to say, Dib also knew full well that Zim liked Earth television and movies and even certain songs.

"Yeah. Sure."

Zim's antennae flattened against his skull as he pondered his next words. "Dib-beast."

"Yes?"

"What… is Zim to do now?"

Dib shrugged. "Whatever you want. Earth is your home now, so you can get a job. Go to school."

"Zim has had quite enough of the school."

He chuckled. To be honest, so had he. "Can't say I blame you there. But you don't have to stay either. You could travel the stars. Maybe go see planets that  _aren't_  part of the Irken Empire?"

"That's not very many, you know."

Dib shrugged. "I'm just making suggestions. It's like I kept telling you before, Zim. You're free now. You can do whatever you want."

Freedom. Zim had always thought he was free, but this...  _this_  feeling... it was new. Was this what it meant to be truly liberated? He no longer had a duty to anyone. He didn't have anyone to please. It was just... Zim. "Whatever… I want?"

"Within reason, but yeah."

Zim looked up at Dib, who was smiling down at him with that stupid, lopsided Dib-grin. Truth be told, he didn't know what the future would hold, and he wasn't sure what he wanted for himself. But right now, if there was one thing he knew for sure, it was that he wanted to go back to Earth. He missed the Earth's stupid blue sky. He missed waffles and diner fries. He missed his base. Hell, he even missed  _Minimoose_.

"I want… to go home. With the Dib."

"…Then your wish is my command."

* * *

"Something's wrong," Red muttered darkly, "there's no trace of him anywhere. He's just…  _gone."_

"Then that means we succeeded, right? The chip was successful!" Purple replied cheerily from the couch, sipping on a soda.

"But this is…  _wrong._ When an Irken's PAK is deactivated, there's always a backup file containing their information that's stored in the archive for future reference. But… there's nothing here for Zim. It's like any and all traces of his existence were just… wiped clean."

"You worry too much. Think about it this way," Purple paused to sling an arm around his co-leader's neck. "Zim is gone, and we don't have to worry about him anymore. And since Zim's info is gone, the Control Brains are none the wiser! Our positions as Tallest are safe, at least for now."

Normally, Red would have just laughed it off and brushed it aside like the other Irken leader, but there was something nagging at him in the pit of his squeedlyspooch. He could  _feel_  it, and to be honest, he was quite new to the whole 'feeling' thing. He didn't care for it much.

"You know, before, I never had to worry, because we run the Irken Empire, the fiercest empire on this side of the galaxy. But this is different. I can't explain it. I just have this feeling something bad is gonna happen."

"Bad? To the  _empire_?" Purple threw his head back and laughed. "Come on, now you're just being ridiculous. The empire's gonna be just fine, especially with Zim out of the picture."

"Well yeah, obviously. I just… it's nothing. I'm being paranoid." Red straightened himself, rising from his spot on the couch. "Let's have a celebration! Zim is gone for good this time, and our position as Tallest is safe once again."

"Now you're talking!" Purple grinned. "You know, I have to admit, I didn't think I was going to like sharing the position of almighty Tallest with anyone, but I don't mind sharing with you."

Red smirked, waving a dismissive hand. "Don't get mushy on me. Come on, we should start making the preparations."

Purple's reassuring words didn't make the feeling in his squeedlyspooch go away, but Red couldn't allow it to bother him, at least, not right now. He was a leader, and right now, he had to be strong for his people. For his planet.

_For the Empire._

* * *

_"Why are we being forced to do this again?" Purple asked with an annoyed sigh._

_"Because that stupid Zim can't keep his creations under control," Red snapped in response. "You know, that's the second almighty Tallest in three years. Three years!"_

_Purple didn't appear fazed. "Eh, I didn't really like Tallest Spork anyway."_

**_"Irken Red, Irken Purple. Welcome."_ **

_They both bowed and wiggled their antennae as a show of respect. "Hello, almighty Control Brains."_

_"You have our apologies for being late," said Red._

_"Yes, you'll have to forgive our tardiness. We were just finishing up with training at the academy."_

_"It matters not. As you are aware, Irk is in crisis. After Tallest Spork's untimely demise, Irk is in desperate need of a leader."_

_"Well yeah, have you found one eligible yet?" Purple inquired curiously._

**_"Yes. There are two that are eligible, actually."_ **

_"Come again?"_

_"Irken Red, Irken Purple, you are both currently the tallest Irkens on Irk. However, you are both the exact same height, and there is traditionally only one Tallest."_

_Red and Purple exchanged confused glances. "Uh-"_

_"Therefore, in an effort to promote cooperation and unity among the Irken people, you are both required to rule Irk side by side, as the almighty Tallests."_

_"What?!" they shouted simultaneously._

**_"This decision is final."_ **

_"But… there have never been two tallest before!" Red argued._

_"Yeah, and why should I have to share the throne with him?!" Purple added, pointing a clawed finger at Red._

_"You will both hold the same amount of power and authority. All Irkens are expected to answer to you both as per Irken law. You will each divvy up the responsibilities amongst yourselves. Again, this decision is final."_

_"B-But… what about the academy?" Red asked._

_"Yeah, we haven't finished our training yet!"_

**_"There's no time. Irk needs a leader, and you two are the only ones eligible. You must take control now!"_ **

_The two Irken elites fell silent as the weight of their newfound situation fell on them. They were both now the almighty Tallest. They had always been in competition with each other, on height and pretty much everything else. Who was the best with combat training? Weapons handling? Academics? It seemed like whenever one seemed to be getting ahead, the other would come and put them back on equal footing. And now, they had just made history. They were the first two Irkens to ever rule together as Tallest._

_Neither of them were ecstatic about the idea of sharing the power. But being the almighty Tallest was a privilege, something that every Irken strived to be. Not to mention that the two of them had always done everything together anyways. Rarely were the two seen apart. Might as well rule together anyway._

_"Very well," Red said with finality, bowing his head respectfully._

_"We graciously accept your terms."_

* * *

_"Well, Irken Atra, you seem like an interesting young lady. After looking through your record I must say- I'm quite impressed. "_

Atra smiled softly, leaning back against her seat. "Thank you. You seem pretty interesting yourself, captain."

_"Ahaha, well, I'm flattered that you think so. I must admit, you're one of the most interesting submissions we've ever received. If we had you and your team's help, it would greatly improve our chances of success. Although, I can't help but wonder… what would make you do this? Irkens are notorious for being fiercely loyal to their missions. Forgive me for asking, but are you… by any chance-"_

"A defective?" She chuckled dryly. "Close, but guess again." She pressed the button on her uniform hidden by her labcoat.

_"Oh, I see... incredible! I commend you for being able to hide out in the Irken Empire for so long. Our organization has a strong alliance with your republic, so you will be a useful asset. I look forward to meeting you in person."_

Atra bowed her head as a show of respect. "Likewise, captain."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: WE'RE IN THE HOME STRETCH GUYS! The next chapter will be the epilogue! (no need to worry, the sequel is already in production)
> 
> Man I really didn't like calling the Tallest "Red and Purple" (it just seems so silly) but apparently those are their proper names, sO-
> 
> Stay tuned for the epilogue!


	14. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: AND HERE WE ARE! The final chapter of "The Game"!
> 
> I almost never update this quickly, but quite frankly, making you guys wait for the epilogue? When I already had it finished?
> 
> So without further adieu, enjoy the epilogue!

"Remind me again why we're here?"

"It's a  _surprise_ ," Dib told him for what had to be the tenth time that night. "Has no one ever given you a gift before?"

Zim hated surprises, actually. He liked being aware of any and every possible outcome. Surprises were one of his worst enemies. He opened his mouth to respond and tell him just that, but Dib cut him off. "Nevermind. Don't answer that."

Zim grumbled something unintelligible under his breath. "Why are we on your roof? Couldn't we have done this in my base?" he whined.

"No, cause then it would've ruined the surprise. Plus, the view is much better over here." Dib gestured to the starry night sky and the large full moon overhead. "See?"

Zim turned to look at the supposed "view" before he sighed and waved a dismissive hand. "Pfft, your Earth moon is not that impressive. Irk has three moons, and they're all twice the size of your pathetic moon!"

Dib couldn't help but laugh. "Right. Okay. Close your eyes."

"Why?"

"It's how we give gifts on Earth. Just do it."

Zim didn't like being told what to do, but simply because he was receiving a gift, he shut his eyes as per instructed.

"Are you ready?"

"Just get on with it, stink-meat."

There was a whistle and the sound of jets before suddenly Zim was met with a lapful of robot. "HI MASTER!"

Zim's eyes flew open. "Gir?! You're here! You're alive! How did you..?" He reached out, placing a tentative hand on the robot's shoulder, almost as he wasn't sure if Gir was real.

"Mary fixeded me and made me all better again, see?" The SIR unit held his arms out wide as if showing himself off for his master to see. Indeed, the two holes that had been drilled into his back were now completely gone, like they had never been there in the first place.

He thought back to that moment where he was sure that Gir was dead, when those drills had carved their way into his back. Zim had never felt that kind of fear before. That cold, vice-like grip on his squeedlyspooch... he never wanted to feel it again. If he was being honest, he didn't want to  _feel_ at all.

Zim looked up at Dib with wide eyes, astonished. "You… how did you manage to fix Gir..?"

Dib sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck. "You had some spare SIR unit parts lying around, and thankfully they were enough to fix him. I had your computer walk me through the process," he explained. It definitely hadn't been a particularly easy fix, but as the Computer had told him, it was a miracle that Gir even functioned in the first place. Finding something to replace the damaged parts wasn't difficult.

"So that's why I caught you snooping around my house last week!" Zim shouted, pointing an accusatory finger at him.

Dib smirked, throwing his hands up defensively. It's not like Zim was really going to do anything about it anyway. "Guilty as charged."

Zim averted his gaze, preferring to look at the shingles on the roof. He absentmindedly traced swirls on them with a gloved claw. "If I had known that you had him, I could've fixed him myself."

"I know, obviously, but I wanted to do something nice for you. Now, what do you say?"

"Huh?"

"You know what I mean. When people do something nice for you, there's something you would typically say to that person..." Dib trailed.

Zim  _absolutely_  knew what he meant, unfortunately. For the second time that night, Zim grumbled something inaudible under his breath.

Dib's smug smirk only grew. He leaned in closer and cupped his ear. "What's that Zim? I didn't quite catch it."

"Ugh… Zim is  _oh_   _so_  grateful that you fixed Gir. There. Happy?"

Dib would never know it, but Zim truthfully was grateful. He'd had no idea that Dib had bothered to take his SIR unit with them. When he was lost, spiraling down into his own pit of depression, Gir was quite literally the only one there for him. That may not mean anything to Gir, but it meant something to him, and that was enough.

He knew that that was as close to a thank you as he was ever going to get from Zim, and he was content with that. "Close enough." Dib patted the spot next to him. "Sit."

"Why?"

"Cause there's supposed to be a meteor shower tonight and I wanna watch."

"Watch it by yourself then, it's just a bunch of stupid meteors."

_"Zim."_

Then Dib gave him that look, that stupid look that he knew he couldn't refuse. One look into his eyes and suddenly it was like his tongue was too large for his mouth and his insides were jelly. It was a strange, foreign feeling. Foreign, in the sense that it was new, but... as of late... around the Dib...

He shook his head. It was probably just nerves. He was new to the whole "feelings" thing.

Zim awkwardly seated himself next to Dib, keeping his arms folded across his chest. "I hate you."

"Oh, just shut up and watch."

And for as long as Zim lived, he would never admit that on that hot summer night in June, he let Dib get just a little closer, close enough so that their arms could touch, so that their hands could sit intertwined atop Dib's lap.

~Fin (Part One)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: AND THAT'S IT!
> 
> I want to thank everyone for the support! This story has received nothing but positive feedback. Your kind words really do motivate me to write!
> 
> As for the sequel, please stay tuned for that! Expect the first chapter within this month! I'm not sure how many fics I plan to have for this series yet, but I guess only time will tell!
> 
> Again, thank you to everyone for the kind comments and messages! I'll see you all again shortly for the sequel!


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